MOOLOO'S continuing saga Part 4

Savvy_sewing

I have to confess that the relief I felt coming home from Nursery was substantial. DGD has gone to nursery till 12.
Freedom!. Time to do some housework, that will not be undone behind me as I go along. But first it was pay the bills etc, and try and get some focus.
I went to Mr T to get bread and bananas. Actually bought rolls instead. Realised that we hadnt had any rolls in ages, so nice change, and only 35p. Bonus.
I also picked up some postit notes so that I can try and organise the "to do's" a bit better.
I caught up with the washing last night, even the washing up and hoovered the front room before I went to bed. Not sure where I got the energy from. More from feeling so claustraphobic by my/her mess. thought that if I came down to a cleaner kitchen etc it would feel better. And it did.
The post has just arrived and before I have a look at that, I must just go and sort out the rent. I forgot to pay it afterall last weeK.eek.
I really must sort that out.
Mind you once the benefits all change, most of it will be covered. Except for the "payback" of the benefits that were overpaid once upon a time. They are taking that back at around £10 a week.
But once its sorted out, I will be able to put that on the DD and not worry that they take it out monthly. Or so I am hoping if things all go to plan.
Dispite leaving a message for the Solicitor she didnt get back to me.
So thats another on the todo list.
See I think of these things as I start to write on here.
Now all i need to remember is to do the jobs! Time to go.

Savvy_sewing

Well I do not know where the day has gone. I have been on the go all day, with telephonecalls, websites and bill paying etc etc.
I finally tracked the solicitor down. She is confident that things will be finalised on Tuesday unless the father of DGD suddenly puts a spanner in the works. She hasnt had anything further from the courts. She advised me to get all the paperwork/forms etc ready for the Childbenefit and child tax credits sorted so that they can be posted off immediately if necessary on Tuesday.
I have been phoning to the various offices to get these. I would have downloaded and printed off except I have run out of A4 paper!. DGD has a habit of helping herself to it for drawing on.
Oh well its all done now.
I have a stinking headache and I am not sure if its the new glasses, the cold, or just the tension from it all!.
Cannot take anymore medication. Hopefully my normal tablets will kick in and make a difference. I took them late as I actually couldnt remember if I had taken them or not and so I waited. But then realised that I was going down hill so rapidly that I obviously hadnt, so I took them about 30 minutes or so ago.!

I did nip out for an hour just to have a bit of a break and to browse the charity shops as i do, because I felt so claustrophobic in the home. I probably bought things that I do not need, but as usual the fabrics spoke to me. Mind you one Pillowcase I bought, was a single one in a shop I dont normally go in, £1. But it actually matches a set of 2 others that I already bought for the applique patterns a while ago. So that was a jump out and buy me moment. I also picked up a couple of books. Dont normally look at the books, but am short of relaxing reading material. Most of my stuff is sewing or self help, or financial. There is only so much of the latter two I can read at any one time.
My voice will probably be gone by tomorrow. I am wondering if I will be well enough to take DS and Twin2 into town, and go to my councilling session. I hope so. But we will have to see. Will not worry about it until tomorrow. I will be up early enough anyway taking DGD to nursery.
Time to start cooking the evening meal already. Doing some mince tonight. Bought the smartprice mixed pork/beef mince from Mr A to try. Be interesting to see what that does to the flavour of the meal, but as DGD wants bolognaise, I am sure we will not know much difference if any.
Did I tell you that I did the 10% cheaper challenge yesterday.? I already had bought my shop on a MSE Challenge to downshift to Smartprice stuff. Well I got a voucher off my next order for £2.32
Well the washing I had done over night with thier powder was terrible. The clothes had not come clean at all. Especially DGD's chocolate mousse hadnt come off the cushion cover she spilt it on, her socks looked as dirty and so did a pair of pj's trousers that she had gone outside in! Dont ask.
anyway I picked up the phone to complain that it was not good. Couldnt get through on the phone number on the box, so rang the Customer services for the delivery. They have refunded me the cost of the powder. £3.36. Not a lot but it means that I can go and get some other powder tomorrow. No more cheap brands this time. I will have to buy better as her stuff is getting too badly stained and I cannot afford to have to change her clothes before time. So dearer washing powder it is from now on.
(and no washing tonight until I get better powder).
I suppose nothing ventured nothing gained.
Time to cook. x

gizmo111

Aldi washing gel is cheap and really good.

Savvy_sewing

Just caught up on some adult TV. I have still got the snuffles and the sneezes and a rudolph nose now.
Gizmo I shall try that next time I pop into Towcester there is a new Aldi just opened there last month.

Did ask the solicitor about legal aid for a divorce, but they are not taking on legal aid at the moment. Alas. She said that as its over 5 years, I could actually just apply to the courts myself, but I would need to pay the court fees. She didnt know the actual amounts now, as she hasnt been on that side of the business but it was around £350 odd several years ago. So not something that I can afford at the moment. I shall just have to wait a bit longer.

DGD has been a bit upsy daisy today. She was tired and finally was asleep by 8pm. I hope we will get back into a better routine again soon. I will see about booking her into the Holiday club next time. She really has been a challenge and I think its because she has not had her peers to play with etc. She is bored if I am not keeping her occupied and of course with all that has been going on thats been difficult for me to do sometimes.
This next few days are going to be busy. Tomorrow I am Taxi driver, and going to my councilling. But on Thursday I am having my hair done. Not sure its something that I should be paying out for at the moment, but I really feel a mess and do not want to look that way in court on Tuesday.
Friday I am back looking after DGD2 as well. So I also get to see my eldest, Biggest of Mooloo's. Its not long now before she has her babies BBQ here. I hope the weather has a miraculous change for May!.
I go on holiday soon too. The Sun caravan/camping holiday I booked with the tokens. So I will need to think about that one as well. Sort out some clothes etc for DGD as well as for me, and to do a menu plan to take food with us from the cupboards as well, to save spending on site where its usually very expensive.
Starting to look forward to the break after all the hassles.

I ended up being a push over again today! Both twins "needed" money. One I was not sure what for, shes the one on the holiday! and the other one is having rediculous problems with her electric and she was not sure why but she was down to emergency level at 42p left, dispite putting £10 on yesterday, it didnt even rid the emergency? only gave her £1.49 worth of electric. So there must be something thats being taken off of her account but I havent a clue what. I will have to try and phone the company when I see her tomorrow. See if we can get to the bottom of the problems. its just never ending. But I should be getting used to it all now.
One day someone will be there to help me pick up the pieces. Meanwhile I will just have to battle on.
Night I think.

Eager_Elephant

If you have a low income you are exempt from the court fees for the divorce - you just need to complete EX160a and take down with your proof of income.

Horace on MG's thread is doing her own divorce so maybe you could PM her - I'm sure she would not mind.

Yesterday was my first day back at work for 2 weeks so it was a bit hectic but my benefits book I checked says that Special Guardianship Allowance should be disregarded in full so I wonder if it is the Working Tax Credit which is pushing it over the limit hence why you are not entitled.

Once you have SGA if you claim Income Support it is only payable up to when the child is 5 so as DGD is 4 (I think) then you might not have long on it so might be best to stay with ESA.

Let me know if you have any questions.

Savvy_sewing

Eager_Elephant wrote: »

If you have a low income you are exempt from the court fees for the divorce - you just need to complete EX160a and take down with your proof of income.

Horace on MG's thread is doing her own divorce so maybe you could PM her - I'm sure she would not mind.

Yesterday was my first day back at work for 2 weeks so it was a bit hectic but my benefits book I checked says that Special Guardianship Allowance should be disregarded in full so I wonder if it is the Working Tax Credit which is pushing it over the limit hence why you are not entitled.

Once you have SGA if you claim Income Support it is only payable up to when the child is 5 so as DGD is 4 (I think) then you might not have long on it so might be best to stay with ESA.

Let me know if you have any questions.

Thanks EE. Thats what I had thought. (although the directgov. site says 7 still).
I will more than likely be dropping the Working Tax credit side, by no longer being self employed as a Foster Carer. I had thought about the idea, Mentioned earlier, sorry cant remember who at the moment, about turning my hobby into a full blown business, but as I think its come up before, the new rules for self employment mean it has to be a viable business, and so at the moment its definitely not as so much gets in the way, therefore I will leave that until she is at school, and things have settled. Especially with the twins, and my health. But never say never and I may try again in the future. I will just do the odd bit of sewing for a hobby/pin money at the moment.

Re the divorce, I will investigate that one as soon as I know what benefits I end up on! Thanks. I didnt know you could apply on your own until yesterday.
We learn something every day.

Eager_Elephant

Mooloo wrote: »

Thanks EE. Thats what I had thought. (although the directgov. site says 7 still).
.

Sorry Mooloo I jumped ahead of myself a bit - the change to the age of the child to 5 is from May 2012 for new claimants (others already on it will be phased out over a few months) which is only 2 weeks away which is why I mentioned it as by the time you have made a new claim after the SGA has been sorted we will be in May.

Savvy_sewing

Eager_Elephant wrote: »

Sorry Mooloo I jumped ahead of myself a bit - the change to the age of the child to 5 is from May 2012 for new claimants (others already on it will be phased out over a few months) which is only 2 weeks away which is why I mentioned it as by the time you have made a new claim after the SGA has been sorted we will be in May.

No thats fine. It would be a challenge to get back onto ESA anyway, they would then want me to do jobseekers and really as I am not that fit, and with the stresses etc and all the demands on me, I would probably not be able to go out to work. Setting up a small business would be my only option to be able to work at home around the complexities. But as I would need to make a huge amount of sales to cover all my costs, its not a cost effective business and I would be totally exhausted.
I think that cancelling the Tax Credits, and re applying/re assessing on the ESA as income contributions I would be better off. This would pay housing and council tax benefits, and although I would have less cash in my pocket, if they agree the ESA I will be not so far off what I have been on in the long run.

The system is a nightmare to get my head around, but I think with all the help, thankyou, I am getting there.
The only real fear once this is all been investigated is that there will be a delay on funds coming in for the month of may possibly into June. But they would be back dated to the date of the claim. (Hopefully its Tuesday), so I have made the decision that I will have to just use the funds that have been set aside for DGD, and pay them back when the funds do eventually come in.
Things will be tight. But then what has been the norm for me of the last 4 years, but the ups and downs of the system, where I have had nothing, then something, then nothing etc etc etc.
So if anyone can work through it all, keep a clearer head, and not panic. In the long run, that person really has to be me.:D:o

I have my councilling today. Its a very wet and windy day out there, and I have promised to drive DS and Twin2 into town for thier various Jobcentre and Job assessment interviews. It will mean that I will have to hang around for about an hour before I have my councilling. Not the best of weathers to be lurking in towncentre. (Pity its not MK). So I may just take my book, and spend a little bit on a cuppa in a cafe for once.
Twin2 will also have to hang around, so thats two cuppa's then.
But she will have to have funds for the bus back, as her appointment starts as I have to come home for DGD. The time is too tight to hang on for her. But I would have had to give her bus fare to get there too, so I can at least spend a bit of time with her, away from the mess and the hassles of her home life.
Maybe we can chat a bit about her situation, but I will not push her, I dont want to be stressed before my councilling. There are a few issues I really want to talk to him about, as this may be my last session. I dont want the twins latest fiasco to be the main topic. They will be there to deal with all the time.

I have 40 minutes to myself before I have to go out.
So I am going to indulge in reading rather then trying to kill myself doing any further house work. Last night again I managed to do the washing up, put on a load of washing and the only thing I didnt do that I wanted to have done was hoover, but the brushes have stopped, so I will have to take it apart (again) and put the belt back on!. That usually means knocking my knuckles on the stupid thing. So it can wait.

Savvy_sewing

Well as always the day has gone in a flash. Dropped DS and twin2 in town, had a cuppa and a muffin with twin2 before I went on to the councilling. I gave DS the bus fare back home, but twin2 had just enough to get home.
I dawdled on the way back to the car slightly, and was scraping through the door to collect DGD. oops.
The weather has been atroscious all day, and the rain has taken its toll on my joints.
Councilling was easier today. less stressful then it has been at times. I have come to realise that I am carrying around a lot of "stuff" and collecting a lot of "stuff" and its really caving in on me somewhat. So we have decided that I must to a plan to sort things out, give myself a time line. I think that I will need to ask those around me for some help, as its a rather daunting amount of work to clear.
I have been so busy with the emotional and the other stresses that I have let my room slip too much and it dawned on me this weekendish I think, that it was becoming too much. My room is no more a haven.
So things need to change somewhat. Which will not be that easy to do. But I think as it was me that became aware of it, it will be easier for me to tackle it.
I did give Biggest of Mooloo a couple of carrier bags of things that were from DGD's old room, pictures and a few teddies that she has never used, wont miss. Ready for a car boot sale at the weekend. So I am going to try and sort out a bit more to give her on Friday.
I havent anything else to report about the girls. Hopefully it will happen soon.

Savvy_sewing

Started the day reasonably well, trying to feel positive etc but had a stressfull time from Lunchtime. I was sitting in the hairdressers having my hair done, when I had a call from the Police. They had been with the housing officer to Twin2.s He said that things were not good. (That a neighbour had also been worried that Twin2 was being abused by others using her vunerability etc). So the housing and the Police are doing a two pronged attack to the Social Services about her situation.
They are unable to reach the Social Worker for the girl there as she has been changed again.
That Ds was there but that he was to go to the council about being homeless today. etc. So I promised to take him there.
I have then spent the afternoon in the council offices. It was not any success. But I didnt think it was.
However DS was very upset, as when he was first talking on the phone the woman was rather rude to him.
When she came down, and I was with him, then she was as professional as she could be. She knows me afterall, with the dealings fo the girls.
She was blunt with us that DS's name is not a good one, from his associations, and that when she heard his name her heart sank.
But the boy infront of her was well dressed, well presented, and she would try and help him by letting him use the computer and the phone, to try and source a room. The HB for a room maximum was £60. That they do not help as such with Deposits, but if a landlord will work with them, they will do a Bond with them. That would mean they would pay the landlord at the end of the tenancy if anything went wrong, but would then bill DS etc. However they would then not give him a good reference for future rentals etc etc.
I have come away with some websites to start the search. Which she said would not be an easy one. Certainly not in this area. He will have to move away from the area.
The problems with the twins etc she was also well aware of. She did ask me how I coped with it all. I ask myself the same thing. Often.
Anyway when we went away DS was "lost" he had not realised that he had a bad name etc, due to his associations etc etc with the family from hell.
He is now feeling rather rock bottom. I really feel for him. But I had told him the same. He hadnt believed me.
It was a hard afternoon.
DGD threw another tantrum as soon as I got in. So the lovely hairdo, and relaxed feelings of the start of the day are lost.
Now its try and keep calm, carry on. Not over react. etc etc
Opened the post and there was a letter from the Housing saying I was £100.62 in arrears.
I had already dealt with my rent earlier in the week, (rent is £106.58 a week).
I rang to find that actually I am £24.99 in arrears. So I asked why if I rang asked what I owed, I paid what they asked is this still being asked, and is not relationship to the funds etc paid and asked for.
Of course nobody could actually tell me. Then the man said it was in Credit not arrears of the £24.
So I said do you mean that I had to pay the rent instead of do the food shopping, and now I find we could have had the food instead. The man didnt seem to care. I said would that not bother you, and he said not really. So I am afraid I said. I tell you what, you get in my situation where you ask what the rent is to be cleared, and you decided to clear the debt and do without fresh fruit and veg and live off of the tins and potatoes so that you havent got a debt, and find that your in CREDIT! wouldnt you be upset. He didnt quite know what to say.
I said that I was fed up of them telling me different things all the time.
But of course it probably went in one ear, out the other and he was about to clock off for the day anyway.
Needless to say I am rather upset.
Sill I know. I should have just let the letter ride and ignored it. But I hate owing anyone anything. Since my bankrupcy its a high priority.

Right its time to relax- as far as I can getting DGD her tea, bath and bed.
Tomorrow its an early start, with babysitting for DGD2. What fun.
She is at least a georgeous happy little thing that you cant help but smile at.