Real life MMD: Should my friend keep the cash for my dress?

Augustus_the_Strong

Don't feel embarrassed, just be open. Ask her again, and tell her you really need the money so would be grateful if she could get on with it. Say 'I do appreciate your selling that dress for me, but I'd be really grateful if you could let me have the money as I'm finding it hard to make ends meet now I haven't got a job'. Maybe she could even give you a job in her shop till you sort things out.

If that doesn't work, ditch her as a friend and sell another frock yourself on eBay to cover the loss.

craftycrafter

Go to the shop not only when it is full of customers, but when the till is likely to be full too, so that she cannot say the till is empty. Does she bank her takings daily? What time? Get there before the till is emptied. Be polite but firm. Good Luck.

florere

Yes, you should ask for your money, she is being very unfair by not giving it to you, and if it causes the friendship to break, well I think you would be better of without her. With friends like that who needs enemies. Good luck.

pugsydog

£30 is a lot of money to some people and nothing to others but friendship is priceless. Sit her down, buy a cup of coffee or tea (A cheap one) and tell her how you feel. Get her to agree a time and date when she will repay you and make her aware that if she doesn`t pay you, she will no longer be your friend and you will then have to think about telling other people about her unreliability (not that an obviously nice person like you would carry out such a deed, but it might be the poke she needs to realise her reputation is now on the line). Hope you don`t lose a friend, but learn by the mistake of being too trusting. Good luck

babushkava

'I've got a bit of a dilemma, can I pick your brain about it?'

'Sure, go ahead.'

'Well, I'm a bit confused really. I was so pleased when you said you would sell that dress for me - and then you did, which was brilliant. But now I feel I am asking and asking and I'm not getting the money for it. What's that about?'

(Leave a silence)...

Good luck, whatever you do and I hope you get your money.

Avocado

The balance to strike here is the firm but gentle balance, which is tricky. Yes of course you need to get your cash, because you need it but more so because that's what was agreed upon, fair and square. It is yours after all. Tell her you need it today, let your manner and tone be gentle but let your words be firm. Don't offer an excuse (eg, I really need it for petrol to go and see my ill Granny) because any excuse you offer will give her a chance to deflect and wriggle out (eg, I'm going that way, I'll give you a lift).

R1kusdikus

Hi, i agree with one of your replies. send a text or go round when she is at home. if she doesnt have the money there with her, ask her if she can send the money over internet banking there and then. if she says she doesnt have this, advise her you will go into her shop when she is there and get the money off her out of the till

ceridwen

Personally - I'd ring that friend just before the next time you see her and say that its proving really difficult financially at present (ie because of that redundancy) and I really need MY money now - so please bring her chequebook with her to write out a cheque to me for the amount.

On her turning up - if she doesnt immediately bring out the money (as cash or the cheque I asked for) without my asking - then I would say "Can you write out that cheque to me NOW please - and we can get on with our evening and forget about it?" If she'd "forgotten" her cheque book, despite a reminder only about 1 hour before we met up - then I would say "I'm not going to be able to get on and relax and enjoy my evening until I have that money - I need it so badly. So - can we go to a cashpoint and get it now and then get on with this evening?"

If she STILL didnt respond with handing me money instantly - then I'd say "We'd better forget about the rest of the evening - I'm really upset that you still havent given me my money - despite 6 requests to do so. I'll leave you to think about whether you value our friendship or no - because it feels to me as if you don't" and literally walk away from her and go home.

In my head - I would be giving her a week to come back to me with my money/profuse apologies/a present for having upset me and, if that happened, the friendship might continue. If it didnt happen - a week came and went and STILL no sign of my money - then she would get dropped (ie because she clearly was no friend of mine).

joehoover

No brainer, if that was the deal, (no commission etc) and she said she would give you the sale money then she has to. Just tell her you really need the cash as your'e skint.

No one is that scatty, some people I know purposedfully underpay people for bills when sharing hosues, and little things like if they go to the shop, get me this and will pay you later. Later never comes with these people, they are fully aware what they are doing.

She's in business, does she forget to pay her suppliers also? I imagine she woudln't have a successful business if she was scatty.

Demand your money, she has no excuse whatsoever

tobiascurious

Regardless of whether she pays you or not it's not worth losing a friendship over

Some people on here are rather too simplistic eg "she didn't pay you immediately therefore she is simply not a friend"