Partner dismissed - am in despair

Milkshock

RobertoMoir wrote: »

For someone who was worried about the OP getting help a few posts ago, you're certainly not helping now by engaging in discussion of your problems in their thread.

people dragged me into it

anyway yes for the op's sake my advice to her is still the same get your partner to get in touch with the union and see what they can do.

at the very least they will know if there is any chance of a semi-dignified exit available to him.

warez22

Wow - thanks for all the replies.

Unfortunately we dont have income protection.

Yes he does work for Royal Mail.

I agree, I think he's out. He is going to contact the union tomorrow just to make sure that everything is done properly and hopefully get the best possible outcome.

He has worked there for 6 years so it's quite a biggy on his cv.

I will see tomorrow at work whether I can go full time - but even then he will need to find some sort of work.

With regard to the drugs - I think he does mean it. Time will tell.

Totally fed up that he has done this to me and the children. But silver lining and all that maybe this will be a new start for him drug free which will have a HUGE impact on me and the kids.

x

ILW

Are the unions now interested in sorting deals for people who use illegal drugs at work. Glad my subs are not helping.

Sambucus_Nigra

Milkshock wrote: »

people dragged me into it

No they didn't. You were asked not to give advice if you didn't have any understanding of employment law. It was you who said your one experience qualified you to give advice.

Which was later confirmed by you as being all in your head.

hjsmum

warez22 wrote: »

Wow - thanks for all the replies.

Unfortunately we dont have income protection.

Yes he does work for Royal Mail.

I agree, I think he's out. He is going to contact the union tomorrow just to make sure that everything is done properly and hopefully get the best possible outcome.

He has worked there for 6 years so it's quite a biggy on his cv.

I will see tomorrow at work whether I can go full time - but even then he will need to find some sort of work.

With regard to the drugs - I think he does mean it. Time will tell.

Totally fed up that he has done this to me and the children. But silver lining and all that maybe this will be a new start for him drug free which will have a HUGE impact on me and the kids.

x

Good luck, hope everything works out as well as can be expected.

Milkshock

Sambucus_Nigra wrote: »

No they didn't. You were asked not to give advice if you didn't have any understanding of employment law. It was you who said your one experience qualified you to give advice.

Which was later confirmed by you as being all in your head.

what was confirmed as being in my head?

Milkshock

warez22 wrote: »

Wow - thanks for all the replies.

Unfortunately we dont have income protection.

Yes he does work for Royal Mail.

I agree, I think he's out. He is going to contact the union tomorrow just to make sure that everything is done properly and hopefully get the best possible outcome.

He has worked there for 6 years so it's quite a biggy on his cv.

I will see tomorrow at work whether I can go full time - but even then he will need to find some sort of work.

With regard to the drugs - I think he does mean it. Time will tell.

Totally fed up that he has done this to me and the children. But silver lining and all that maybe this will be a new start for him drug free which will have a HUGE impact on me and the kids.

x

good luck let us know how you got on.

KiKi

Milkshock wrote: »

what was confirmed as being in my head?

PLEASE TAKE THIS TO YOUR THREAD so that the OP can get the help she needs on here.

(And yes, I know I'm not the boss of this thread, but it's disrespectful to the OP. )

Thanks
KiKi

donquine

warez22 wrote: »

I will see tomorrow at work whether I can go full time - but even then he will need to find some sort of work.

With regard to the drugs - I think he does mean it. Time will tell.

Totally fed up that he has done this to me and the children. But silver lining and all that maybe this will be a new start for him drug free which will have a HUGE impact on me and the kids.

You said in your original post that he had finally reached "rock bottom"- has he refused help before? Is he now making positive noises?

You sound fed up, but you don't sound as if this is the last straw? It sounds like your OH has done something stupid and you're annoyed, not that you would actually leave him if he didn't actively make steps to try and address his problem. Does he realise how important becoming drug free is to you and the kids? This is a pretty big thing.

If you work full time, who will look after the kids? If your OH is so addicted to drugs he does them at work (which everyone knows is a stupid idea), are you confident he won't do drugs when looking after your children (which is an even stupider idea)? If he is truly an addict, just because he says he won't do something, even if he does mean it, doesn't mean he'll stick to his word.

custardy

warez22 wrote: »

Wow - thanks for all the replies.

Unfortunately we dont have income protection.

Yes he does work for Royal Mail.

I agree, I think he's out. He is going to contact the union tomorrow just to make sure that everything is done properly and hopefully get the best possible outcome.

He has worked there for 6 years so it's quite a biggy on his cv.

I will see tomorrow at work whether I can go full time - but even then he will need to find some sort of work.

With regard to the drugs - I think he does mean it. Time will tell.

Totally fed up that he has done this to me and the children. But silver lining and all that maybe this will be a new start for him drug free which will have a HUGE impact on me and the kids.

x

okay then
well RM does have a drugs policy and there is some help within the business
however the 'pushing' incident wont help

to quote the RM document

Help is available to individuals who seek it and who are prepared to cooperate with treatment and rehabilitation that supports work retention.

Individuals, including relatives in the household, may obtain assistance by calling our employee assistance programme, HELP (help line) on 0800 6888 777. Counseling, including referral to external sources for help and support, as appropriate, is available through this service.

Managers may refer people to Occupational Health Services for support, treatment, rehabilitation, assessment, fitness for work, and general advice. A full list of services can be found in the guidelines.

Help is still available if sought after misconduct has occurred, though seeking help after misconduct does not avoid any consequences of misconduct

I'm going to pm you the links as to where you can find the full documents on the drugs & alcohol policy and guidance document