Giving up pets because of pregnancy

krlyr

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

(obviously where someone has a vicious dog, they shouldn't have it near children at all - but pregnancy isn't the reason for rehoming then, it's being a crap owner and finally realising it)

Aggression in a dog isn't necessarily caused by being a crap owner. I wouldn't necessarily trust my dogs around babies or young kids, not because they're aggressive as such but one has a high prey drive so a running, screaming kiddy might prove too tempting to dash over to (she's great with older kids though), and the other is really bad at reading body language, etc. - in his eyes, puppies are playtoys, not real dogs, so I would worry that a wiggly baby gurgling and babbling away would illicit the same "I want to grab it and shake it and run around with it in my mouth like a teddy!", clumsy-oaf response. Not an issue for me because I don't ever want children, but it could pose a real dilemma in the situation of someone with that kind of dog finding themselves pregnant and wanting to keep the baby. How managable the situation was would depend on various factors - to use me as an example again, my house would definately not be big enough or practical enough to have dog-free zones to make it safe for a toddler to be crawling around.

Not to mention that some dogs do pick up on pregnancy hormones and suddenly exhibit behavioural changes, that's not something you could really predict or plan for.

Not justifying the untrained, unruly dogs that are kicked out because the owner can no longer ignore the misbehaviour and actually has to bother doing some training and providing some exercise but can't be bothered, but I do think there are lots of genuine reasons someone may have to rehome a dog, I don't think it's black and white.

missmontana

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

Despite my mother's pretty appalling hygiene in a house full of children, unvaccinated cats, dogs, rabbits, fish, plus the various bugs and beasties that lived outside, I never came into contact with toxoplasmosis (had immunity test in each pregnancy), never had worms, never caught anything from the animals. I also never got smothered by a cat or eaten by the dogs, despite not being particularly well supervised. (plenty of injuries, some more accidental than others, though).

and you turned out ok eh Jojo?!!!:p

This is why I don't want any more kids, no way I'd give any of the cats up!

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

missmontana wrote: »

and you turned out ok eh Jojo?!!!:p

Well, I meant it more in respect of if anyone was going to get one of those horrible animal-carried diseases, it would have been me. But I didn't (neither did my sister who was on super strength steroid doses for her entire childhood). So it can't be as easy to catch these things as you would have thought by the antianimal brigade's comments.


Wouldn't dream of having my house the state the one I grew up in was, but I certainly didn't lose any sleep over the cat looking at the DDs when they were babies.




[BTW, to the other poster, I did say vicious dogs, not good natured but a bit dim. ]

GracieP

I'm pregnant now and the only worries I have is that one of my dogs will be confused as the baby gets older and both he and the baby have to learn who's toys are whose and that the other dog be waiting and waiting (without luck) to have his turn with the baby so he can groom it. (He adores puppies and will spend hours and hours cuddling and grooming any he can get his paws on.) We got the dogs just after we got married and always new we would want children within their lifetime so prepared them for the eventual arrival of babies from day one. Getting rid of them just isn't an option, they are just as much a member of our family as anyone else. Lower in the pecking order sure but still a much loved part of our family.

I do have to admit though that I am glad my in-law's dog passed on before we had a baby. I would never, ever have trusted it around a baby as she was a jealous little thing who resented anyone showing affection to anyone other than her, especially if my mother-in-law, who was regarded as her own private property. And she could be 'sneaky' and vicious on occasion. Once when we visited with our dogs she was so jealous she would wait until the were asleep on the other side of the room, sneak over to them and bite them hard before running off. I know it's difficult for a dog to accept another dog in their home but watching her sneak an attack on a sleeping creature made me extremely nervous that she would try the same trick on a baby she was jealous of.

I would never, ever have left a baby out of my care in a house with that dog. I know it wasn't the dog's fault, she was a rescue with very ingrained bad habits and was probably loath to accept anything which she feared threatened her happy life with my in-laws. But they were 'lucky' that their oldest children both had problems getting/staying pregnant because if things had worked out differently there could have been 2/3 children while the dog was still alive that would never have been allowed to be babysat by their grandparents.

So the main thing is that if you get a dog you have to account for as much as possible that may happen within it's expected life-span. If you think it's at all possible that you may have a child or perhaps even young grandchildren, neices/nephews, etc that you might like to babysit on occasion within that dog's lifetime, make sure you get one without a past history that may lead to aggression and ensure you are always preparing it for the arrival of children. You can't account for everything but a little planning will go a long way.

con1888

When my sister in law got pregnant her mum was paranoid about the cat and kept telling horror stories. Baby now arrived, the cat ( who was given to them by me so at worse I would have taken it back) has been nosy but never tried to harm baby. She put her paw on him but with claws in and when the baby moved she just ran away. She does sniff at his bottles but generally is no bother. She still cuddles up to brother and sis in law when they are holding the baby.

con1888

Oh and I was born into a family with a dog, big german shepherd who was crazy as hell. She was so protective of us though. When I was 8 and my little brother 3 we got another and she was nothing but protective, used to sit next to his cot when he slept and once my mum has workmen in and she started barking like ma because they came near his cot when he was sleeping.

pawsies

I think it's perfectly acceptable to rehome an animal when you're commitments are elsewhere.

It's far better to rehome the animal to a loving home where it gets what it wants than to 'put up' with a new addition.

Everyone also has different coping levels, it's not right to judge someone on this. I hate this attitude rescues have that everyone who hands in a dog is a bad person, it's not usually true.

A baby is a huge commitment that the dog might not even be able to cope with (which is why you should do pregnancy training with dogs).

lostinrates

con1888 wrote: »

When my sister in law got pregnant her mum was paranoid about the cat and kept telling horror stories. Baby now arrived, the cat ( who was given to them by me so at worse I would have taken it back) has been nosy but never tried to harm baby. She put her paw on him but with claws in and when the baby moved she just ran away. She does sniff at his bottles but generally is no bother. She still cuddles up to brother and sis in law when they are holding the baby.

My mother had kittens from her beloved cat timed to be just after i was born, so they could go through it together. Oe of those kittens eventually chose me, sleeping in my cot and later my bed.


I have two cats now, and mo chilldren, but my friends little boy comes at least twice a week, and they love him and hm them. He has learned to sit very still and is very excited when they sit with him but he is learning to stroke them gently. Initially as a baby he just ruffled their fur in the wrong direction which they patiently tolerated.

They are NEVER left alone, but i know they enjoy each other, and feel he learns from them. I can't imagine how much less happy i woul dhave been without all our animals when i was a child!

Person_one

pawsies wrote: »

I think it's perfectly acceptable to rehome an animal when you're commitments are elsewhere.

It's far better to rehome the animal to a loving home where it gets what it wants than to 'put up' with a new addition.

Everyone also has different coping levels, it's not right to judge someone on this. I hate this attitude rescues have that everyone who hands in a dog is a bad person, it's not usually true.

A baby is a huge commitment that the dog might not even be able to cope with (which is why you should do pregnancy training with dogs).

The fact that dogs live for 10-15 years is not a secret, don't get one if you don't intend to commit that length of time.

Your attitude is exactly the kind we're all complaining about! A dog isn't a car, or a gym membership, or a nice pair of shoes that you can just casually get rid of when they don't fit your lifestyle anymore!

Fosterdog

pawsies wrote: »

I think it's perfectly acceptable to rehome an animal when you're commitments are elsewhere.

It's far better to rehome the animal to a loving home where it gets what it wants than to 'put up' with a new addition.

Everyone also has different coping levels, it's not right to judge someone on this. I hate this attitude rescues have that everyone who hands in a dog is a bad person, it's not usually true.

A baby is a huge commitment that the dog might not even be able to cope with (which is why you should do pregnancy training with dogs).

So what happens when the same people who got rid of the dog for a baby go on to have a second child, what if the children don't get on? Maybe child 1 will be jealous. It would be much safer to just get rid of child one for it's own good in case they don't get on. After all a second child is a huge commitment that the first child might not be able to cope with.

If you take on responsibility for another life animal or child then that is a commitment for life not until it's more convenient to get rid.

A responsible owner will take everything into consideration before even taking on an animal, whether that's future children, further animals, potential job changes and make sure the dog is trained and socialised enough to cope with all eventualities. Therefore there would be no need to rehome them if the situation changes.

Of course there may be extreme situations that change things, complete loss of job with no potential for another, homelessness, death of owner or family member making impossible for another family member to cope, serious illness etc but 99% of animals dumped or handed to rescues are not for these genuine reasons.