Sympathy Flowers - Help Needed

tesuhoha

Thank you for your suggestions. I will have a look at the links+. I do intend to visit but not while the grief is so fresh and raw and the family have drawn together. I've already sent a card with a message of support but whilst my daughter is leaving flowers at the side of the road I would like to send them something to comfort them. The flower card looks like a nice idea.

peachyprice

You could by your own flowers, it's so much cheaper if you walk into a florist and ask for a bouquet rather than funeral flowers, or get them from wherever you can afford, then take them to the cemetery/crematorium on the day of the funeral.

They usually have sections marked with the name of the deceased, they will be able to tell you the time of the service and you can pop there discreetly before and lay them. The family usually look at the flowers and gather the cards before they leave.

tesuhoha

I'm going to send flowers to the funeral as well but this is for the family.

NuttyFaggot

If you think you will be intruding, may I suggest you take a bunch of flowers (from Tescos or somewhere similer) and leave them outside with a card, knock on the door and leave? Believe me, you won't be intruding if you knock on the door and say hello, for you, something, anything - the personal touch will mean more to her than you will ever (hopefully) know.

Thought it might be worth mentioning the family may want "family flowers only" at the funeral, they may want people to donate to a charity or something. Some people sent flowers for my husbands funeral which was nice but one person sent a wreath. At the end of the service I had to take the flowers home and put them in vases but I had no idea what to do with the wreath! It ended up outside on the patio table

poppy_f1

does your friend like flowers?

reason i ask is we got inundated with flowers when my dad died, but both me and mum hate getting flowers as we see them as a waste of money


we got more out of a sympathy card with a few nice words written

jaybee

Maybe a plant - rose bush or something that could be in their garden to be a lasting memory.

NuttyFaggot

I understand what you are saying poppy_f1 but sometimes it is not about what the recipients like/dislike it is about the giver being able to express their feelings. Not everyone can write "a few nice words" but feel they can "say it with flowers". Hope that makes sense, probably not though

SUESMITH_2

like people have said pop round with a card and some nice supermarket flowers - you can get amazing ones from supermarkets for £10.

when my mum died unexpectedly i wasn't bothered about flowers or gifts, the things that meant the most to me was cards and kind things people said about my mum. my friend sent me a card with a note saying she had popped £5 into a charity tin and my mum would have loved that, some good coming out of bad.

CRANKY40

I'm a widow. Just go and give your friend a big hug. You don't have to stay.

Errata

tesuhoha wrote: »

I want to send some sympathy flowers but I have looked online at Interflora etc and they are so expensive. It would cost me about £35. I am not being mean. I can't afford this as my husband is being laid off this week and I will also want to send a wreath. The recipients would probably think I was being over the top as well.

I don't want to buy some and take them around as its my friend and her 25 year old son has been killed in a motorcyle accident. I don't want to intrude on their grief and they would probably feel obliged to invite me in when they just want to be private.

Has anyone any suggestions about this how I could send some. I could afford £20.

I think at this point a card with a few words about what a great lad he was and asking if there is anything you can do for your friend to help with anything would be appropriate.
Wreaths are usually the remit of close family members, with others sendng sprays, unless it's the done thing in your community and/or culture for everyone not related to send wreaths.