Really cant cope :( [Merged]

easilydistracted

Hi teabag

Debated whether to answer this one for a while as I'd be coming from a professionals point of view so the advice might sound a bit impersonal plus didnt know how welcome it would be anyway a few points:

-I think it would be useful to start with working out exactly what you can't cope with and what would be helpful. At first glance it seems like the main problem is school but that's not what it seems like reading between the lines.

-Mainstream social services these days have high thresholds so a lot of what they will be doing is child protection work. In terms of a parent struggling to cope the main role they would have is if there's genuinely a risk of the child having to go into care. If this is the case there should be a service which does intensive crisis work to stop this needing to happen. However this will be short term emergency work at it tends to be apparent from the initial assessment whether this is the actual situation. If possible I'd suggest going to the office which covers your area to discuss this face to face.

-There are also Disabled Children's Social Workers. They often have a role in working with children with a learning disability. They will want to be clear what the cause of these problems are if possible ie (if you know) was your child born with some of these difficulties or do you think it is all down to her traumatic early experiences? If the cause is emotional they will suggest CAMHS as this is the service that has the appropriate skills. If there is also a biological cause then they should be able to support you. The sort of help you could expect is a family support worker to visit, maybe a befriender or some care support, possibly respite with a family link carer if your child has high needs.

-Social services are not responsible for school standards and supervision, there are other regulatory systems such as school governers and OFSTED. I would ask the school what their complaints system is, I think this should be online but I'm not 100% as education isn't my field. The only time that social services would have an investigatory role is if there was an actual allegation of abuse against a school professional.

-CAF is for the level below social services involvement, have you checked out what else they can help you with?

-Have CAMHS suggested any specific parenting classes to you? The mainstream ones can be of limited help in children with emotional trauma. CAMHS can be reluctant to work with children with a learning difficulty as well as emotional trauma but this is still their role.

-Re the home education idea, you have to register your child as home educated and there is an inspection regime. Your council should have info re how this works on their web page. I imagine the professionals involved are concerned as I think this will halt the statement process and can add a lot to stresses at home. But refusing to send your child to school as the school cant keep your child safe is obviously an option. Do you have a contact in the Special Educational Needs dept involved. Can they help with the lunchtime issue. The EWO would also have a role in resolving this if your child was out of education.

(Im a social worker who currently works in mainstream and has a background in Disabled Children's Social work and childcare before this, so my understanding of educational services may be a little inaccurate)

Hope this was of some help, will answer your questions if poss.

easilydistracted

shell_girl

Another possible route for help is the Learning Disability Helpline, on 0808 808 1111.

I'm a little confused, you say your daughter has a learning disability, but no statement? Has she had an actual diagnosis of learning disability, or have CAMHS said they 'think' she has a learning disability and this is why they can't help?