Problems with my husband again

make_me_wise

How much more of your life do you want to spend with someone who makes you feel this unhappy and insecure, at best is playing mind games with you and who takes no responsibility to sort out his debt?

Personally I would have split with him after a few months of the carry on you describe. Ultimately only you can make yourself happy. Decide what kind of future you want and then take steps to get it.

maggirl

I still care abut him very much but i dont think I am in love with him at all if that makes sense. sometimes i see a glimmer of the man I met when I was 21, he can be funny and charming, but then a funny and care free "free spirit" with no sense of responsibility is not what you need when you are getting into your 40s and have a child to think about.

The hassling me for s*x is what really bugs me, especially in front of my daughter. She isn't stupid and even though she doesnt know what he is on about, she is starting to guess and I have told him time and time again to stop it, and not say anything inappropriate in front of her. She sees him saying "so when is it going to happen then" angrily and then she comes to me later and says "is Daddy wanting cuddles again?" and I have to explain it away. He could at least wait until she is out of the room or in bed.

He will not leave, in arguments recently I have suggested he finds a place of his own but he just changes the subject.

Got some serious thinking and planning to do I think.

candygirl

I've no idea what he's playing at, but it all sounds very hard work to me:(:(I know I couldn't cope with it, but know we are all different.Good luck hun:A

BitterAndTwisted

In which case suggest that he sods off and finds his own place calmly some time when you're not arguing. Or wait until the lease on your accommodation expires and move to somewhere else on your own.

He sounds absolutely hateful. I wouldn't want to share the same air as him.

candygirl

I'm wondering if he's going on web sites, leaving condoms around etc to get a reaction/sexual reponse from you :oIt's totally inappropriate that he comes on to you in front of your DD, but if he repulses you to the extent you never want to have sex with him again, you do need to split up.It's not healthy is it?:(:(

suited-aces

I can't help but feel the poor fella is being demonised for the fact OP keeps rejecting him.

ItchyFeet

I really don't think it's that complicated - condoms, ky jelly and viagra = sex with somebody (if not the op, then someone else).

It doesn't sound like the relationship is working for either party.

dirtysexymonkey

suited-aces wrote: »

I can't help but feel the poor fella is being demonised for the fact OP keeps rejecting him.

absolutely this.

dont think hes an innocent but i dont think the op is either. i hope she has a plan for her half of the marital debt once she divorces him because shes gonna have to pay it. doesnt matter if its in his name only.

wannabe_sybil

Wants sex - romantic music, bottle of wine, charm offensive

groping like a dirty old man that everyone avoids - it's not about sex, it's about control.

Hope it works out for you OP

dirtysexymonkey

wannabe_sybil wrote: »

Wants sex - romantic music, bottle of wine, charm offensive

groping like a dirty old man that everyone avoids - it's not about sex, it's about control.

Hope it works out for you OP

it sounds like the op will consider anything her husband does as being like a dirty old man because she doesnt fancy him.

interesting that you think the man should always take the lead in these situations. the world and people have moved on. its not the 40s anymore. women enjoy sex too.;)