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Custody release?
Comments
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helzbelz_57 wrote: »sorry but if you think what you are saying is 'supportive' then you are mistaken. it is very closed minded of someone to think shouting and throwing more abuse at an abuse victim is the way to help them change their situation. domestic volience is a hugely complex thing and affects all people differently. this is likely to be a hugely stressful time for the OP and no doubt she has conflicting thoughts tormenting her all her waking hours. ease up on the name calling eh?
That's not abuse. It's the bald facts.
If you look at DV in a 'normal situation' it's about power; the abuser believes he has the right to behave like that and that the victim deserves it. Then often when pulled up on it by someone else, tears, hugs, gets the victim to agree to never bring it up, promises to get help for this anger that they simply cannot help, etc, etc.
In this situation, the abuser thinks he has the right to behave like that - but it's due to a mental illness/condition instead. Then, when faced with possible consequences, tears, hugs, don't bring it up, promises to get help, because it's all this terrible illness's fault, etc.
Having known plenty of very ill people that wouldn't dream of hurting their loved ones - and would make damn sure they took their medication to ensure it never happened if it had been a possibility - it sounds like the OP is very unfortunate to be with someone very ill AND violent AND an extremely skilled manipulator.
Frankly, I wouldn't be surprised if the OP ends up in the papers as one of those rare people killed by someone with a serious mental illness/one of those common people killed by their partner who then pleads not guilty by reason of insanity.
That's not abuse. That's fact.I could dream to wide extremes, I could do or die: I could yawn and be withdrawn and watch the world go by.Yup you are officially Rock n Roll
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it was the poster's tone and perhaps delivery of the facts that came across as abuse. calling her crazy and a fool? that isn't helpful. not at all. for someone who is constantly having their self confidence bashed by an abuser, hearing that they are crazy and a fool from someone who claims to be supportive is not going to help. surely you can see that? it's reinforcing the abuser's justification for the abuse. if OP is hearing that she is stupid (not saying she is in this case) on a daily basis then how is calling her a fool helping?"it's better than a poke in the eye with a pointy stick" - my dad, regularly throughout my childhood when I complained about something being too small/not perfect/not tasty/not what I wanted. he was right every time.0
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I wish you both well...life is hard..It is nice to see the value of your house going up'' Why ?
Unless you are planning to sell up and not live anywhere, I can;t see the advantage.
If you are planning to upsize the new house will cost more.
If you are planning to downsize your new house will cost more than it should
If you are trying to buy your first house its almost impossible.0
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