Stupid embarassing question alert

peachyprice

jakes-mum wrote: »

I was always a huge control freak and I did everything, then I fell ill and he had to take over and even worse I had to let him! I still cook and do the bills but I worry that if anything happened to me what would he and the kids do? DS i a coeliac, would he learn to cook and if so remember DS's food cant be mixed with ours nor the utensils? would he remember to take meat out for dinner? stupid things but they worry me

This bit, I think, could be at the root of your dreams. You're worried that your children won't be looked after properly, they'd be left with your OH who doesn't understand how to look after them as you want. You're worried about relinquishing them to the horrors of not being cared for in the way they need.

It may help if you sat down with your OH and put an 'action plan' in place and made him aware of all the things you're worried about. Even write everything down in a book together and keep it somewhere safe and tell the children where it is, add to it as you think of things that are worrying you.

Just the act of doing this could be enough to put your mind at ease because you know that you've done something positive towards it rather than trying to tell him verbally and getting the feling it's going i one ear and out the other.

jakes-mum

Good morning everyone

Well after talking to you all, I went to bed and started to think about what everyone had said and finally realised what I was scared of (than you to the poster about bullying as that started me of thinking about schools etc).

As I said DS has had a bit of a bad time at school its got to the stage of last years teacher not even turning round before saying 'I know who that is'

Now each year for the last 3 - 4 years i've said I wanted to move his school and got shouted down, now that sending him to a different school to his peers is being threatened all the old guilt is coming back. I allowed him to carry on being in a surrounding that was not good for him with teachers who judged him before they met him.

I think the man I cant see is my own guilt and the torture is what has happened at school (I hope that makes sense)

Anyway, I went to sleep and the dream was gone, even before I dozed off I couldn't bring the image to mind it just kept slipping away to other things :j

So thank you so much everyone for 1) convincing me we were not about to be kidnapped :rotfl: and 2) making me explore my own fears to find out what was wrong.

And you are all right, I really need to start doing something about teaching DH about how to run a household, though you never know it could be he can do all these things but he's just a lazy so and so :rotfl:

Peakma

Glad you slept better last night!
I asked my partner, how he interpreted your dream, only told him the basic dream,and funnily enough, he said pretty much said what you just have.
The building= your mind
Pyscho= yourself and your guilt.

No experts, but glad you seem to be on the right track. Still can't believe someone suggested pharmaceutical drugs, seriously hope that was a bad joke! If not, it's worrying, hope their kids aren't all on Ritalin, because they are "hardwork"!!

peachyprice

I'm so glad you've got to the root of it, it's amazing the way our mind forces us to think about things.

Hopefully getting pro-active will banish those nightmares forever.

adamantine

so glad you got to the bottom of it and i was able to help a bit even if i was trying to take a total stab in the dark lol.

jakes-mum

Thank you everyone, im really glad i've got to the bottom of it too, told DH this morning (I think he thought I was bit barmy to be honest) but after I explained it all to him he said that it made sense. I'm just glad my sub concious isnt torturing my baby anymore! I did feel terrible thinking something like that :eek:

Still haven't sorted the whole school thing out but at least its made me start giving how im going to sort it some serious thought. We've agreed to go to the catchments schools open day aswell as the one I want him to go to so I can talk to the teachers there aswell, express my concerns and get some serious information on there policies for talented children. DH hoping this will set my mind at rest and stop me worrying about him should we not be able to afford bus fare and send him to other school.

NAR

Peakma wrote: »

No experts, but glad you seem to be on the right track. Still can't believe someone suggested pharmaceutical drugs, seriously hope that was a bad joke!

I'm no expert either, nor (like you) do I know the medical or mental physology of the OP. That is why I suggested they see their GP.

Whether anything was prescribed or not would have been down to the GP not me. So no, it was not a bad joke.

As to your reference to Ritalin (whatever that is) and my kids; fyi my kids are both in their 20's and have never had the need for any medication, so stick to being an @rse and worry no more!

Peakma

NAR wrote: »

I'm no expert either, nor (like you) do I know the medical or mental physology of the OP. That is why I suggested they see their GP.

Whether anything was prescribed or not would have been down to the GP not me. So no, it was not a bad joke.

As to your reference to Ritalin (whatever that is) and my kids; fyi my kids are both in their 20's and have never had the need for any medication, so stick to being an @rse and worry no more!

I am sorry if I caused you offence, the Ritalin comment wasn't really required.
But in my defence I am not an @rse! It just concerns me, that we live in a world where people think they can sort their problems out either by spending money, or popping pills.
I don't trust the pharmaceutical industry, they want people to be addicts to there goods, they don't want cures ,or for people heal themselves.
Gps don't always look for the root of a cause, they look to solve the symptom, often causing a different symptom. They don't have the time.
The amount of people on anti depressants is ridiculous, how many of these people have dealt with the issues that caused the depression, and how many have buried it and added another one to the mound?!
Look to yourself for the answers. Think for yourself, take personal responsibility.

NAR

Peakma wrote: »

I am sorry if I caused you offence, the Ritalin comment wasn't really required.

Fair enough and I apologise for name calling. I don't disagree with most of what you have said above, but you should not have put your own interpertation on my post to make it sound different to what was intended.
So :beer: and have a nice weekend.