Finally reaching out for some help...

ZTD

kerri_dfw wrote: »

Was craving cola and remembered I had a can of P in the boot of the car that's been there 6 months so fished it out. Perfectly cold mmmm and free

Can of what?! :eek:

Cherryjack

spending diary such a good idea :-)).. it really does work.. think i need to do a diet one aswell lol xx

kerri_dfw

Right, I have 50 items photographed, written down in a spreadsheet ready to list them properly on fleabay in the morning. Now to sleep so I can actually list them before 5.30 tomorrow. Also want to photograph some belts and scarves which didn't photograph properly as the camera was playing up grr.

The problem that I have is that it's my sisters clothes that I've listed as she couldn't be bothered. It's taken me a good part of 4hrs to get to where I am and she's expecting the money I make from it to go to her. Should I do this or should I give her part of the money? She was just going to take them down the CS. The worst thing is I've not even done 1/4 of one bag, and there's 4 more ikea bags where that came from. I'm going to need a lot more free listing weekends.

Sleep time. NSD successful

chevalier

kerri_dfw wrote: »

The problem that I have is that it's my sisters clothes that I've listed as she couldn't be bothered. It's taken me a good part of 4hrs to get to where I am and she's expecting the money I make from it to go to her. Should I do this or should I give her part of the money? She was just going to take them down the CS. The worst thing is I've not even done 1/4 of one bag, and there's 4 more ikea bags where that came from. I'm going to need a lot more free listing weekends.

Sleep time. NSD successful

Hi kerry I have read through your diary. I would suggest one of two strategies to deal with this. a) say to your sister, that what ever you get from the clothes is an extra payment towards her debt to you (ie not a replacement), as you need the debt paying back quicker.

or b) that you take your listing fees and paypal fees out of the profit (why should you be out of pocket) plus a commission for helping her out (say 20%).

personally I would go with a)....
Also have you done a Statement of Affairs? Link here http://www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalc.html

It might help you to see where you can cut back?
chev

Cherryjack

i think thats a good idea aswell.. the money should go back to you for the debt.. if not just give her half x its takes a long time to list

hp48910

Yes totally agree, you need to keep some, if not all of the money for you. You mut agree an amount with her before you list all those other bags of stuff. After all you are doing all the donkey work. It will be a good way for her to see how she can make a difference to the balance she owes you. If not, it will just be another way to allow her not to take responsibility for her debts. That many bags will take yonks to list!

Although saying that, she doesn't really seem to have repayment at the forefront considering she was planning to CS them. Also she could have given them to you saying that she didn't have time to list but if you did you could keep all the proceeds....

Tough love........Don't always "fix" everything as this'll keep her in the same mindset/attitude/behaviour that she has now, all because she's being allowed to be like that.......If you weren't doing that for her, you could be making and then selling some of your crafty bits which would be leading to more income/less debt for you.....

kerri_dfw

If I ask her if I can take the money off her debt to me then she will say no. I've asked her previously if I can put her birthday money towards repaying the amount she owes me and she's said no, so this won't be any different. She doesn't see the debt to me as a priority. Instead I'm going to take a nice amount off the amount I give her as commission. I don't think she really has much clue as to how much stuff she's given me or how much it could make.

Just photographed scarves and belts ready to do those after I've made sure this first 50 get listed today. Going to be another NSD and will do some much needed batch cooking this evening

chevalier I have a sort of SOA on my first post, I've recorded what I *should* be allocating to stuff and keep updating this . I'm now also keeping a spending diary to track exactly what is being spent when and how much, but this is only 3 days old so far

See you all on the other side of fleabay x

ZTD

kerri_dfw wrote: »

If I ask her if I can take the money off her debt to me then she will say no. I've asked her previously if I can put her birthday money towards repaying the amount she owes me and she's said no, so this won't be any different. She doesn't see the debt to me as a priority.

Then you must make sure you don't lend even the tiniest amount to her any more. Looks like you've learned a £1600 lesson.

hp48910

Tell her that's the deal rather than ask her. If she contests it then remind her that she was gonna CS it anyway so it's kind like a money free repayment to her. She owes you a lot of money don't forget, that amount could sort you right out xx

debtfreewannabe321

Kerri you are too kind! I can be the same with my family, but fortunately they don't like asking for help, but i still would give my mother my last fiver if she needed it. Don't forget you need to pay ebay for listing so i hope you weren't planning on giving her all the money!

Does she know your current financial situation? I really think she is leeching on your good nature and these things always end up in tears as one day you will eventually have enough ...i would stand up to her now. Not lend her anymore money, use the money from the clothes for debt repayments and s*d what she thought (i'm a meany i know) i have a funny feeling she will, if you let her, be re-paying you the money she owes you until you are both retired! Then she'll have the excuse she can't afford it because she's on a small pension. Lol.

Anyway i really don't mean to 'slate' your sister, but it's just my opinion as an outsider, take care xx