Disabled son beaten up at college, twice

adouglasmhor

Justie wrote:

whilst I understand the emotional response unfortunately this lad had probably been on the wrong end of a few beatings already and that's how he's learnt to behave like he has... violence begets violence.

Or he has just been allowed to do whatever he liked, never given boundaries and that's how he ended up like he did. There is a middle way but it's to late for the little scroat in question.

. My little brother who has learning difficulties was bullied at school until he told me and I got a few of my mates to give out some to the bullies. Their violence begot ours but it stopped hteir because my crowd were not liberty takers and scroats are.

Avoriaz

going2die_rich wrote:

If it was my son (and I was female), I'd just give the local kids you see hanging around £5 each and get them to kick the crap out of this guy. Once he's had a good kicking he'll stay away. Especially if the guys left in a a condition to need to go to the hospital.

Me personally being a guy, I'd have no problems in stamping all over this 16 -21 year old. I wouldn't just stop at a few slaps either. I'd even take as far as finding out where he lived and letting him know next time I'll be at his door and his family would be paying the price too.

Just get some male family members together, get them to drag him to a quiet place and see how scared he is when being stamped on

With scummy people like that, violence is the only way of making them understand!

Although I can understand the emotions involved, all the above is how NOT to handle the situation and makes you just as bad as the thug. Violence usually only begets violence.

Paying one lot of thugs to beat up another thug is crazy beyond belief. What happens if they seriously injure or kill him? You could be on a murder or manslaughter charge and you could get life, and quite right too. And you could be directly responsible for your hired thugs going to jail.

Similarly beating him up yourself is a fast route to prison.

And threatening his family is equally absurd. They might be entirely innocent of any influence on his behaviour. They might be totally unaware of what he is like away from home. They might be frustrated decent parents who have done their best but have raised a bad son. Not all thugs have thugs for parents.

We live in a supposedly civilised society and, no matter how flawed our criminal justice system is, if we all take the law into our own hands in the manner that you propose, we face anarchy.

Pobby wrote:

…. have your son see a doctor to record the extent of his injuries and attempt to sue for damages. Might teach the little toe rag a lesson…!

That is what I would recommend.

Help your son to take out a private prosecution against the little scumbag.

You need good legal advice, probably available for free at the CAB. I don’t know if you can sue for damages if he is prosecuted, found guilty and sentenced. The law may say that he has then already been punished.

However it may be possible to have legal representation at his trial and apply for damages to the court.

Good luck and I do hope that your son gets over these horrible events. He is lucky that he has a caring parent like you.

Morglin

Sorry to hear about this - in my view, those little ***** that start on those that are vulnerable deserve a good kicking themselves.:mad: :mad:

Tell the police that you consider this attack on your son to be a "hate crime" - they are then obligated to pursue the matter with more energy than they usually show, and hopefully this little yob will get some of what he deserves.:mad: :mad:

Colleges usually have a disability support section - contact them and make it clear that you want some action taken to protect your son.

If they don't, then complain to the head of the college and the LEA/department that funds them.

There are always formal complaint procedures, and I would follow them up until something is done.

Lin

Ellie2758

More on the casual violence of today:
Last night my son's band were playing their first gig - at a church youth club (well, young rock stars have to start somewhere, lol). At 9pm as the kids started leaving one lad came back in with blood pouring from his cheekbone. A group of about 4/5 16 year olds were just passing by as he stepped outside and one of them decked him. For absolutely no reason. At 9pm. In the town centre, opposite the Police Station.

I despair.

specsappeal

hi swan, just wanted to offer my support really. My son (13) also has dyspraxia with bad fine motor skills and speech problems so i know how you feel. My boy was severely bullied to the point where he had an emotional breakdown at age 10. He has been on medication for stress ever since. I can only say that you are right not to let this matter lie and write as many letters as you can and maybe take it up with your local MP. I would also write to the local newspaper and get them to name and shame the thug and then post up the article all over the place. my thoughts are with you and your boy.

Swan_2

I never usually post about personal issues & it took a lot of courage for me to bring myself to say anything at all in 'public' (I very nearly set up an AE to post, but knowing me I'd forget who I was meant to be & give the game away :rolleyes:)

& I have to say that I'm absolutely overwhelmed by the level of support & all your kind & helpful words

thank you all again :A

I'm going to make another post answering & acknowledging the things you've said, but I don't type well/fast, so it could take some time

Catseyez

Hi,

I have just read through this thread and I am sickened.

I have a handicapped sibling and spent most of my childhood standing up to his bullies who were male, older and twice as tall as me! I am female and was always the shortest in my class!

That was twenty years ago and it really saddens me to know that in today's day and age, this sort of outrageous behaviour still goes on.

There are some anti-bullying sites around and those which tackle disablism. I couldn't tell you which sites they are but it's worth googling. They might be able to offer further advice. I feel that there should be more support from your son's college. Whilst his independence is very important, there should be some sort of monitoring to ensure situations like this don't happen.

I can't really offer much advice other than to say, I know how it feels when a vulnerable member of your family is treated like that. The phrase 'blood boiling' doesn't even begin to describe it.

Catseyez x

Violetta_2

Hi Swan I just wondered what was happening. How is your son is he back at college I do hope he gets his confidence back what a disgusting thing to do. I do believe in karma and that thug will get his.

Swan_2

Violetta wrote:

Hi Swan I just wondered what was happening. How is your son is he back at college I do hope he gets his confidence back what a disgusting thing to do. I do believe in karma and that thug will get his.

sorry I've been away so long, I've been spending some quiet time with my son & have hardly been on-line at all

also, my head is still so full of upsetting things that I've tried several times to reply sensibly & it all comes out ranting nonsense & looks as if I'm crazy, so I've ended up deleting everything before I post it
I've even tried drafting a reply in word to copy & paste, but that doesn't work either

we, that is my ex OH & I, have a meeting scheduled at the college this afternoon, but to be honest, I'm fully expecting them to close ranks on us, but we'll see
I will report back later today

apparantly (we heard this from his friend who's on the same course, so it's yet to be confirmed) the young thug was back at the college again earlier this week looking for my boy & ended up slapping the friend across the face!!! the police were called, but I don't know what the outcome was
I'm going to call the friend's mother & find out if it's true, & if it is, advise her to press charges

my son hasn't been back to college, he's now worrying about possibly being stabbed! & worrying that the thug finds out where we live

the whole situation beggars belief :mad: :mad: :mad:

redrabbit29

You say you called the college? I would write a letter demanding a meeting with the principal. Explain the circumstances of your disabled son's problems and the issues you have faced. Demand that he reply within 7 days.

If not, try contacting the local paper too. You shouldn't have to put up with this, and as you said, it is 99% likely that the bully will not be punished.