No T Words mentioned at all - a fresh start

LaineyT

Glad to hear that you have had such a fab day Lyn, have never visited Salisbury myself but do love a cathedral city.

Am a bit miffed to say the least, DM has received two letters from the local surgery where she has been temporarily having blood tests etc following her initial review when she moved into DB's. One document was a DNR confirmation which was fine as all has been discussed but the other was a summary of her condition etc which included the possible time frame :(:( after we have been so careful to fulfill her wishes to not know and they turn round and just send it to her like that! She just handed it to me and pulled a face, we didn't really have time to talk as more friends of hers called to visit but could tell by her face how upset she was. Have been on the phone to her palliative team this afternoon asking if this was the norm and the community nurse is raising a complaint. My poor darling Mum, my heart hurts so for her.

pollyanna_26

Lainey love my heart hurts for you all . That is beyond belief after the care that has gone into keeping your mums spirits up . The candle is burning away as I type and you are all very much in my thoughts .
love polly x

candlelight_2013

Oh Lainey, I am so sorry, as if your Mum doesn't have enough to cope with, and it was her explicit wish not to know of any time scale.

Sometimes people can be so insensitive without realising but they should have checked their records for any instructions.

I know you must be hurting for your Mum as well, and unfortunately the knowledge your Mum has now cannot be forgotten.

I am so sorry for you all and sending gentle hugs and much love

Candlelightx

pollyanna_26

Haven't figured out how to add to a post yet and a bit after the horse has bolted but would mum be willing to have these mailings sent to another family member from now on . Too late for your poor mum now but hopefully the complaint will save it happening to a vulnerable person again . I'm fuming on behalf of you all . Take care love
polly x

Floss

Lainey, big hugs for your mum and you, that wasn't a pleasant piece of post to be opened. Pollyanna's suggestion is a good one.

Am so pleased that your DM is enjoying her social activities

[Deleted User]

Poor Mum, poor Lainey how sad like a loss of innocence and now you have the knowledge in your heads there's no gainsaying it. I pray for you all to be given the strength to accept and the grace to enjoy every second of precious time that is gifted you together and whatever your beliefs or non beliefs I pray that there is 'after life' and that in the fullness of time in that next step you will be united again and together in love and caring always and forever xxx.

LaineyT

Thank you my friends, we realise that there is nothing we can do to take that knowledge away from DM now, what we can do is raise the issue so hopefully another patient doesn't have to go through the same?
Not sure if legally we would be allowed to have Mum's post forwarded through to one of us, she is completely of sound mind after all x

pollyanna_26

Lainey you would have to check but as far as I'm aware your mum can decide to have her post sent to another close family member .
polly x
Maybe the nurse could clarify that point .

LaineyT

Thank you Polly, will have a chat with Mum tomorrow and see how she feels, thanks again for the good idea x

scottishminnie

Lainey - I'm so angry for what has happened to your mum. As the others have said nothing can wind that clock back sadly and i can't begin to imagine how you will keep mums spirits up.:(

I know what everyone means about people's moods just now. I seem to flit between feeling really angry and utterly despairing about things. The news today that a vindictive,spiteful individual is ignoring the wishes of the Scottish people and forcing another referendum is really the final straw. I just don't want to be part of this country any more. I was told yesterday that my department at work is structuring and we will all have to reapply for our jobs. We should know the week before Christmas who hasn't been successful.

Hubby and I planned to emigrate some years back and my parents put every possible obstacle in our way before finally pulling the guilt trip, by which time they'd beaten me down. I've never forgiven myself for not being stronger and the anger at myself is just adding to everything else. This is truly the only place I can come and feel safe with normal people.

Gosh, I need to go off and give myself a shake I think before I have everyone putting their heads in a gas oven:o

On a bright note - my blender arrived from Lakeland. I follows Lyn's recommendation and it certainly looks sturdy and just the job. Will try it out at the weekend.

Is it really bad to have a gin and tonic on a school night?!