PBR's "M" for "mortgage" diary!

Lois_E

poorbutrich wrote: »

Hi there! I did notice that you'd been "thanking" - I was just in a bad mood earlier on. Since that post, I've been out, got knocked over by a cyclist who was doing about 80mph on the pavement outside my house, went to a very positive business workshop where I was praised by someone whom I greatly admire for my frugality :cool:, laid the foundations for possibly snagging a new client and got into a cupboard because I thought it was a lift, so am feeling a lot better. Bruised and worried about the baby after its encounter with a speeding bike, but better!

Wow what an eventful day. Glad you are feeling better. It's really scary when you think something might have harmed your baby, but try not to worry too much about the baby and the bike - babies are really remarkably well cushioned while they're in there, and it takes a really bad injury to the mother to do any damage to the baby. Almost all those "fell downstairs and lost baby" type stories are fiction rather than real life.

poorbutrich wrote: »

Thank you for sharing your story :A-I really hope you didn't think I was moaning at you. I believe that the benefits system is a support so that if things don't work out, then there's something to fall back on. Sorry to hear about your situation and massive kudos to you for working when the circumstances would seem to prefer that you didn't. I really admire people who work for a living when it would be far easier to sit back and not work for the same (or more money).

Thank you also for the lovely comments about the little person. I too hope the birth is easy! And if the little one takes after its father rather than its mother, then it should be a wonderful addition

No, I didn't think you were moaning at me, and thank you for such a positive response. I too get infuriated by the huge numbers of people who make a lifestyle choice not to work, but I have learnt that people respond to incentives, and it's natural to claim whatever the system tells you you are allowed to claim. Lifestyle benefit claimants, MP's claiming expenses (apart from the specifically fraudulent ones), people on the grabbit board here, bankers receiving bonuses... they're all different aspects of the same basic instinct to accept what is offered to you if you're told you're entitled to it. As sarahevie has pointed out, the problem is with the benefit rules that incentivise all the wrong things by making people better off if they don't work. How to fix it, though, is a huge question that I'm certainly not clever enough to answer. And as several of you have said, I know I'd prefer my life to theirs and I wouldn't want to swap.

basscadette

poorbutrich wrote: »

Welcome Bascadette!

Thanks for your comments. After talking to people, who, like you say, get £600 a month in tax and working credits, I thought we would get something similar or a bit less after recent changes. To do the calculations and get a big fat zero was a bit of a blow though! I thought I'd typed with such desperation that I'd broken the website calculator and did it about five or six times before the bad news sunk in!

Someone in my family got a new laptop for free in some sort of government IT scheme for families a couple of years ago. I'd work from 8am to 6pm -then onto my evening job, then when I'd come home at midnight and see a whole string of rubbish on FB that she (and her 9 year old, also on FB) had been doing all day - Farmville, Poker etc etc while I'd been working to pay for it!

I must stop ranting! I was in a terrible funk yesterday but have tried not to talk about it today, having drawn up a very meagre budgetary plan with DH yesterday. I have also put down the Thomas Hardy novel which I'd been reading as DH said it was probably contributing to my moaning!

I've just subscribed to your diary too and am stunned at everything you've achieved in just one post! To take on a house to do up, start a business that is already successful and a baby on the way! :A

I will be following your diary with interest! When is your little one due?

Due 18th October! Was a little unexpected to say the least - don't think we would have embarked on such a large project knowing we had a baby on the way - which we didn't when we signed the contract at the end of Januray :rotfl:

In another way, it's a blessing. We had a one bed flat which had a bigger mortgage than this lovely cottage. It was bought by DH at the top of the market, full whack and paid more for it than any other similar flat in the area. SO I totally understand your frustration about overpaying - I was really upset about the flat and just couldn't get over it - it had nothing going for it. I cannot believe someone paid us for it (albeit less than OH paid).

I have subscribed to your journey. Good luck also on your pregnancy - you must be due a month after me?

I'm looking forward to pinching some good ideas off you

starnac

Hi PBR just had a catch up of your diary. I totally agree with your rant. It infuriates me that people think that the government/this country owes them something. I made a conscious decision to have children and as such do not expect anyone to foot the bill (although it would be nice ) When we bought our first house DH and I had nothing (me just graduated, him living with parents) we had hand me downs of pretty much everything and took our time over the next few years buying things and doing the house up. It was hard but we look back now (in a different house with furniture from afore mentioned house starting to do this one up *rolls eyes*) and I see on FB someone I know well who has just been given a HA house, a grant to redecorate, HA are putting in a new kitchen and bathroom before she moves in *cos she's got a 12month old* and she's still complaining cos she wants a perfect house and they won't pay for new curtains!!!! :eek: :mad:

I then force myself to look at what I've got

1. A roof over my head
2. A lovely DH
3. A beautiful DD
4. An equally beautiful DS on the way (not that I'm biased or anything )

and I think "The house may not be perfect but we have paid for this ourselves (ignoring the fact the bank paid for most of it ) and we do not rely on the government to give us handouts."

I like to imagine myself being like my grandfather in the months before he died and telling my grandkids how "yes it was hard but they were the best years of my life" (He had dementia )

oops this turned into a VERY long post. Sorry

basscadette

poorbutrich wrote: »

That's lovely - your grandfather and your list of good things! Always a good idea to remind ourselves of how lucky we are. I am blaming my hormones for making me slip into negativity last week!

We're doing parts of our house up too (in fact, I say "we"; I went out yesterday afternoon to meet a couple of friends and when I got back, DH had decorated the spare room ready for the baby - :A :jit was like Changing Rooms or its modern equivalent!) There's a real satisfaction in making the house the way you want and bringing in furniture that means something rather than having it all presented to you brand new.

Hand-me-downs are the way forward over here as well! As a child, it was pretty much what I grew up with and I remember my mum's friends bringing over bags of clothes for us and just being so grateful - it was like Christmas! Our little one will be the same hopefully!

I managed to continue to be frugal over the weekend - mostly by luck rather than judgement. I was so thrilled with DH for decorating the spare room that I thought I'd cook him a Sunday lunch (this was about 4pm now!). I went to get him a chicken that was £9. I put it down while taking some bubble wrap from the bananas (I use this for wrapping my eBay parcels - the bubble wrap, not the bananas. The supermarkets just throw it away and buy more). When I came back, the chicken had been reduced to £1.50, so it was a frugal (but late) Sunday lunch for my lovely DH! Perhaps I should end there, rather than mentioning that DH actually ended up cooking his lunch himself......

Lol at the chicken - fantastic bargain. Now squirrel £7.50 away as you were going to spend it anyway And hey, you're pregnant - DH's need to chip in. WIsh mine could cook - with my aches and pains the closest I get to a meal out of him is Tortellini (you know that stuff you shove in boiling water for five minutes and serve :rotfl:)

starnac

have to admit my DH is lovely when it comes to cooking and things. he has no problem taking over the cooking if I'm tired. I have promised him more homecooked meals now I've finished work but he's been on lates this week so I usually eat with DD and he gets something at work so it hasn't happened yet. I have made 2 loaves of bread though so it's a start.

I thought I'd subscribed to this thread but it's not showing up so will have to try it again.

lilly_of_the_valley_2

Hi Poorbutrich

Welcome to the MF journey, I just started on this board to.... Congratulations on your little bundle of joy on the way:T

Lilly

starnac

I hope the invoice doesn't include the work that was never finished??

poorbutrich wrote: »

While it did look good for a week or so, now our bedroom is being subsumed by all of the baby stuff that I'm accumulating slowly but surely!

this makes me feel bad. All our baby stuff is still in the attic :eek: Maybe I should start getting organised oops

starnac

nice work putting it all on his side. When I had DD we put the moses basket on my side as I was BF so thought it would be easier so that I didn't disturb DH too much in the night as he had to work during the day. I ended up having so many stitches that it was so painful to sit up that it took me ages - by which time DH would be awake with DD's crying. We ended up moving the moses basket to his side so that he could pick her up and pass her to me to feed. he got more sleep that way!!

We've got ricketty ladders so I send DH up the attic anyway

poorbutrich

starnac wrote: »

I ended up having so many stitches that it was so painful to sit up that it took me ages - by which time DH would be awake with DD's crying.

Oh poor you, that's awful. I hope those aren't necessary this time.

Well, what a day. I nearly reached for a bottle of wine before I realised that I am not supposed to do that. Will have to be a very un-:money: bar of chocolate instead.

My MSE intentions have been totally thwarted this week. It's payday later, but most of the money has already been earmarked to head straight out again. It's when I'm in this sort of hopeless "what's the point" mood that I cheer myself up by buying a book or CD, but this time I will rise above it by turning the computer off and reading a library book when I get home after meeting someone this evening.

Having said that, I have been visited by an angel who has brought me all the remaining baby things that I need; I will of course return these when she has her next one....:)

Also on the bright side, I managed to pop into the shop for milk and came out with nothing but milk - a first for me!!

poorbutrich

Boy am I glad it's Saturday! I had planned a nice lie in but my body had different ideas and I was wide awake at 5am!

DH is back tonight after two weeks. I was planning to take him out, but I've decided that I'll cook to save some pennies. I'll just turn the lights down and light some candles, so he thinks I'm being romantic. The real reason is, of course, so that he can't see what the food looks like.

I also have to make a cake for a fundraising event I'm at tomorrow. Having read the book of the new film "I don't know how she does it", it looks like my buying a cake and putting icing sugar trick is going to be spotted, so with a bit of help from Mary Berry, I'm going to attempt a carrot cake with carrots from our garden!

I've also promised myself that after dashing all over the country (for work, so can claim fuel expenses back), that I won't use the car this weekend. Also got some freelance work to do, so that's not a bad moneysaving weekend all in all. Have a good one everyone!!