Having a baby Old Style???

Scarlet_Fever

kingshir wrote:

ancasta wrote:

I work for a company that offers good Maternity pay and other benefits such as childcare vouchers.

No doubt what I'm going to say will be generally unpopular but I can't see any point having children just to palm them off to someone else to bring up! You might as well have a dog or cat instead........

I'm not trying to be mean, I just feel the need to speak out.

hi there, you were very brave to post this - (imo) - so well done for being honest....

in my view (as a mum of one and another one due on the 18th Aug), i feel that my son who went into 2 days a week childcare from 6 months, and then full time at one year, has helped him immensly with his communication skills and dealing with other people, he is (currently having a paddy cos i wont let him have some smarties!) a normal well adjusted child, mostly polite (pleases and thanks yous etc) with a calm normal mother because i get 'time out' talking to adults.

I love him very much, but he doesnt need me to be at home all day to be a good mum. I believe that you have to do what is right for you and your child. I am also very lucky that i have a childminder who my husbands family have known since she was herself a 5 year old child, and they adore each other.

My plans for the new one are to go to the office 3 days a week and one day work from home to 3 months then to go to the office 4 days a week and one day work from home to 3 months and then back to normal. (at which point the oldest will be starting school)

gosh that turned into a bit of an essay....

anyway - it would be nice to get some more help from work, some places will pay you your full salary while you are off, while i know that in the US they get 6 weeks paid, so its swings and roundabouts.....


and in answer to the original question.... i would say if you are using disposable nappies, get a sangenic nappy wrapper (normally £30 but quite often down to £15) and you dont need everything else that you think you do...
you will need... changing mat, buggy, car seat, clothes, cot, toys, etc,

Scarlet_Fever

Zziggi wrote:

Within 3 months i was pregnant with another one (and had the same probs) then a month after he was born i was pregnant with dd.

crikey - this must have hit your health quite a lot? i think the current view is that to let your body get back to normal (?) takes 12 months...

on an aside, i have started with Raspberry leaf tea (as am 36 weeks now) and was told by lady in office 'oh you are too late with that' when she had her kids (now 18 and 15) they were told to take it from conception, whereas now its not recommended before 35 weeks as can cause contractions...!!

ancasta_2

OH and I have decided to wait until we are moved into our new house (start sorting that out 25th september) so that if i do fall pregnant straight away im not going to have the hassle of moving drs, stress of moving, lugging and lifting etc etc

maryb

this takes me back and i can so remember when it was all new and exciting.

Some thoughts/tips for what they're worth

there's never a good time to have a baby and you can never afford it so you might as well just go ahead anyway

epidurals are wonderful. most first time mothers seem to say they want to manage without pain relief. most second time mothers just want to know how soon they can have an epidural!!

one solution to the problem of where to put newborn to sleep/should baby sleep in your room or in your bed - use an ordinary cot pushed right up against your bed with the drop side down. baby is safe but it makes breastfeeding in the night much easier.

If you make your own babyfood (and it is worth it) get the Stweart brand of ice cube trays and their bacon storers. the ice cube trays fit exactly inside the bacon storer so it is very easy to store the food once it is frozen

my Gp who was near retirement when DD1 was born recommended me a fantastic cream for nappy rash - the sort they get when they do a really scorching hot poo. it's zinc ointment (NB not zinc and castor oil cream) with 2per cent coal tar solution. get a pot made up at the chemists and it will last you for two babies.

I worked full time with both babies - no choice for financial reasons. in some ways it's easier when they're small as childcare is geared to looking after little ones in a way that you don't get for older children. I fins it is as they get older that you need to be around more and substitute care is no substitute for Mum or Dad

s@sha

Buffyslay wrote:

on an aside, i have started with Raspberry leaf tea (as am 36 weeks now) and was told by lady in office 'oh you are too late with that' when she had her kids (now 18 and 15) they were told to take it from conception, whereas now its not recommended before 35 weeks as can cause contractions...!!

Where do you get this from, and does it actually taste of raspberries? ( I can't bear them!)

Is there much evidence that it works?

It's a bit early for me to start trying to bring on labour yet, but I had a growth scan on Friday & they said baby is already 6lb & measuring as 2 weeks ahead of his dates! I've still got 6 weeks to go, so I really don't want to go overdue if I'm growing a big heffalump baby.

jellyhead

Buffyslay wrote:

crikey - this must have hit your health quite a lot? i think the current view is that to let your body get back to normal (?) takes 12 months...

on an aside, i have started with Raspberry leaf tea (as am 36 weeks now) and was told by lady in office 'oh you are too late with that' when she had her kids (now 18 and 15) they were told to take it from conception, whereas now its not recommended before 35 weeks as can cause contractions...!!

i used it for 4 weeks (35-39) but stopped 2 weeks ago as i'm allergic to raspberry, and i realised the tea was giving me migraine - doh! lol! yes it did cause contractions but they're just tightenings, not proper contractions. unlikely to cause any problems unless you've already got something wrong like you're already going into premature labour. the woman in holland and barrett did say she'd been told to wait until 36 weeks but it says 35 on the packet. with me the tea caused a few braxton hicks half an hour after drinking it, it also kept me erm, 'regular'.

just back from a weekend in southport/blackpool and my bath's running so i'm letting my husband have the computer and won't be clearing out my pm box until tomorrow. if anyone tried to pm me about the baby i went for the sweep on friday and she couldn't do it because i wasn't ready. booked into hospital on wednesday for induction, that's ten days over, our hospital policy but indiction will just be gel to begin with and can take up to 4 days before they get serious and start on the brutal stuff :eek:

Zziggi

Buffyslay wrote:

crikey - this must have hit your health quite a lot? i think the current view is that to let your body get back to normal (?) takes 12 months...

Tell me about it! Symphis pubis & back probs which i'm sure is from having 3 babies so quickly!


ANyway, whoever suggested using face flannels instead of wetwipes made a brill suggestion. I had a load of face flannels in the cupboard and have been using these. Save a fortune on wet wipes - thanks!

carpool72

maryb wrote:

zinc ointment (NB not zinc and castor oil cream) with 2per cent coal tar solution. get a pot made up at the chemists and it will last you for two babies.

My mum used this too but BE AWARE some babies can be allergic to zinc! My sister was & my mum didn't realise for weeks that her raging nappy rash was being made worse by the cream... perhaps best to get a small sample size to try it first.

starlite_2

s&#64 wrote: »

Where do you get this from, and does it actually taste of raspberries? ( I can't bear them!)

Is there much evidence that it works?

It's a bit early for me to start trying to bring on labour yet, but I had a growth scan on Friday & they said baby is already 6lb & measuring as 2 weeks ahead of his dates! I've still got 6 weeks to go, so I really don't want to go overdue if I'm growing a big heffalump baby.

you can buy rasberry leaf tablets from holland and barrets...

Lillibet_2

You can get both the tea & the capsules from Holland & Barretts, I started with the tea but find I don't drink it as I don't like hot drinks plus it tastes of the usual herbal stewed grass (nothing like raspberries) which does nothing for me. I have now switched to the capsules. Midwives do recommend it & I believe there is some evidence in the USA that it helps, plus several hundred generations of south-American Indian women have relyed on it as opposed to modern medical intervention! I figure it can't hurt :rolleyes: