Family members not talking to me - What would you do?

Charityworker

Here's the situation - My aunt, my cousins and my cousins son are no longer talking to me. I got married 3 years ago and I posted the pictures of my wedding on facebook. A year later my aunt and her kids and grandkid started posting nasty comments about me under the photos which obviously sounded jealous. I had a wonderful wedding for a fraction of the cost they paid due to me having an MSE wedding. Nasty comments from them about me in my wedding dress on every photo. Then they started commenting on all my other photos. They sound so jealous though. I don't know whether they are so thick they thought I couldnt see them or what. Then one of my cousins on the same side of the family started calling me the creature from the black lagoon and my mum the leathery old slapper.

I blocked them on facebook. Now the rest of the family are blanking me as if I've done something wrong. I wasn't the one who posted nasty comments on their pictures. Why am I being treated like I'm the one who's done something wrong? My parents are also treating me like I'm the one who put nasty comments on their pictures. My mum doesn't seem to mind that her sister called her a leathery old slapper. They went on holiday with them in June and my mum posted pictures of herself sitting by the pool and my cousin posted nasty comments about her. My mum just keeps on coming out with stuff like "oh she didn't mean it" and "oh just ignore it". I'm afraid I can't. What would you do if you were me?

aliasojo

Charityworker wrote: »

What would you do if you were me?

I'd ignore the lot of them and not even give them a second thought.

Your family are supposed to be on your side, if they are not, why interact with them in any way?

tea_lover

Leave facebook for a start.

sassyblue

Stick to your guns! What they said and did was nasty and uncalled for.

I'm in a similar situation but l won't have people in my life who treat me like carp, even if they're family!!

There's another one in our family who posts negative comments on photos and stuff on FB* then wonders why people pull him up for it :rotfl:

If your mum wants to let them get on with it let her, but you don't have to.

Hold your head up high and only have people in your life who mean something to you. xxxx


*and before anyone calls it faceache, it's the people using it and causing the trouble - not FB's fault.

Person_one

tea_lover wrote: »

Leave facebook for a start.

No need, she's blocked them so its as if they don't exist on her facebook.

OP, ignore them, you have the moral high ground here and your mum is probably hurt but doesn't want to admit and have to face that fact that her sister is a bully.

sassyblue

tea_lover wrote: »

Leave facebook for a start.

and is that going to make her family see sense?

*max*

I don't know why you would think they are doing this because they are "jealous" somehow? It's entirely possible they are just nasty idiots, no jealousy involved.

Ignore them. Why would you even want to do anything about it? What's to gain? I know I wouldn't want a relationship with people who insult me.

Gavin83

Honestly if I was in your position I'd just cut everyone out of my life who had a problem with what I'd done, I couldn't be dealing with people like that in my life.

tea_lover

sassyblue wrote: »

and is that going to make her family see sense?

Not exactly, but if the problem here is comments on photos being possibly misinterpreted then just avoid the situation.

FB seems to cause a lot of rows and bad feeling amongst friends and family, why bother with it? If you're close enough geographically to actually see people in the flesh then surely that's a better idea than commenting on each photos online.

Person_one

tea_lover wrote: »

Not exactly, but if the problem here is comments on photos being possibly misinterpreted then just avoid the situation.

FB seems to cause a lot of rows and bad feeling amongst friends and family, why bother with it? If you're close enough geographically to actually see people in the flesh then surely that's a better idea than commenting on each photos online.

Misinterpreted? How many ways can you interpret being called 'The creature from the black lagoon' on your wedding day?

JimmyTheWig

I think it sort of depends on what conversations (in whatever form) happened alongside you blocking them.
Unfriending someone, or even worse blocking them, is a pretty big deal to some people. Unfriending is saying "I don't want to be your friend any more" and blocking is saying "As far as I'm concerned, you no longer exist".
That's a big deal. Not surprised they're not talking to you after that.

But if you explained to them that you didn't like their comments and they continued and then explained that you were blocking them on Facebook but were still happy to be friendly in real-life then that's not such a big deal.

If I were you, I'd concentrate on getting your mum onside.
Explain to her how these comments made you feel, how unfair it was of them to write them when all your friends could see the comments, etc.
Explain that while she can just brush this sort of abuse to one side, you are not able to.
Explain why you thought that blocking them was the best solution.
Once she understands, she may be able to talk to the others.