Enough is enough - the great declutter

charlies_mum

Right ladies, sorry some of you are feeling down, so I want you to do exactly what I say

Step away from the mess, and close the door

Put the kettle on and sits the kids in front of a DVD. Make a nice cup of coffee, and sit on the comfiest chair you have with a really trashy magazine, and don't move for at least half an hour.

Everything will still be there later, but it might not look so bad. Take a bit of time for yourself, and later when the kids have gone to bed, fill the bath, use half a bottle of bubble bath, and get in there with a glass of wine - it's guaranteed to make you feel better.

Olliebeak

I'm lucky these days that there is only myself and OH most of the time. Generally, I only need to wash twice a week - Wednesday and Saturday usually (unless the weather is bad as I don't like to do laundry when I can't get it dried outside - though in the winter I use airers and radiator bars). On a Wednesday I do a white/pale load and on Saturday another white/pale load and a dark load.

Change the bed fortnightly and the king-size cover fits exactly over the landing bannister and dries in less than 24 hours - nice and flat. Very rare I do any ironing - only for special occasions:j !!! I reckon I did more than my fair share of laundry/ironing when my three kids were young - and I've no intention of ever becoming a slave to it again :T .

I keep two laundry bins in a cupboard on the landing - no room in the tiny bathroom! They are both plastic swing top kitchen bins from Asda - the cheapie SmartPrice ones! A cream one for white/light coloured clothes and a grey one for darks. My 9 year old granddaughter was most disgusted when she first saw them - 'eeuuuuuwwww yuk, Narnie! you put your washing in the bin!' Had to show her that they were both brand new bins and nothing grubby about them at all! Still don't think that she would like her friends to find out tho :rotfl: - kids eh!!!

cat64

Aah thanks everyone you are all so lovely on here, haven't had time to read all the replies fully but thanks so much. Everyone I know always seems so super-organised and I've always been c*** at housework.

Still recall with deep shame when OH and I were renting a flat above a hos
pital, one day when I was out two women from the hospital used a spare key to come in and then spent 10minutes railing at me about how the flat was a complete tip and a health hazard (!!) honestly it wasn't that bad, yes it was very untidy and cluttered but I wouldn't have said dirty. I was devastated and felt so dirty and ashamed:o. Until then I had never really taken much notice of housework but it made me a bit paranoid about how people would judge me by the state of the house

Over the years I have come to realise that unfortunately many people do judge you on this. In fact I have stopped inviting anyone over because I'm worried they'll no longer want to know me if they see what our house looks like. I feel bad because I know the kids don't want to ask people in for the same reason.

Anyway sorry to offload, again, did just mean to thank you for your kind replies:o


Pigpen, I know where you're coming from, its horrible when you're kids are upset, you just want to do anything to stop them hurting don't you? Been there with the animals, we lost 3 rabbits a year ago to viral haemorragic (sp) disease which I had never even heard of, but apparently you can have them immunised against. Vet had never told me:mad:. Anyway it is highly contagious and they all died within 48 hours of each other. Unfortunately loss is part of having pets.:(

Charis

Lemon_Tree wrote: »

pigpen, you sound like my sister. Went round one sunday when she was trying to get her boys to tidy their room in the end she stormed up with bin bags, it was like sitting next to the wailing wall for the whole afternoon i can tell you!

I've just had a flashback to 20 or more years ago when my late OH, stepfather to my children, decided he had had enough of their bicycles lying in the garden. Unknown to me, he waited till they were at school and gave their bikes to the 'old iron man' who called our estate for scrap metal every week and rang a hand bell to announce his presence.

My middle son was in class as the pick up truck went past, announced by the hand bell, with his bicycle clearly visible at the top of the pile, complete with the horn he had just spent several week's pocket money buying. I don't think he has ever got over it.

Charis

Olliebeak

cat64 - How DARE those women just come in with the key! Cheeky mares!! You pay the rent - it's your home! Yes - they have the right to inspection, but I'm pretty darn certain that they are supposed to give you notice and also give you the opportunity to be present when they enter! The only reason for entering without your knowledge/presence is in the event of danger to other people/rest of the building. Even they are supposed to make an attempt to let you know.

This little story is only to give an example of how appearances can be deceptive. I had one neighbour, again when the kids were little, and she always gave the impression of being neat and tidy, smart clothes, hair immaculate, good perfumes, spent money like there was no tomorrow. She asked me to help her out one day with one of the children. I got the shock of my life. She'd had the dreaded 'letter from school' (the one about n**s - don't want to type the word or I'll get the itches!). And she never even knew that she should check the kids heads for the darling little creatures. She wanted to ask me how to go about dealing with them. Luckily, I had three bottles of Priorderm (the 'be all and end all' of l**e prevention in the 80's) in stock so volunteered to show her what to do. That poor child was infested and her mother nearly died of fright when she saw what they were! It took 2 bottles to sort the child's hair out (long hair!) and then I gave the mother the other bottle for herself - that scared her even more when she realised that she probably had them as well.

Just goes to show that many of those people that YOU think are so well-organised and 'sorted' may not be quite what you think!

Young kiddies are a part of life - and so is the mess that goes with them. If you can get them to help you tidy up at the end of the day it helps. Even if they can get their heads around putting one thing away BEFORE getting out something else - that can help.

When they get older, try a box at the foot of the stairs. Throw into it anything that gets left lying around and tell them that they have 2 days to take things back to their rooms (or wherever they should be kept) and then they will go to the tip/in the bin/charity shop as they can't possibly want them if they don't care about them. Believe me, you only ever have to act on that threat once! Good idea to do that one 2 days before the binman is due - so that the threat has a really good possibility of being carried out!

cat64

You're right Olliebeak they had no right to come in but they did and I was so shocked and taken aback by what they said I never thought to protest! (It was 20 years or so ago now - obviously has made a lasting mark on me!!).

My children I'm ashamed to say, are all over the age of 12! They are just lazy....

icandream

cat64 wrote: »

Morning everyone! Please can someone give me some much needed moral support. I'm really struggling at the moment - with the house, kids everything. I've been in tears today as sometimes it all seems so hopeless. Whatever little I do achieve seems to be undone in no time at all.

Hi all
I've not posted on this thread before, but have been following sections of it with interest and Cat, your post really struck a chord. I feel exactly the same, and sometimes it all seems overwhelming because it's impossible to know where to begin. It helped me to read your post, as I often feel all the other mums around me cope so much better. When I go into their houses, there's just not the endless clutter I seem to have. I am trying so hard, but it does at times seem a losing battle. It's even the little things like my kitchen floor seems permanently covered with crumbs, no matter how much I brush it. The kitchen cupboards have marks - never apparent in other people's kitchens (believe me, I've looked!). I am trying to declutter, but it's an uphill struggle when trying to cope with littleuns as well.
I broke a mug this morning, full of tea that I was so looking forward to. It went everywhere. I sat and wailed. I certainly don't know how other mums cope. So thanks for your post - and you are not alone. Lots of hugs to you.

charlies_mum

icandream wrote: »

Hi all
When I go into their houses, there's just not the endless clutter I seem to have.

I used to visit a friend and her house was always spotless, and then one day I called uninvited - it was a bomb site :eek: Turns out she only cleared up when she was expecting me :rotfl:

calleyw

jw1096 wrote: »

Arrggh - someone shoot me. I spend all day yesterday cleaning and whatnot, and the place is a goddam tip already!

Know the feeling. Mind you does not help with me painting furniture in the back room.

Also does not help that everything in the house needs replacing kitchen, bathroom all carpets and redecorating every where to be done on a budget of £0.00 :rotfl:

Sometimes I hate this house.

Yours


Calley

calleyw

charlies_mum wrote: »

I used to visit a friend and her house was always spotless, and then one day I called uninvited - it was a bomb site :eek: Turns out she only cleared up when she was expecting me :rotfl:

Hands up

Yes that is me if I know I am expecting visitors then I will have a massive tidy up.

As I said before I hate this house. We moved from a one bedroom flat to 3 bedroom house and there is just stuff everywhere. We have more room then before and there is just stuff everywhere.

My husband is home all day as he can no longer work due to medical reasons. But because things take so long as he has only one good arm and hand. Things never get done.

Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Yesterday in his office I just chucked loads of stuff on the floor as I as fed up with seeing it covering every available surface. No better today.

Guess how I am going to be spending my valentines evening. Umm could that be tidy up his stuff.

Yours


Calley