The New Me And Our Quest To Become Debt Free And Have Self Belief

maralum

Hooray!!! The sun is shining again! Well done to Andy and I'm really glad it went well with your dad. It was all obviously meant to be!

spud30

I'm so pleased for you both - Andy, you've done great hun.

It's no less than you both deserve.

xxxx

emzig123

Congratulations on it all Weller, have been looking out for an update. That is brilliant news about Andy's job, more money as well? you'll be debt free in no time! I agree with Snaggles, concentrate on breaking the cycle and sorting out any issues you have with your mum'sbehaviour. You don't need to forgive her, I know I couldn't, but you may find it easier to deal with if you can accept what she's done and not let yourself become like her in any way. Anyway, I think you all deserve a massve pat on the back and it just show's that whatever S*** you get dealt, you overcome it. You are incredible!!

misspoppy

Hi Weller

I've just caught up and i can't believe your mother (she doen't even deserve that formal title) any I'm very pleased that you and your Dad are speaking again.

Big big congratulations to you and Andy on the new job, everything happens for a reason and it would seem that he lost his job so you and your Dad would find out the truth and he could find this great new job.

take care

moonlightpjs

Thank you all so much for your good wishes - i really do think that in this case things were meant to happen as they did and for all the heartache we had over the weekend (alomg with the fun times too) we are now feeling so much better. Andy has a new better job, my Dad is back with us again and I have two wonderful, beautiful children and last but not least I have the support of the DFW's without whom life would be a lot scarier. I have a lot to be thankful for and believe me I am thankful (or I will be when all Andys tools have gone :rotfl: ).

WiseOldBird_2

Well done Andy! and well done you for working through your crisis. What a difference 5 little days makes. I've just re-read your despairing entry from 5 April, and things couldn't be more different now. Now let that be a lesson to you!! Nothing is so bad that you can't with family and friends, get through it. (Not that I would really tell you off - you're a heroine). Keep us updated. Love and hugs.

ZTD

Snaggles wrote: »

7 hammers lol - are there 7 different ways of hitting things with them? (that's a genuine question by the way - I have NO idea about diy at all!).

Of course there are:


Pin hammer - for knocking small nails in.



Claw hammer - for knocking big nails in (and removing them).



Sledge hammer, for driving fence posts etc.



And M C Hammer, for when you just can't touch this.

jesster_2

Hi Weller

Am so pleased that it looks like things are turning around for you, nice one Andy on his new job!

Just want to echo what others have said: please don't let the fact that your mum has past issues excuse her behaviour... but similarly don't write off whatever it was happened to her in her past, because it is partly to blame for how she acts towards you. I think it's important to acknowledge that it plays a part, because doing that can help you get your head around - to an extent - how she is with you. The danger is that otherwise you end up blaming yourself in some way, even if it's just subconsciously.

If it helps any, there's a book I read called 'when you and your mother can't be friends' by, I think, Victoria Secunda. It's slightly american 'therapy'ish in places, but has lots of real life accounts of women's difficult relationships with their mothers. It's not going to solve all the problems, but as I read it I kept thinking: 'well, that puts mine in perspective!' and so it was a revealing read in that sense: quite reassuring that it's not at all unusual to have a difficult relationship, and some mums out there are officially and utterly off their rockers!

In case your library doesn't have the book (got mine off greenmetropolis for £3) a big part of what it says is gradually to take back a calm and quiet control of how your mother impinges on your life. It may not feel like it, but you have been doing that, and are doing that now, with controlling whether she comes to your house, getting your dad a mobile so you can contact him directly, etc. That may sound backwards, but that's what you're doing because you're making yourself safer in the situation and regaining control.

Just wanted to say you're halfway there already, and the only way is up! xxx

tudorfan22

just been reading this thread and am totally gripped by the whole story, really glad your hubby got his job, you sound like a lovely lady and yours kids sound adorable, you are very lucky and ust reminds me that the best things in life really are free! i really hope you and your family stay united and loving through it all! it really tugged at my heart strings, so glad all is ending happily, i can sleep in peace now!!

Sa1sysoo

ZTD wrote: »

Of course there are:


Pin hammer - for knocking small nails in.



Claw hammer - for knocking big nails in (and removing them).



Sledge hammer, for driving fence posts etc.



And M C Hammer, for when you just can't touch this.

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: