Dog help please.....before I lose my family :-(

lilibet1

I didnt want to get a dog when my son and hubby did 5 years ago,i was so against it BUT i know that i get my way most of the time:) so went along with it and boy im so glad i did. We even added another dog to the mix 3 yrs ago. They are my world, I love them so much and although dh and son said they would take care of them, because im a SAHM the responsibilty has fallen on me. Having said that we have 2 jack russells. Springers are an entirely different ball game.

I have changed so much since the dogs arrived, im very OCD dont like dirt, mess etc but the dogs are curled up on the bed with me and do every night. They are my hot water bottles. Having said that i will not take any rubbish off them nor would i off dh or son......

I hope you sort this.

FWIW i prefer my dogs over people most days:) x

GOOD LUCK X

pimento

I think you'd be better off training your husband.

lovesabargain123

Thank you for the replies,all very helpfull.
In answer to some of the questions...
He does not poo when left on his own,he does it occasionally in the morning when we get up( never later than 8am and they get let out about midnight)
They are left in the back room when I am at home 9-3 and they have plenty of toys to keep them busy plus food and water...however they don't eat / drink until they are let out
We got the girl when she was 4mths I think,whatever age it is they leave their mum
Boy we got at just under a year as his owners were divorcing and neither had time for him ( should have guessed then :rotfl:)
I do walk them sometimes with DH and/or kids at the weekend,however during the week he does dogs and I do kids activities again with the feeding he feeds them whilst I clear up after dinner or do the football run etc
I think most people have hit the nail on the head,this problem is the tip of the iceberg in our relationship but we were fine before they came .take today for instance, I've been reading for a few weeks on dog training and said to oh that boy dog was rooting in the in...and him clearing up and telling him off( your a naughty boy you shouldn't do that) an hour later means nothing....get ignored....are you listening DH x 4 ..fgs wife yes...Luther a 2 hour argument erupts.....
Will take on board everything that has been said and work with it thank you
I may result in the dog whisperer,bark busters and husband training all in the same week at this rate

Errata

I'd prioritise the husband training, so good luck. You know the saying 'there's no bad dogs, just bad owners'.

caeler

I'm not an animal person, I've had cats before which was fine but I realise now I'm not an animal person, especially not a dog person. I'm not scared (although don't like being jumped at and barked at but can cope) but if I explained to my OH that I'd prefer not to have dogs for the reasons you have then I'd expect to be backed 100%. I'm sorry that you've been put in this situation and I absolutely admire you for living with you. I can't imagine what it must be like to live with this but it can't be easy. Something has to be done, some lovely users have posted their experience with dogs with I truly hope helps you and I hope your husband obtains the training for your animals. I just wanted to say I wouldn't be able to live with dogs in my home, regardless of training and I wouldn't be able to compromise (I don't understand the affinity people have with their animals which does make me sad).

krlyr

lovesabargain123 wrote: »

I think most people have hit the nail on the head,this problem is the tip of the iceberg in our relationship but we were fine before they came .take today for instance, I've been reading for a few weeks on dog training and said to oh that boy dog was rooting in the in...and him clearing up and telling him off( your a naughty boy you shouldn't do that) an hour later means nothing....get ignored....are you listening DH x 4 ..fgs wife yes...Luther a 2 hour argument erupts.....
Will take on board everything that has been said and work with it thank you
I may result in the dog whisperer,bark busters and husband training all in the same week at this rate

Telling a dog off after it's done the deed doesn't tend to have much of an effect because dogs aren't great at learning to link actions to consequences. Imagine being in a foreign country and someone comes up to you shouting at you in another language. You don't know what you did wrong - maybe you did something that you'd consider normal in England, but that's frowned upon highly in their country, but the timing was off and you don't comprehend the meaning of their words so you have no idea what they're talking about. At best, you ignore them, at worst the shouting scares you and you end up fearful of other foreign people because they're scary and shout at you for no apparently reason.
With dogs, you're better off teaching them what to do rather than what not to do. With binraiding, the most simple solution is to not leave the bin there to raid. Move it inside a cupboard, up onto the counter, into a room they don't have access to, etc. - or buy a dog-proof bin (Wilkinson are cheap for storage bins etc., find one with a lockable lid or at least a foolproof clip system).
I really wouldn't recommend Barkbusters, they're a franchise so anyone can buy in regardless of their knowledge of dog behaviour. The Dog Whisperer, Cesar Milan, uses such old-fashioned cruel methods that I wouldn't go down that route too. Similar to the foreign person shouting at you, his methods just don't communicate with the dog - he believes in pack leadership, alpha rolling, etc. which just isn't a natural relationship between dog and human. Pinning your dog down when he growls at you won't stop the cause of the growling - you may surpress the behaviour in the short-term but if the dog is growling because he is, for example, scared (maybe having been shouted at before), he will just get more and more fearful and eventually snap with a bite, you just can't risk these kinds of training methods in a household with children. The APBC behaviourists will use positive methods that may take a little longer but will change the dog's attitude which results in the behavioural change.

esmy

Our dog raids the bins so we bought something like this for the kitchen;
http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/images/B002DZT5RE/ref=dp_image_z_0?ie=UTF8&n=11052671&s=outdoors
He can't get in it. Don't know where we got it but it doesn't look quite as 'dustbin' like as that one.

thorsoak

"I may result in the dog whisperer,bark busters and husband training all in the same week at this rate"

Bark busters most definitely for the OH!!! A few sharp "shocks" when he transgresses may well do the trick with him

WhiteHorse

lovesabargain123 wrote: »

That's the thing, I'm not sure he does... I know 100% that given a choice me or them, they would win hands down. Unfortunately though the kids love them too and DH has always made a massive issue how 'shouty mum' is always nasty to the dogs

Time to review your whole relationship and then confront him with your conclusions.

jenhug

I'd be tempted to take the dogs to some day time training classes, get them really tuned into you and what you expect of them. Sounds like if you can get them on side you won't actually need your hubby at all! LOL!

We, until recently had 2 dogs. My boy was PTS 2 and a half weeks ago, but I did everything for them, the feeding, the walking, the training. I had total dedication from them. Even on the way to the vet for the final visit, my darling boy refused to walk for my husband on a lead, mummy always walked him, and mummy had to walk him for the last time.

I think you could say perhaps we were a bit too dedicated to each other, but I think dogs respond well to a firm hand and a clear "leader".

Good luck.