Having a baby Old Style???

donna-j_2

bj-sailaway wrote:

Don't bother with a moses basket contraption, only last a few weeks, use the top of the pram or carrycotQUOTE]

But what if you've been out in the rain and the pram gets really wet?

jellyhead

raincovers aren't too expensive. having said that i find the raincover with the pram my sister got out of her attic really bulky and a complete pain, i couldn't just leave it sat in the shopping basket 'just in case' because it has a thick plastic frame that always sticks out awkwardly and i'm worried about snapping it, she wants the pram back after i've used it. i remember when i had spud the raincover for his pram was much simpler, i could leave it sat in the basket all the time and just whip it out when needed so the pram never got wet. sometimes the nappy leaked though or he was sick etc. so i used to use half of the cosytoes as a cover on the main pram part. the cosytoes zipped apart so you could use just the bottom part of it. that meant if it got wet i could remove it and the pram bit underneath was still pretty much dry.

if i wasn't such an MSE i'd buy another pram, i'm not keen on this expensive bells and whistles contraption my sis has lent me, it's bulky and heavy. spud's pram was fab, it was a hundred or less from mothercare, had lie-back positions, swivel wheels, easy to fold on buses etc. and was suitable from birth right up to school age. we still used it sometimes at theme parks etc. when he was 4 years old and then passed it on to somebody else. i wish i had it back again, not keen on this travel system but still grateful that i've been lent a pram so don't need to buy one i reckon by the time baby's outgrown the car seat (9 months or less is it?) i can get a cheap stroller maybe, sis will probably be pregnant by then.

i bought stuff when spud was a baby that never got used. a cot mobile for example, he hated it, hated anything that made a noise. he liked looking at a hanging mobile above his cot, brightly coloured wooden fishes. likewise the swing, it couldn't be set to swing with making a noise so he hated going in that.

a good buy was the high-chair. i got a wooden one that converted into a table and chair later on, he was still using that for homework at age 6 i think

donna-j_2

ancasta wrote:

<plee to everyone reading>

My original post was not a question as to what everyone thinks is right or wrong about mothers working it was asking other questions about budgeting.

This has been removed from the sticky as people are getting a bit too vocal and !!!!!y about the work/no work so can we all go back and read the original post then reply accordingly.

Thanks muchly.

Ok dokey. I suppose the issues are different though depending on whether you plan to go back to work or not.

We've budgeted for this year, by saving as soon as I got pg, moving our car loan over to the Capital One 18-month credit card, taking our new mortgage over 30 years (we'll change the term once I go back to work).

To put things in perspective we wrote down a years worth of income, taking into account my decreasing maternity pay, and a year's worth of outgoings, to see if we could spread our income across a year and pay everything, including moving house and upping our mortgage.

I recommend opening a 'baby' account now and putting an amount of each salary into it monthly. We've done this and everything baby-related is to come out of here.

Also, depending on how YOU feel about being financially dependent on your OH, think about opening a savings account for 'me money' when you are off. We've agreed that we'll have £100 a month each for social stuff, bus fares etc, but we both also have separate savings accounts. I've put a bit away for if I need a new coat, shoes etc and OH has quite a wad in savings from over the years. Obviously if we need the money for something important then it will go on that rather than fripperies. I think that I am just nervous about being accountable to someone else for every penny I spend and wanted to have 'my money'.

I very much like having the multiple accounts so that I can track what we've allocated to each 'area'. I would have a separate account for each month if I could!

I've bought things as I saw them reduced, used lots of online discount codes etc. I bought most of my Christmas pressies in April while they were really reduced and I still had the money to pay for them without really noticing.

harriet_3

I'm brand new to this forum so bear with me.

My first baby was all planned for and everything organised but my second was so unexpected that the pregnancy wasn't confirmed 'til 4 months.
We really thought we could not aford another but it all worked out in the end and that's more than ten years ago.
You can't always have children to plan.
My point is that somehow it all works out and in the end costs only what you want it to and what you can afford at the time.

Ten years on none of it matters anyway and as long as you love your child and do what really matters whether he wears hand me downs or designer clothes is of no consequence.

bluep

Well said! When I asked my other half if we could afford to start planning for a baby his response was there will never be enough money, enough room, enough time, if you go by them we'd never start a family, lets just be sensible with money and I'd sure we'll get by.

ancasta_2

very well said yourself Bluep

Alex_Bairstow

I'm having a baby OS in about 2 weeks. Hubby and I agonised for ages about whether we could afford it - he's still agonising, I went and told all my friends who immediately went rummaging in their cupboards and donated pretty much everything we'll need for the first 6 months. Other mums are very generous because they learn that baby's grow out of expensive stuff very quickly and so save it for their next one or for friends who may need it - on the understanding that you'll pass it back if it's still serviceable when they need it again. I bought a stroller on ebay for £18 including postage and a baby sling that I intend to use instead of one of these big all singing all dancing pram systems - better for baby as it feels more secure, better for you as it helps get your pelvic floor back in shape and is easier on your back than humping the baby around in a car seat and getting your enormous pram in and out of your boot several times a day - I was a physio before I got involved in growing this baby and can't help but be concerned about peoples' backs! A friend donated a car seat - I was happy to take it because i knew it hadn't been involved in any accidents. Friends also donated maternity clothes - it's easy to spend a fortune on clothes you're not actually going to wear for very long.

I was also given a ton of real nappies that I'm going to have a good go at using - if you're buying them new it doesn't save you all that much money once you've factored in the increased electricity and detergent costs for washing and drying them but it's got to be better than filling up landfill sites with disposables that'll still be there in 100 years time.

Breastfeed, breastfeed, breastfeed if at all possible - it's free and best for you and your baby.

I freaked out the first time I went into a baby superstore and was confronted by the huge range of things that were "essential" for a happy baby, things I never knew existed, how on earth did mums manage before Mothercare?? I quickly realised that the whole shop was geared towards selling me the concept that having the most expensive equipment for my impending bundle of joy was the best I could do for their well being - what a load of b******s. Talk to other mums to find out what's essential and what's hype - everyone has been seduced into buying at least one thing for their baby that has turned out to be completely useless.

If you've been self employed, did you pay your class 2 National Insurance contributions? I'm getting £106 a week maternity allowance for 26 weeks, also once the baby arrives, don't forget to claim your child benefit - it ain't much but every little helps.

Last of all, remember that babies need your love and undivided attention to thrive, not flashy plastic toys that make loads of noise and drive you bananas.

Good luck and enjoy trying to get pregnant,

Alex

ancasta_2

im really struggling to find a pram for tall people. Im 5ft 10 and well over 6ft with heels (i love platform boots ) and im finding it VERY difficult to find a pram/pushchair that is comfortable to push. My OH is 6ft 4 and he finds himself slouching to push them.

We've trawled mama's and papa's, toys r us and mother care just to research heights and what not and we have a bad feeling we might have to pay a bit more to get a comfortable to use item. i plan on doing alot of walking with the pram so a comfy position would be better than being scrunched up.

Flower_Fairy_3

My husband and I are trying to have a baby at the moment, not luck so far but only been trying for three months and I know these things take time and I am trying very hard not to get obsesive and think there are things wrong especially as I had a pregnancey I didn't continue when I was younger.

We are going on holiday in November so maybe it will happen then!

I like the idea of a baby sling too as I hate seeing little babies scrunched up in those car seats being carried around then put on the floor, poor little things!! (only my opinion, I'm sure it will change when I have my own!)

We will be doing it on a budget so this thread has been great for giving me ideas. I will not be returning to work not matter what, I belive my husband earns just enough to enable us to buy food, pay the bills etc. I will sell my car as I shall not be able to afford it, this will also stop me going shopping and spending more money! Things will be tight but I don't want to pay someone else to bring up my children and don't think I am giving anything up by not having a car or fancy holidays, that's not what kids remember.

schoolfundraiser

I'm only 5ft 7 and 14 years ago when my little darling was due had trouble getting a 3 in 1 buggy that was tall enough but found once I needed an umbrella fold one for buses and quick shopping trips it was easier. They do seem to vary a lot and the length of the handles seems to vary from model to model. Keep an eye out in charity and second hand shops as it could be that you are lucky and find an older model that is tall enough A while ago I remember reading about one with adjustable handles but don't know if they still make it. They must be making them as everyone is getting taller now - my 14 year old daughter is 5ft 9. Do you live in an area where everyone is much shorter then you? Areas of the country where people are taller will stock the taller models/ larger clothes/larger shoes etc. My friend has moved to Derby and says everyone is much bigger there and has less trouble getting clothes. Buggies may be the same! Where I currently live dress size 8 is stocked as a norm!

Having read the rest of the forum my advice to all new mums is to listen to all the advice everyone gives you and do what you feel is right for you and your child. Every child is different and something which works for others may not work for you. The health professionals can be a bit bullying at times particularly with a new mum who doesn't have the confidence or backup to argue her case so do your own research and make up your own mind. And YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE A PERFECT MUM - "GOOD ENOUGH" is fine.

Also remember that not all babies are little angels who sleep all the time. Mine was a hellion who refused to sleep until she was absolutely forced to, and whose tantrums lasted until she was about 8 but because we had our battles early on is an angel of a 14 year old. She has her moments but all the hard work and time spent with her during the early years has paid off. But yes she went to a childminder for a few mornings a week at 5 months to give me a break before I killed her and she attended nursery from age 2 on a part time basis. That gave both of us a break and helped me because the nursery staff had trouble with her too and my ego was boosted when I had to tell them how to cope with her. Needless to say we didn't risk having another child!

Finally the other important thing is to enjoy the stage they are at and not keep wishing them on to the the next stage. They grow up so fast that suddenly you blink and they are teenagers. The test of parenting is whether you look back in 20 years and say "we didn't do so badly after all did we?" :A