Child with Behavioural difficulties

Danni79

My child has had behavioural problem for many years and i have been told i can get some form of benefit to help me with our situation, I am aware that DLA covers children with behavioural problems but i am not sure if you have to have a diagnosis, to date my child has not received this after various appointments with CAMHS - he was dismissed, i am fighting very hard to get him some support and i am in the process of trying to get him statemented at school, His GP has said it can be anything from depression to general bad behaviour and the only support they can offer me is an appointments with CAMHS (i've had 6 appointments since he was 4 years old and he is 11 now - both have signed him off saying his behaviour will improve with age)
My child suffers from very bad mood swings which often result in him being violent towards other and has led to 10 exclusions from school, he has a one to one worker attached to him. His outbursts are unpredictable and can he can become out of control, his school often contact me to collect him as he is becoming a danger to himself and others. He has a jekhl and hyde personality and can be very happy one minute then can become very argumentative and violent, verbally abusive etc.. He has attended a school to help him deal with his emotions but this was temporary and only lasted 3 terms he is now back in main stream school.
I work 3 days per week and as i often have to leave my job to collect him its having an impact on my role, i am not planning on leaving my job but have had to change my hours so i can accommodate school hours as he has been excluded from out of school club due to his behaviour - he was told he could return when his behaviour improves.
He suffers emotionally and socially and we often find as a family we are dealing with situations surrounding my child, whether its dealing with sibling fights or just his general tantrums (which result in him puching and throwing furniture).
I have also been informed that he would be entitled to cinema tickets etc to help him socially but no one i have spoke to knows who i get in touch with,
Any advice is appreciated

DorsetGirl_2

If he has care or mobility needs that you wouldnt expect in a child that age then you could be entitled to DLA.

Danni79

He can care for his own personal needs (when reminded), but i do have to spend a lot more time dealing with situations that he has created, have time off work for meetings, dealing with his exclusions etc.. All our family times have to be organized so there is not a lot of people for him to contend with, family parties are very short as if he spends a long time in big groups he ends up causing arguments and becomes violent.

I know we have to spend more time dealing with him that any other normal 11 year old but he has no diagnosis.
The cinema tickets etc would be beneficial to us as we could take him and his friends out to help him with his social skills but just not sure who to contact or if this comes as part of the DLA claim.

skintandscared_2

My nephew used to have periods of being completely uncontrollable and we finally realised it was worse after eating sugary foods or eating certain things with red or orange food colouring in. A can of Tango would turn him into a monster!!! Not attempting a diagnosis at all, and it's just a suggestion, but try making a note of what your son has eaten or drunk before particularly bad periods of behaviour. Our realisation changed all our lives for the better and we even laugh about it now.

Wishing you the best of luck with a diagnosis - it must be very hard to live with for all of you.

kidcat

http://www.ceacard.co.uk/

You would need to be claiming DLA for your son in order to qualify I think.

IMO its worth your trying to apply for DLA as his care needs seem to be much more than those of a child his age. But you would need some supporting evidence - doesnt necessarily have to be CAMHS. My son is 7 and I receive DLA for him, I used his OT reports, Ed Psych reports and school wrote a supporting letter.

If CAMHS are not helping are you getting any help from the ed psych?

Danni79

I've done the food diary thing before, to be honest he can have an outburst first thing on a morning before he has eaten anything,
He hasn't seen anyone other than his GP, CAMHS, a play therapist as, his school will write a supporting letter i think, Don't mean to sound thick here but whats a OT report, its probably very obvious?????
I might DLA they can only say no can't they???
His behaviour difficulties have been going on since he started school and seem to be getting worse, I got told to try DLA years ago but with being told his behaviour will improve with age i didn't see the point, but i can't see him getting any better at the moment especially when he is getting no support from professionals,

Dognobs

So how will the extra money help your naughty child?????

Danni79

It would help to compensate for the money i am loosing when i have to leave work - its sometimes not possible for me to make back the time as no one will care for all 3 of my children at the same time,
It would help towards taking him out with his friends - i know not all outings cost money but he is at an age where everything he wants to do does,
he is also into music and his behaviour is greatly improved whilst he is focused on this type of activity- the extra money could go towardds lessons of extra activities ie clubs etc plus travel costs as i don't drive.

Dognobs - my child is not 'naughty' as you put it, he has no control over his behaviour, if he was just naughty i think my life would be some what simplier

Prinzessilein

To claim DLA you will need to show that his care and/or mobility needs are greater than those of a 'typical' child of his age. This may be difficult. It could be argued that at 11 many boys are somewhat aggressive and certainly they fight with their siblings!

You state that he has been excluded from school 10 times. Over what period and how long were the exclusions? If the 10 exclusions were over the whole of his school life so far (so, about 5 years?) and include those times when you are asked to collect him early then it is totally different to 10 exclusions this school year - especially of any of those were permanent and necessitated a change of school? Do you see how you need to be specific with stating his needs?

Do you have a partner? Even if you no longer live together? I was wondering if they could help with picking up your son so it isn't always you leaving work - and you can still always pick him up on days that you aren't working.

Make an appointment to see the SENCO (Special Needs Coordinator) at his school and check on the progress of the Statement of Needs. Sometimes you need to push a little!

And finally, make sure you have firm boundaries on what is acceptable at home. This will benefit all of your children, not just the oldest lad. If you do have a partner, it is vital you are consistant in your behaviour management.

DorsetGirl_2

Ignore Dognobs OP

OT = Occupational Therapy.

What kind of support does he get at school, and has he been seen by an Ed Psych?

DorsetGirl_2

Have you applied for a Statutory Assessment (in order to get a Statement) for him?