Supervisor being horrible about having time of with toddler (Long)

liney

I though you had a toddler. Why were you off the previous 8 years?

Seriously, people have given you the links to the relevant sites, and expressed their opionions of which you haven't conceeded one point.

If your boss has the hump, then i would try and pacify him by making special efforts not to take time off unless absolutely required. IE making all appoints outside of work where possible; are they really all at the hospital?

As posted before, i do have a child. I do understand...... to a point.

cruella_de_vile

sexy_fufu wrote:

Yes if i do it.

which i do every week.

if they wanted me to make the hours up using my overtime i would do it.

Why not suggest it to them?

CFC

Sexy Fufu, you say you don't take the michael, yet you're considering going off sick when you're not sick yourself in order to look after your child? As an employer I would consider that taking the !! and you are likely to find yourself the recipient of disciplinary action should you do it and your employer find out.

As for your child being sick, I do sympathise as it's very very difficult for mothers, especially single mothers. However, speaking as an employer, I would say that 10 occasions in a year is too much, especially as you are not entitled to time off for dependants for routine appointments, but only for emergencies. Time off for dependants is to deal with an emergency and to give you a day or two to arrange care.

It's not that any employer is saying that it's YOUR fault your child is ill, what the employer is saying is it's not THEIR fault, so why should their business suffer? You may respond that the government want mothers to go to work, as an employer my answer is that I don't care, unless the government make me give you this time off, my business is not going to do so. You might say, 'well what am I supposed to do when my child is sick', and my answer will be as an employer, 'sorry, I can't advise you what to do about your home affairs, but it's causing a problem for me and you need to find a solution'.

You may be able to use your overtime in order to make up your missed hours, but that's going to depend on your employer. If they need you there to answer the phone and do admin, for example, it's no good being able to answer the phone out of office hours. It wouldn't affect things so much of course if you were in the kind of role where you could work more flexitime.

You do have the right to *request* a flexible working pattern, however this actually is a misnomer as you will still have to agree a fixed working pattern for your week and stick to it, eg. 8-4pm so it still won't help for sick children or hospital appointments.

Actually if your boyfriend moves in with you and takes some responsibility for the child, he will be able to take unpaid leave for dependents for your child in the same way as you. However of course the same circumstances apply, you couldn't take two days dependent leave and then he took two days, so it won't help you out.

I do sympathise on a personal level, and you may feel that this present supervisor is wrong in his attitude, however your employer may feel that your previous supervisor was too soft. It sounds as if you resent him, as you say he's ONLY a supervisor. He's your boss, and he has his own boss above him telling him what to do. Realistically your best option is to find an employer that offers a different pattern of work,and that can hopefully offer flexitime.

Prudent

Suggesting you do some overtime unpaid may be a good way forward. I do take quite a bit of time for appointemnts for my daughter, but work way over my contrcatual hours without overtime quite often. I never complain about this, so feel the good will things is two way with my employer.

daphne_descends

I manage a small office of staff, two of whom are mothers with young children.

I am not sure exactly how much time/how many days either has had off for appoinments etc - I do not keep a log of this. This is a choice I have made in light of their work and the environment here. Even if I did keep a log, I cannot imagine pulling them up on it.

They both know they can have time off when they need it, the last thing I would want is for one of them to feel guilty about it. They appreciate my flexibility and in return I appreciate the good working atmosphere and having happy staff.

I am pretty certain neither has ever taken the !!!!, I don't need to check up on them - for goodness sake it's not like they choose to spend time in doctors surgeries or that they are happy when their children are sick!

As I type this, one of these women hasn't made it to the office yet - her son's nursery was closed (because of the snow) and she's sorting out some alternative arrangements. I know she'll be in soon, and I know when she does she'll be more apologetic than necessary and will probably offer up half a days holiday. I'll tell her there's no need and that she can make up the time over a few days whenever she is able to.

I don't like boss/staff relationship to be about power, or strict rules, the staff in my office are all adults and as such can be trusted with their own timekeeping.


Anyway, in a nutshell, I'd go to the supervisor's boss, the buck doesnt' stop with your supervisor after all. Hope you can find some resolution to this and that your toddler gets better soon - something I bet that is more likely to happen when they have their mum's around them!

sexy_fufu

liney wrote:

I though you had a toddler. Why were you off the previous 8 years?

Seriously, people have given you the links to the relevant sites, and expressed their opionions of which you haven't conceeded one point.

If your boss has the hump, then i would try and pacify him by making special efforts not to take time off unless absolutely required. IE making all appoints outside of work where possible; are they really all at the hospital?

As posted before, i do have a child. I do understand...... to a point.

AND LINEY (do you have a problem reading) i said i worked for the company for 8 Years... I suggest maybe a stronger pair of glasses or if you havent got anythink pratical to say dont bother.

And to everyone elsa thanks for your comments i will take them on board.

I actually found a good site, which covers everythink i need if anyine elsa wants to have a look this is it.

http://www.dti.gov.uk/files/file11419.pdf

Its def given me the answers i am going to print it out and show work.

liney

Sorry, i must have misread it as i was trawling through the inconsistencies.

I need glasses, not a hearing aid though. Have a nice day!

iceicebaby

The link you have posted sexyfufu shows what is able to be done for emergencies. this does not cover hospital appointments that you already know about. Also says the time off is to arrange care for a child who is ill not to necessarily be with the child the whole time they are ill

As long as you are aware of this when you show your employer.

Good luck with the meeting with your employer x

sexy_fufu

Ice, For hospital appointments you can take off paternal leave

please see

http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Parents/Workingparents/DG_10029416

As long as you give yor employer 21 days notice, so therefore i can use that for any appointments i have.

And then if she is ill i have 1-2 days to find someone to care for her.

Well ive had 2 days off im going in tomorrow, ive found someone to care for her tomorrow. and im going to show my boss this.

so now it looks like im quite in my right..

But i think its wrong if your child as chicken pox you have to palm them of on someone elsa.... who is going to look after a child with chicken pox being realistic....

anyway i suppose that isnt my employers problem, yet the government wants all us to work, we cant win really can we !!!!

sexy_fufu

When you know about the problem in advance

The right also doesn't apply if you know about the event in advance. For example, if you want time off to take your child into hospital in a week's time the right doesn't apply.However, if your child is under the age of five (or 18 if he/she is disabled), you may be able to take it as parental leave instead. You'll need a year's employment with your current employer to be eligible for parental leave.

from direct gov website.