R I P My boxer Denzel

tight_scotsman

hi folks
first time on this pet forum just thought i would give my old mate denzel a wee mention. Its 2 years today he passed away and i miss him so much.

He was a big red playfull docile big guy. We brought him up with our 3 kids and they miss him too.

Found him on the floor in the morning although he was 12 yrs old he was very active and never had any health problems.

I suppose it was a blessing that he went like that as i dont think that i could have handled having to get him put to sleep. So i thank him for that.

I was grieff stricken far more than i could ever imagined some people were quite shocked that a 45 yrs old man could take his dog passing away so bad. Must admit i was surprised myself.

We also have a female boxer harley who is now 12 yrs and i can still see the sadness in her eyes im sure she misses him too.

I even have his ashes on top of a unit with his ashes and pictures of him with a wee candle burning.

The reason for this thread is.

Is it normal for a grown man to behave like this?

Has anyone else experienced total grieff and a deep sence of loss.

thanks for taking the time to read mt thread.

Wanna finish on a lighter note

Someone once asked me if i was too choose the dog or the wife who would i choose?

I Replied well here is a test you can do.

First lock your dog and the wife in the boot of your car for 30 mins.


Come back and open the boot.

Then see who is best pleased too see you.:):):)

Superbiatch

I wouldn't be too hard on yourself, I'm currently sat beside my 13 year old staffie who is literally living on borrowed time. He has lost virtually all the use of his back legs and over the weekend we have noticed his breathing has become rather laboured.

He is my OH's dog originally and they have seen each other through many dramas and I think the world of him (I will be sleeping on the sofa with him tonight). But he is 13 years old, has had a wonderful life in terms of a dog and i shall be extremely sorry to see him go. I don't think he has long left in this world and I know my OH will literally fall to pieces (he suffers with clinical depression anyway) and it will be up to me to hold it together so I don't think its wrong for you to still be grieving, our pets hold such fond places in our hearts and I think we should remember the good times. I try to do this everyday when I see him struggling.

God bless you for still grieving and I'm sure somewhere your dog is still looking down fondly at you for giving him a wonderful life x

tight_scotsman

thankyou super

im so sorry to hear about your wee staffie and like my wife you understand losing a pet is like losing a member of the family.

We have so many memories and they are precious.

you hang on in there with him.

my wife has been so supportive and i know she misses him too .

we spend a lot of time talking about the hilarious things he got up too.

it helps to talk so im sure you and your partner will find it good to talk.

hope things are ok through the night

god bless you

zaksmum

Sorry for your loss scotsman.

SpendlessKaren

Sorry for your loss. I lost my 11 yr old Staffy girl in November and know what a horrible sad feeling you seem to continually carry around is like

Fridaycat

It is entirely natural to grieve like you are.

Our Misty cat passed away in my arms at the stroke of midnight on Feb 24th last year (so just gone past the one year anniversary), and I still shed some tears for her from time to time, despite having 5 other cats to look after.

Take care xx

scaredy_cat

i think what makes our pets so special is that they give us unconditional love and ask for nothing in return, so it is an extra special bond - they accept you for who you are, they don't bear grudges if you are having a bad day and shout at them, they don't care what you look like - if you are fat, thin, stunningly beautiful or more homely. I still sometimes have a little cry over one of my cats who died more than 9 years ago.

Dollardog

scaredy_cat wrote: »

i think what makes our pets so special is that they give us unconditional love and ask for nothing in return, so it is an extra special bond - they accept you for who you are, they don't bear grudges if you are having a bad day and shout at them, they don't care what you look like - if you are fat, thin, stunningly beautiful or more homely. I still sometimes have a little cry over one of my cats who died more than 9 years ago.

How very true.

I have had Boxers for many years, wonderful dogs.
Although we love all our animals, they say that there is always one very special one which we will always have a bond with.
My special one, died over twenty five years ago, I've had two of her relations, plus a rescue one since but I can honestly say that there is not a day goes by when I don't miss her and think of her.
She died when she was only 7, she had cancer of the spleen and it burst. I had such a short time with her and the bond was so strong, she knew what I was thinking even before I thought it. She saw me through such bad times and was always there for me. I'm sitting here typing this with tears streaming down my face, I can hardly see the screen and keyboard.
A year or so before she died, she had a stroke and went into a fit. She ended up sedated at the vets for a week, they wouldn't let me see her as they said she needed to be kept quiet and it might upset her to see me. They said she might be brain damaged and were talking of her being PTS. I was having none of it, she had always been there for me and there was no way I was giving up on her. I was even offered another dog, one of her relations, by her breeder but I said I didn't want another dog and I wasn't going to have her come home and think I had replaced her. I know they meant well and didn't think she would be coming home.
I went one day and sat outside the vets, 'talking' to her. I knew she would hear me, as I said, we had such a strong bond and seemed to be on the same wavelength. I told her she couldn't leave me, I still needed her and she had helped me so much that I would always be there for her. That whatever it took, we would get over it. I had an old jumper on and took it in to the vets and asked them to give it to her, she always liked a blanket to scuffle round and make a pillow for her head.
I had been ringing several times a day, hoping for good news and the next day, I made my usual call as soon as I got up and good news, they said there seemed to have been an improvement, they had had her up and walking around, albeit a bit wobbly and she had eaten. They said if she continued to improve, I could fetch her the next day.
When she came home she was quite one sided for a little while and if she tried to get anywhere at her usual speed she fell over and looked puzzled as to why she had ended up on the floor, but she continued to improve and after a month, you could hardly tell anything had happened.
I think it was my taking in the jumper with my smell on it that turned her round, I'm sure the separation of her being in the vets, thinking she had been abandoned was not helping her.
The dog I have now is related to her, the last one I'll be able to have of her line as her breeders don't breed anymore. He is such a lot like her in many ways and I love him to bits but no dog could ever replace her and I wouldn't want any of them to.


Denzel is probably your special one. I am so sorry for your loss and my heart goes out to you.
Don't be scared of still grieving for him, he was part of your family for so long, its like losing a child, I'm sure you will never forget him. Just try to remember the good times you had with him, his funny ways. Although the pain never goes, you get used to it after a while, it softens.
I'm sure that your Harley does miss him too, I'm sure you give her extra love to compensate and when she goes, she'll no doubt be reunited with him at the bridge.

Take care.

rising_from_the_ashes

Dollardog wrote: »

Although we love all our animals, they say that there is always one very special one which we will always have a bond with.
My special one, died over twenty five years ago, I've had two of her relations, plus a rescue one since but I can honestly say that there is not a day goes by when I don't miss her and think of her.

Ohhh Scotsman a huge (((hug))) for you - I agree with Dollar that, although they are all special and much loved, there is always the "one" - Denzel was obviously your one and of course you still miss and grieve for him.

I've had many pets over the years (and sadly lost some along the way - the big downside of sharing our lives with them) I miss them all ....

Ben was my one .... he too knew what I was thinking almost before I did and was the most wonderful companion I could ever have wished for and honestly made me laugh every single day I had him. My only regret was not being able to have him sooner (he didn't have a great life before I got him) or for longer.

It'll be 15 weeks on Tuesday since he went to the bridge ... I don't think I've yet had a day when I've not cried at some point - some days are better and others worse but it's always there. (((hugs)))

Dollardog

Superbiatch - Sorry to hear your dog is poorly, but he knows how much he is loved and has had a good life with you. It doesn't make it any easier though when you lose them. Just give him lots of cuddles while you can.
My regret is that I didn't have the chance to say goodbye, like Rising's Ben, and OP's Denze, she was there and looking good one minute then gone the next.
She came racing through the door one morning, I went upstairs to get ready for work and found her collapsed when I came back down. I rang the vet and took her straight over, he thought it was thyroid trouble as she was on tablets for that, he said to leave her there and he was sure they could sort her out, but she deteriorated through the day and died. It was only when they did a post mortem that they found the tumour in her spleen that had burst.

Rising, I know how much you miss Ben, its awful when you live alone and go back to an empty house. I hope soon that you can find another dog to give your love to, not to replace Ben, as no other dog ever will, but another one to love and be loved. There are lots of dogs out there who would love the home you could give them and I am sure the right one will turn up for you soon, probably when you are least expecting it.

bugslet

I don't think there is right or wrong or normal. In a way it's far better to still hurt than never to have cared deeply whilst he was still being a big daft love of a dog. I believe when I shuffle off I'll be met by my old mutts - well either that or I'm not going!

Superb - hope things go as easy as they can with your staffie.