What to do when a partner/spouse dies.

SmlSave

I believe its best to go to a solicitor for making a Will because if there are any problems (i.e. arguing, saying the deceased wasn't mentally capable etc) then a solicitor has more 'standing' and usually keeps notes on how the deceased was when making the Will.

They differ in price from solicitor to solicitor so I'd ring round for some quotes.

sarah016

Have a holiday. Try to avoid to thinking about him/her.

consultant31

sarah016 wrote: »

Have a holiday. Try to avoid to thinking about him/her.

If only it were that easy - it's plain to see you've not been in this awful situation yet, but trust me, a holiday will not make the pain go away!

catatonia_2

Hi all, firstly, apologies for taking this slightly off on a tangent but I dont know where to post this. My ex husband died just after Christmas last year and we (his brother and I) are still trying to sort out pension monies for the children. There was an inquest after his sudden death (we had been divorced under 6 months) and his brther wanted to wait until coroners report was issued. This has now been done and has given no answers.
I guess I have a couple of questions - which trusts are the easiest to set up with two trustees (namely his bro and I) living a fair distance apart - are there online accounts? There will be approx 5k each (3 kids all under 9) and annual deposits of about £300.
Who should the pension company deal with? I was executor of the will but that is redundant after decree absolute, and will states both sets of parents next but pension house and us feel this is unecessary so can proceed without grant of probate - is this correct? Can I just set accounts up and ask for money to be deposited?
I'd really like this to be settled in the next couple of weeks as the 1st anniversary of his death is looming and I'd like to start afresh next year...
Many thanks for any help x

Mary_Hartnell

What was the total value of your late ex husband's estate? Only 15K ?

catatonia_2

Yes Mary. No insurance and no assets. Debts have been settled now.
Sadly this is the legacy of an alcoholic.

sarymclary

catatonia wrote: »

Yes Mary. No insurance and no assets. Debts have been settled now.
Sadly this is the legacy of an alcoholic.

Catatonia, I have been through exactly the same thing - although I never quite managed to get divorced before he drank himself to death, so as his next of kin I had to deal with all his debt too, but no insurances, etc. I lost the house, and pretty much everything else, as well as being told me and the 4 children (aged 3 to 12) were totally to blame for it, by his family! It's not easy, and I do understand how hard it is.

Have you considered asking Citizens Advice what might be the right thing to do with the money? I would think setting up an account for each of them (or joint names between you and the other Trustee), allowing for the £300 deposits to be made (is this from a previous employer?) would be appropriate, and asking for copies of statements to be sent to both of you. Doing this all online may be tricky, but if you were to ring a couple of the banks locally to ask what options they can offer, then it may then just be a case of making you both counter-signatories on accounts in the children's names. Bear in mind though, that the savings accounts for my own children at LTSB were automatically reverted into their own names, without the need for a counter-signatory once they reached age 12.

You also need to consider what safeguards you need to have in place should either one of you countersignatories die (horrid thought I know).

As I was left to deal with everything alone, and there were no savings left for the children, just a small employer's pension paid monthly, I simply used the savings accounts they already had (although I have still yet to get the bank to take my dead husband's name off one account - despite form filling, appointments, letters & phone calls)!

PM me if you want to chat anytime.

Mary_Hartnell

Sorry folks this is American spam.
Here in the UK the rules differ north and south of the border - confusing the issue with what happens over the pond will not help.

debtfreein4years

Im trying in vain to get my parents to set up wills, they are both relativly young (44 & 45) but neither of them think a will is a nessesity! They have a joint mortgage and each have life insurances, but neither get that although they have talked with me about what they want to happen to their estates, unless they put it in writing it wont happen. Is there anything I can do to get them to set up a will? Im thinking of going and setting up an appointment with a solicitor and taking them along and getting them to do it then and there but i dont want them to feel forced into it - they are in scotland so that makes a slight difference with that at home will kits.

it is driving me mad as my granddad died suddenly last year before christmas and although mum and dad both said they would do their wills asap neither of them has done it yet. I dont care about any possible inheritance, all i want to do is make sure that either myself or my brother are able to comply legally with their respective wishes without any fighting in the family about what they would want.

Twopints

Have you got a will?

If so, then talk to them about it, if not tell them you are making one and ask for their thoughts on it. You can use this as a way to explain what will happen if they do not have one i.e. the rules of intestacy that apply to estates where no will is left.