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Hubby left and barely seeing his kids

135

Comments

  • POPPYOSCAR
    POPPYOSCAR Posts: 14,902 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    WickedWitch123 wrote: »
    You're right, I have tried to encourage them both. She's just not interested at the moment and as someone else has said she would rather be with her friends. My worry is that because he isn't making more of an effort so much time will pass and it'll be too late. My parents are still together so this is so alien to me - i'm so frightened of the effect its having on her.


    How is your daughter with you? Does she like to spend time with you.

    The only time mine likes to be with me is when I take her shopping for clothes!!
  • CH27
    CH27 Posts: 5,531 Forumite
    WickedWitch123 wrote: »
    He lives 5 minutes away on his own. He's currently living in a property we jointly own (which is another issue as its a buy-to-let and he shouldn't really be there).

    So no other woman to distract his attention?
    Try to be a rainbow in someone's cloud.
  • WickedWitch123
    WickedWitch123 Posts: 241 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 100 Posts Combo Breaker
    POPPYOSCAR wrote: »
    Is there no other family member who could speak to him and make him understand how this is affecting his children? If not, how about writing him a letter letting him know that you are concerned about the children.

    Ive been in touch with his dad, brother, best friend and church leaders. He has given them all short shriffed. I think that he has had some kind of breakdown and has just shut everyone out. His parents are frightened to do too much because they don't want to lose contact with their grandchildren.
  • WickedWitch123
    WickedWitch123 Posts: 241 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 100 Posts Combo Breaker
    CH27 wrote: »
    So no other woman to distract his attention?

    Not that i know of but ive really no way of knowing.
  • WickedWitch123
    WickedWitch123 Posts: 241 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 100 Posts Combo Breaker
    POPPYOSCAR wrote: »
    How is your daughter with you? Does she like to spend time with you.

    The only time mine likes to be with me is when I take her shopping for clothes!!

    She's a typical teenager with me. She'll spend time with me if her boyfriend can come too or if i'm spending money on her.
  • POPPYOSCAR
    POPPYOSCAR Posts: 14,902 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    WickedWitch123 wrote: »
    Ive been in touch with his dad, brother, best friend and church leaders. He has given them all short shriffed. I think that he has had some kind of breakdown and has just shut everyone out. His parents are frightened to do too much because they don't want to lose contact with their grandchildren.



    If he has had some kind of breakdown then I would not worry about the children spending more time with him tbh!.

    I do not understand why his parents would be frightened to lose contact with their grandchildren? Surely they could maintain that through you?
  • WickedWitch123
    WickedWitch123 Posts: 241 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 100 Posts Combo Breaker
    Wilma33 wrote: »
    What's you and your daughters relationship like with the in laws? Could they be the "bridge" to your ex keeping a relationship with DD?

    Our relationship has been ok but they're frightened to get too involved in case he stops speaking to them and they lose touch with the grandchildren. I spoke to his dad a couple of weeks ago and he promised to call back but ive heard nothing since.
  • POPPYOSCAR
    POPPYOSCAR Posts: 14,902 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    WickedWitch123 wrote: »
    She's a typical teenager with me. She'll spend time with me if her boyfriend can come too or if i'm spending money on her.

    Has her dad asked to see her and invited the boyfriend along?
  • WickedWitch123
    WickedWitch123 Posts: 241 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 100 Posts Combo Breaker
    POPPYOSCAR wrote: »
    Has her dad asked to see her and invited the boyfriend along?

    Actually no he's never done that. He wouldn't approve of her having a boyfriend at 14 so I don't think he'd want to be seen to be condoning it.
  • CH27
    CH27 Posts: 5,531 Forumite
    WickedWitch123 wrote: »
    Ive been in touch with his dad, brother, best friend and church leaders. He has given them all short shriffed. I think that he has had some kind of breakdown and has just shut everyone out. His parents are frightened to do too much because they don't want to lose contact with their grandchildren.


    If he has had a breakdown then I wouldn't worry about him not seeing much of both children at the moment.
    Try to be a rainbow in someone's cloud.
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