overwhelmed new member

Coco114

Ha ha I love it HL
My friend just text that she has been sick all morning ......... Karma I think !!
X

Coco114

Tuesday already !!!
Bank holiday weekend is nearly here :T

20p on surveys today .... Slow progress but never mind !
I have yet to post off my mortgage payment (have normally sent it by now) I still don't know what to do for the best - I know that as soon as that payment comes out I am left with nothing again ..... Maybe will have to talk to ex & see what he thinks ? Hmmmmm will have a think about that one

Nothing much to report at the moment - hope the week is going well for all of you. Oh yes & Nationwide haven't responded to any of mycommunication (and it's a huge CC of over £8k) have now passed it on to a DCA "Marston" I think they are called ? Warning me I will get a doorstep visit if I don't pay .... Good luck to them they can join the queue These kind of letters don't even scare me any more !

Right , cup of team time
Coco x

Mr_Toad

Coco114 wrote: »

Nothing much to report at the moment - hope the week is going well for all of you. Oh yes & Nationwide haven't responded to any of mycommunication (and it's a huge CC of over £8k) have now passed it on to a DCA "Marston" I think they are called ? Warning me I will get a doorstep visit if I don't pay .... Good luck to them they can join the queue These kind of letters don't even scare me any more !

I'm glad you're still feeling positive, keep it up. :T

Have you spoken to anyone about getting the interest frozen on your credit card and stopping them from taking things any further?

I think you should speak to Citizen's Advice and at least ask if there's anything that can be done. Once you've explained things to them they may be able to get the Nationwide to freeze things, they don't like doing it but they will if pushed.

Don't speak the the Nationwide yourself, all they will be interested in is getting a payment out of you, even a token one and this just reinforces their belief that you can pay but won't. As you've already discovered they are more than happy to ignore you but won't accept you ignoring them.

I'm sure someone who knows more will be along soon.

Tell the ex to fix and sell your car rather than 'his' car but wait until you've got your hands on it. Tell him you need it to run his children about and to get to work to earn money to feed and house them. I'm struggling to understand how you can borrow something that is half yours in the first place.

As ever, onwards and upwards and keep smiling.

Coco114

Many thanks Masonn - I am remaining positive

In the next couple of days I will put up my income / outgoings & see what you all think - I need impartial advice on where I go from here really because as things stand, I will never be able to start paying unsecured debts off & progress to a Debt Free Diary

Anyway - I am very grateful for your advice & I will try CAB and see what they suggest. Last time I spoke to them (approx 9 months ago) they were making bankruptcy noises ....

As for the car , well it's a short term solution really, it's not worth anything anyway

Thanks again

Coco x

Coco114

0.20 on survey at lunchtime ..... Yawn

Sun is still shining - I love the light evenings !!

Very grown up conversation with Ex this morning. No arguments , no blame no tempers just talking it through. He is unable / unwilling to pay any more towards the house so this is the score :

Salary £1800
Maint & CB £620

Total mortgage , loan , arrears £1100
Bills & CCJ etc £700
Which leaves £620
Petrol about £150
School meals / clubs / hair kids £100

Which (forgetting bdays , dentist , Christmas, car tax & bills etc) leaves me less than £400 a month for food & everything else ......

Now its down in black & White - I can see why I am struggling .....

I can't sell it because of shortfall of at least £20k .... So where do I go from here ?
Answers on a postcard would be gratefully received
Ex thinks I should tell secured I can't afford to pay & let them do their thing - am at the point where I just want it over now tbh.
But - amazingly I am still very chirpy !! Whatever happens is for a reason. I have my 2 amazing (tho very messy) kids & life could be a lot worse !!

Apart from that , it's been a good day :T
I went to make tuna wraps for work today - went to get the Mayo from fridge , turned around & tuna all gone & one very happy looking cat :rotfl:
It's the first treat he has had for weeks lol !

Coco x

Mr_Toad

Coco114 wrote: »

0.20 on survey at lunchtime ..... Yawn

Sun is still shining - I love the light evenings !!

Very grown up conversation with Ex this morning. No arguments , no blame no tempers just talking it through. He is unable / unwilling to pay any more towards the house so this is the score :

Salary £1800
Maint & CB £620

Total mortgage , loan , arrears £1100
Bills & CCJ etc £700
Which leaves £620
Petrol about £150
School meals / clubs / hair kids £100

Which (forgetting bdays , dentist , Christmas, car tax & bills etc) leaves me less than £400 a month for food & everything else ......

Now its down in black & White - I can see why I am struggling .....

I can't sell it because of shortfall of at least £20k .... So where do I go from here ?
Answers on a postcard would be gratefully received
Ex thinks I should tell secured I can't afford to pay & let them do their thing - am at the point where I just want it over now tbh.
But - amazingly I am still very chirpy !! Whatever happens is for a reason. I have my 2 amazing (tho very messy) kids & life could be a lot worse !!

Apart from that , it's been a good day :T
I went to make tuna wraps for work today - went to get the Mayo from fridge , turned around & tuna all gone & one very happy looking cat :rotfl:
It's the first treat he has had for weeks lol !

Coco x

Your in a great frame of mind and doing really well.

Get some proper advice and meet the situation head on. You could struggle on for years living hand to mouth, robbing Peter to pay Paul.

The strain of trying to keep your head above water and everyone happy could take a dreadful toll on your physical and mental well being. You seem to have reached that point where you are ready to face it. Don't let the moment or your resolution pass and fade away.

We're all rooting for you kiddo.

Coco114

Thanks Masonn
I think I know what I have to do and I (think) am ready to deal with it........
If there were an end in sight, 2 months, 6 months etc I would consider carrying on as I am. Sadly, robbing Peter to pay Paul is getting increasingly impossible.

If I rewind 18 months - I would have been grateful to be in the position I am in now - it was really that bad !

Have spoken to Shelter this morning - their advice (very nicely given) was to rent somewhere, hand in the keys and walk away. That wont be the end of it but at least it wont all fall on my shoulders then. Whatever has happened, this isnt just my debt/responsibility..... it took 2 to get into this mess

At the moment - give or take a few ££ I have my mortgage money left (secured already paid) and thats it. Peter, Paul (and indeed Kevin!) arent going to help me this month so my kids are going to have to come first :A

In a weird way, I almost feel relieved now that I have mentally come to terms with losing the house - almost like a new start is around a corner.

I realised how unseriously my ex is taking this when he tried to give me £50 yesterday morning ....... I didnt take it. And if he thinks £50 will sort out my problems he hasnt listened to a word I have said !

Anyway, todays surveys are 0.35 p :T Its nearly a bank holiday weekend so I will get time to catch up with myself.

I do realise that there are a lot of people that loosing a house would, understandably, scare the living daylights out of - but it doesnt scare me - if thats the worse that is going to happen - we will be fine

Have a good day all & enjoy the sunshine.....

Coco x

asparagus1968

Hi Coco,never experienced it myself, but my lovely friend found herself in a neg,equity house,OH did a runner.Both names where on mortgage.She asked about just handing back keys etc and was told she could do this-and the mortgage company would sell the house,for whatever they could,and my friend and ex-OH would still be liable for the shortfall.She sold it herself in the end,and is managing to pay the shortfall off by monthly installments(loan) but feels she got more for it than morgage company would have sold it for.

So,please make sure you know all the facts before doing this!

hope you have a lovely BH weekend.
me and boy off camping(first timers!) that must be why the weather has changed and its now pouring down
take care

Coco114

Thanks for that - I won't rush in
Thing is it's not so much mort comp more the secured loan. If I pay mortgage and drop payments on loan - that will give me some time. It will take longer for sec to take it through the official channels , they told me that themselves - in the meantime , the mort is the same as a decent rent and that is all I will be paying.

When it's done I will agree a shortfall payment on my half & they can take the rest up with my ex. Lots to think about - I thought my resolve would be waning by now but , if anything , it's growing stronger so I need to hold on to that :T

Well at least it will be a MSE weekend as I have no car ! However , there are a couple of street parties & community BBQ in walking distance so we are going to go to them if its nice .... & we haven't finished our scrabble tournament yet - it's very rock & roll in our house :rotfl:

Coco x

Barbeduk

Hi coco, glad to hear we're all living the rock n roll lifestyle! You really need to speak to a debt charity about all this, have someone take the weight off your shoulders. I'm concerned that if you rid yourself of the house, you've got to find the deposit and rent in advance on any new place and you've got no way of saving up for it.

Well I've made a complete b*lls up of he weekend, all of us supposed to be going up to London to camp in a friend's garden but I can't find anywhere to take the dog! So DH is taking the kids and I'm staying home with my 4 legged friend. Still, it saves 2 days kennel fees! And, tbh, DH probably could do with some quality time with them as he's been working so many 6 day weeks.

Enjoy the street parties, I think you should be really proud of the way you're dealing with all this whilst remaining so positive.