Shoud SAHMs be paid?

felicity1

In answer to the original question, no, I don't think sahms should be paid to stay at home - and I say that as a sahm.

I would far rather the government spend the money on funding good childcare facilities for those that choose to return to the workplace, because as they stand, they are wholly inefficient - whoever heard of nurseries closing at weekends? Don't people realise that there are a whole load of workers who work outside the 8-6 bracket, including weekends?

I am also a great believer in living according to your means, when I stopped working we cut back big time on things that I would call 'luxuries' but many of my peers would call 'necessities'.

Janepig

Spendless wrote:

and that is free or do you have to pay cos it's a nursery unit

liney-it depends on your LA, if you lived near me your child would begin in the Sept following his 4th birthday as we only have one intake, so he'd be 4 and 2 months. My DD will be 4 at end of March and in full-time school in Sept, though from what Janepigs just said I might be moving near to her and sending DD all day now

Yup, it's free - it's just a big classroom tacked on to the school with a separate yard and they also have their meals in the classroom so as not to have to go in the hall with the 350-odd other kids (it's a BIG school). Also (luckily) mil is the cook!!! And although it is full-time the days aren't that long for them - the only reason they start so early (8.30am) is because there's an English-medium school next door and they start at 9am so the traffic is a bit less hellish.

Jxx

snoozer

In the paper today it says that ony 1 in 10 women of working age do not have a job and that the number of SAHD's has dropped as well

They also say that the Government has apologised for its statement a while ago that SAHMs did not contribute to the economy.

sherbetpops

~Loz~ wrote:

I have been a stay at home mum, i haven't worked the whole of my childs life, my oppinions were still the same then, i would never expect to gain a wage for looking after my child..

As you are a SAHM then someone obviuosly provides for you, and gives you spends for the things some people class as luxuries, i suppose you may not class this as a wage even though you happily accpept it

It would be of interest if you became a single SAHM how you would provide for your child then? Looking after a child does not just mean caring 24/7 it also means providing, food, water, heating, clothing etc, but then i suppose your husband/partner can provide this, you mearly have to do the caring bit, some SAHM have to do both, and then be called a scrounger for their troubles

Morglin

I've been a working (childless) woman, I've been a SAHM, and I've been a full time working mum.

Being a working mum is by far the most knackering one - I had to work, but used to long for the days when I could keep the house nice, set up my own routine, was answerable to no one, and had time to stop and smell the coffee.........;)

Once I went back to work, I felt like a hamster on a wheel - no time for anything other than the house, family and job.:rolleyes:

So, no, I don't think SAHM's should get paid - they should just relish the time they have now, and brace themselves for the exhaustion that will set in if they ever have to get back into paid work.:eek:

Lin

Karrie

I was with my partner for 12 years. Our son was born and I was diagnosed with PND. To cut a long story short, I split with my partner over my illness. I still suffer from depression but I have ALWAYS worked. Although it was not the life I had dreamt off or planned, my son has been looked after by childminders and an after school club while I went to work. I was determined not to rely on the state or let my illness get in the way. I was determined to keep our roof over our heads. But I tell you something now, if I could go back, I wouldn't go to work full-time, I would spend precious time with my son. Hind sight is a great thing. We need to get family values back and make the cost of living easier.

Carmina_Piranha_3

:rotfl:

as a SAHM i must say that this week after lots of sleepless nights with a poorly baby i have been REALLY glad i don't work. my husband crawls to work exhausted while i crawl to playgroups etc. with the baby but know that i can have a sleep when the baby has his afternoon nap. then i'm feeling okay to look after everyone when my exhausted husband crawls in from work, and he gets a rest. if i had to work too i think this would be really difficult - we'd both be exhausted and grumpy.

Carmina_Piranha_3

we cross posted - i was laughing at morglin's post not yours!

so many points have been raised in this thread, i've just read it all in one go and kept thinking 'but, but, but' to sooo many posts i won't try to quote them.

my toddler is an active one. i'm a stay at home mum who is never at home because he needs nature walks, parks, museums, farms etc. but there are free things if you look for them. we go out every morning (his choice, not mine!!).

the following long post is just about what free or cheap things we find to occupy ourselves during the daytimes - don't read if you're not interested, or are easily bored

your health visitor should be able to provide a list of toddler groups in your area. it's not my first choice of social life really but needs must. the baby needs to play and i can't afford the wacky warehouse every day. church toddler groups cost less than a pound and for that you get to stay warm and dry and they get some exercise. you get an all-you-can-eat extravaganza of tea, squash, biscuits, toast etc. for less than the cost of one coffee if you went to a play centre.

you could find a toddler group for every day of the week. or you could invest in a waterproof coverall and go for a walk in the rain/snow. a baby in a pram can be covered by the raincover and it's only you who gets wet for the cost of a £3 dayrider bus ticket for me (baby is free) we can go for miles to canals, farms, fields with cows, cannock chase, adventure playgrounds with picnic areas, etc.

swimming is £2.80 for me and free for the baby.

libraries are free so you could just curl up with some books in the library. when we go we also visit the art gallery and have half an hour in the sensory room (all free). you could also nip to the early learning centre and play with the display toys :rotfl:

libraries have free half hour weekly sessions of 'baby bounce and rhyme' for all ages from newborn up to when children start nursery. you sing nursery rhymes with actions, puppets etc. for half an hour. a few rounds of 'hop little bunnies' burns off a few calories

if i were paying for franchise activities such as tumble tots and jojingles then maybe i'd feel that staying at home was very expensive, but i manage it on the child benefit money.

lebly

as a SAHM i must say that this week after lots of sleepless nights with a poorly baby i have been REALLY glad i don't work. my husband crawls to work exhausted while i crawl to playgroups etc. with the baby but know that i can have a sleep when the baby has his afternoon nap. then i'm feeling okay to look after everyone when my exhausted husband crawls in from work, and he gets a rest. if i had to work too i think this would be really difficult - we'd both be exhausted and grumpy.

by carmina piranha

SLEEP WHATS SLEEP! Enjoy my husband and I both have bags big enough to go on a round the world trip! Youngest to old to nap in day now!

lebly

hmmmmm room (message) 101!!! (thats what it says on the tin inside different!)