Changing a childs name -Help needed.

thesaint

You are correct Becles, the biological father would lose P.R. if he allowed his child to be adopted.

edited

gilly41

Hi
I hope I am not speaking out of turn here but reading between the lines if their dad isnt happy about their names being changed and he is still paying maintenance is he maybe still wanting to keep some contact with his children? Why I ask is that my OH was paying maintenance(son is 23 so not applicable now!) and his ex wanted their sons name changed(he was 12 at the time).She insisted that his son didnt want to see my OH and she went ahead and changed their sons surname to her new surname.It was done without my OHs consent----so still to this day not sure how she went about it!!Anyhow, his son has since come back in to his dads life and he insists he never wanted his name changed(his mum just did it) and that he did want to see his dad but he felt he couldnt upset his mum(who for whatever reason didnt want my OH to see his son but still wanted the maintenance).
Please dont take this post the wrong way but think long and hard before changing their names.My stepson has since changed his name back to that of his dads
x

Zara33

If a father has parental responsibility, his consent is required to change his child's name. This is the case even if he and the mother have separated, divorced or remarried and if the father has no contact whatsoever with the child.

If a father, who has parental responsibility and who no longer lives with the mother and child, refuses to give his consent to change his child's name, the only course of action for the mother to apply to the courts for leave (permission) to change the child's name. A court will give permission if it believes it will be in the child's best interests to allow the name change. The court will take into account the degree of commitment of the father to the child and the quality of contact between the father and child to determine whether the link with the father (by shared surname) can be broken. An older child's views (age 11 upwards) will also be important in deciding whether the name change should be allowed.

http://www.ukdps.co.uk/CanIChangeMyChildrensNames.html

gravitytolls

I requested changing my name to my SF when I was 13. I had recently bumped into my father and his new family, and wanted to reassure my SF that I really knew he was my FATHER, and I loved him.

With hindsight, I realise he couldn't give a monkeys either way, but I feel proud that I was sensitive enough to want to make the gesture.

Anyhoo, the thing is, he and my mother seperated when I was 17. He never made any contact with me again, and my own father had long since left my life also (I could get acomplex about this you know).

Since I got married, I have another surname, and I now realise that names mean nothing. I have my Christian name, and that's fine. The surnbame is just that, a name. It's how others know which Karen I am, and how the bank knows how to inform me I'm overdrawn LOL.

It's a tough decision to make, don't rush into it. Why do the children want to change their names? Does their father wish to maintain a good relationship with them? Does their step daddy want to extend teh family and wish for you all to have the sme name to avoid confusion later? Or is it simply that he adores them so much, he wants to give them something more permanent of himself?

Take your time about this. You don't need to make a legal decision just yet. You can contact schools etc., requesting that they wish to be known as, and they shoudl change things on the registers. This then enables them to have the choice when they get older.

thesaint

Schools should not let a child be "known as" another name without the consent of everyone whom has Parental responsibility. They do, but would be in trouble if the absent parent found out and made a fuss.

welshcakes

If you'd like to PM me, I can send you the two document templates you need to change your children's names. You just need the one witnessed by a gp, magistrate, vicar etc - pillar of society thing. Some may charge a little for witnessing, some like vicar won't (though a fiver donation to their church roof would probably be welcomed).

One is the Statutory Declaration specifically for changing child's name and other is supporting letter (where you can't locate other parent but have made efforts).

On an interesting side note, a few months ago I had an update letter from Child Benefit (my 17yr was staying on in f/t education so I had to contact them) and I received a form back to complete basic details for kids. The form gave me the option of whether I wanted the children known by any name other than that on their birth certificate. I was taken aback as I never thought such offers were ever made by HMRC. Anyone else had one of these forms?

Bossyboots

kelloggs36 wrote:

They can be known as any name you wish so long as it isn't for fraudulent purposes. So the school could be given their 'real' names and then have a note that they should be known as your surname. When they reach the age of 18 they can both change their names themselves by deedpoll. That is what we did with my daughter. Her bank account is in her official name, but the school refer to her by her known as name.

The rules on name change are different for children than they are for adults and you cannot just change their name.

While schools may allow children to be known by a different name, if anyone else with parental responsibility objected they would not be allowed to do so. It only happens because either the absent parent doesn't know, has agreed, or simply hasn't objected. (Guess which sucker was doing unpaid reception duty in a school when a father did decide to object rather loudly:eek: ).

welshcakes

If the other parent cannot be located to ask permission (reasonable efforts have to be made) then one CAN allow for child to be known by a different name as long as not fruadulent, designed to misrepresent or mislead. In the OP's case, she fulfils all these requirements and can change lawfully implement and ditribute notices of the children's name change as soon as she has obtained the permitted witness signature on the paperwork (which she can type up and print off herself).

I have successfully done this for both my children and even a leading High Street bank has accepted the documents as valid when I subsequently opened child accounts in my children's new names.

thesaint

welshcakes wrote:

If the other parent cannot be located to ask permission (reasonable efforts have to be made) then one CAN allow for child to be known by a different name as long as not fruadulent, designed to misrepresent or mislead. In the OP's case, she fulfils all these requirements and can change lawfully implement and ditribute notices of the children's name change as soon as she has obtained the permitted witness signature on the paperwork (which she can type up and print off herself).

I have successfully done this for both my children and even a leading High Street bank has accepted the documents as valid when I subsequently opened child accounts in my children's new names.

The requirements you state are not the only ones, my previous post gives more:

You can change a child's name by deed poll if you can show that you have tried to contact your daughter's father without success.
You would have to show that you have tried his last known address, contacted his relatives and his friends etc.
You would also have to show that he has no interest i.e not making maintenance payments, not sending presents.

He is showing an interest by making maintenance payments.
If all these requirements haven't been met, the father can go to court and get the decision reversed.

kelloggs36

Bossyboots wrote:

The rules on name change are different for children than they are for adults and you cannot just change their name.

While schools may allow children to be known by a different name, if anyone else with parental responsibility objected they would not be allowed to do so. It only happens because either the absent parent doesn't know, has agreed, or simply hasn't objected. (Guess which sucker was doing unpaid reception duty in a school when a father did decide to object rather loudly:eek: ).

In this case it seems that she can go ahead then as her new partner has parental responsiblity and is likely to give permission. Even if her ex had parental responsibility if he was not contacted to ask and the school did not know of his whereabouts it wouldn't cause a problem. A known as is just that, it isn't a legal name so it should really not be a problem. My daughter has done that and the school didn't query it at all. I just wrote a letter in which my daughter signed, explaining that she wished to be known as her new surname and it was done.

BTW if the new step parent has parental responsibility, why is the other parent still paying maintenance? If a child is adopted then the natural parent loses all rights and that includes responsibilities for maintenance. It is good that he is still paying even though on the face of it, it looks like he doesn't have to.

I wouldn't look to change the name legally yet, just ask to be known as after all, the surname is not often used and it really doesn't matter in the overall scheme of things. When they are old enough if they still feel the same then they will be free to do it themselves without having to ask permission from anybody.