Help - just found out I'm expecting...

pimento

Tiddlywinks wrote: »

I do believe in "family planning" and, yes, perhaps it would have been better to stick with the two rather than go for a third BUT it's happened and cannot be undone so.... let's try to help.

Er, yes it can. If I were in the OPs situation, I would, too (undo it).

aggypanthus

apologies from me, my comment was just my initail gut response and dont meant to upset anyone.
I wish you the very best for the new baby.
unfurtunately I do not have any of my own, but i do love kids and have many in my extended family.

Bufger

Start watching replays of the good life. You can be very happy without much money! Also watch darling buds of may, a big family is a special thing when its a happy home

I just have the one but the second is being planned soon along with my wife giving up work to be with the kids. It will be a struggle but i know we'll be a happier family for it.

magenta22

These things happen. For all we know the OP could have been on the pill and it failed somehow.

Congratulations OP :-)

I don't earn a lot of money, I don't have a lot of money and I am about to lose my job so desperately looking for something else.

Before I was told of that, had already decided to start trying for a baby, It will be hard I know if I can't find something else straight away but will have to cross that brigde when come to it.

Perhaps they won't have the latest so called must have gadgets or be dressed in designer clothes but would you want your children to have all that even if you were in a postition to?

As others have said, if we all waited until the 'right' time to have babies, most would never have them.

VfM4meplse

VfM4meplse wrote: »

I happen to think that every child is a blessing. I also know that the most foolproof way of avoiding conception is by not having sex.

McKneff wrote: »

For those who are unaware of the workings of the body it is perfectly physically possible to get pregnant without actually having penetrative sex.

But given the shelf life and dexterity of sperm, highly unlikely. Sex is a broad umbrella term: it covers a range of activities, all of which can be prevented where there is a will.

candygirl wrote: »

I saw some turkey basters in poundland last week;) and my lesbian couisn has had twins:ja

We were referring to unplanned pregnancies on the thread - but well done to your cousin, BoGoF:T! A very MSE option, saves wining and dining a man....or even cooking them a turkey supper!

Yum

HI, Coming in quite late to the thread BUT...I just had my first baby in August, it was unplanned and I was over 3 months when I found out. I REALLY worried about how we would cope financially, we lived with my parents, partner was on a very low wage, I was on a pretty good wage but only entitled to the minimum SMP so didnt know how we would do it. We had quite a few arguments and tears over how we would cope.

In reality it gave us the kick we needed. We moved out of my parents, funished the flat cheaply (ikea, gumtree), I brought all the baby bits and paid off any debt so that we were in a good financial position. I even saved a bit so we had a bit of money to fall back on (goes to show how much money you can save when you stop going out on the !!!!). And it pushed my other half to look for a better paying job (which he got) so he can support us while im on maternity leave. My only aim was not to fall into debt while on maternity leave like many people I know have.

Its not easy but we are coping fine and you will too

I really want another baby BUT with 3 of us in a 1 bed flat we just dont have the space. Im halfway through a degree with the OU too and if I dont pick it back up now I never will.

SO my tips are;
1. IF you have any disposable income at the moment pay off your debts as much as possible
2. Log on to all the second hand sites and get any baby bits you dont already have 2nd hand dirt cheap
3. Stay relaxed - you dont want to stress yourself into early labour (less time to sort the finances)
4. Read the oldstyle board - its actually amazing!

Wishing you all the best, im sure you will be fine.

1sttimer_2

Aww - Congratulations!

My DD is also in same position. Definitely an unplanned one as she was on the pill, was taking prescribed tables and the mini-pill to stop her periods due to her anaemia but still became pregnant. Baby 3 due February. She has 2 boys and new one is also a boy. She'll be able to save on clothing/toys as they will be able to be passed down.

They were in the process of selling their house to move from a 2 bed to a 4 bed, and considered termination, but when they went for counselling, they realised they couldn't do it. So they've completed their house selling and are tightening their belts and getting on with it. He will be a muched loved addition.

You will be fine - you just have to get one with it, and I bet in another years time, you will wonder why you thought it was so bad. Babies don't mind what they wear, nor what toys they have, it's the adults who think it matters. What is important is that you relax, look after yourself and don't stress about it.

Take care.

harrys_nan

No advice really, Just want to say MANY congratulations, children are a joy and a blessing so enjoy. You will manage so just enjoy this new baby

ILoveEoin

Many Congratulations on your wonderful news:) xx

Ellejmorgan

I'm having my baby in 10 days and it wasn't planned, infact I have a serious medical condition and was on morphine patches and awaiting surgery-My relationship was a disaster and I have previously lost a child during delivery-As well as all that this will be my 4th c-section.

I decided to continue with the pregnancy and now 6 months on I am so glad I did-Hasn't been easy, my relationship has improved and have had lots of help from the medical profession.

What I'm trying to say is how we feel one day isn't always how we feel the next or in 3 months time, take it one day at a time....