Trying for a Baby Part 7

codemonkey

atton - why dont you head over to the weddings board if you havent already. They have great suggestions how to reduce reception costs.

comp - you're a really good friend. Its hard not to feel that the world is really unfair sometimes.

hugs for tinks, elsie, birdie and flee and anyone else on cd1.

And hugs for Holche I have no idea, but didnt want to ignore you. Have you tested since the bleeding? Hopefully someone who has been through a similar situation will come along soon.

no elfin idea whats going on here. Had spotting 8dpo then stopped and started again at midnight 9dpo. Stopped again but have some light spotting now (11dpo) and cramps. Normally my lp is 16 days so i would have some spotting 14 and 15dpo leading straight into full flow AF at 16dpo so this isnt normal for me. I dont think its leading to a BFP though as I have AF cramps now. Sigh.

TeamLowe

Holche, have you been to your local EPU (early pregnancy unit) to make sure it is what you think it is? It's best to get checked out there anyway, as if all the pregnancy has not left your body then this can leave you open to infections

more importantly you have done nothing wrong and this isn't your fault.
around 60-70% are chromosonal, in the first few weeks of its life there's either a million or 100,000 cell changes necessary in the embryo, if just one of these goes wrong then the embryo won't make it. there's nothing anyone can do about this, it's just the luck of the draw.

unfortunately people don't talk about this enough and when it happens it can seem like it's only you, but it's a very regular occurence, especially as early as yours was. estimates vary from 1 in 5 pregnancies to 1 in 2 pregnancies end in miscarriage, which seems high but most ladies with early miscarriages don't realise they're pregnant and think it's a very heavy period.

There is a miscarriage support thread on here with lovely ladies who can give you practical and emotinal support.

i just want to say what i was told by the nurse who diagnosed mine (which was a 'missed' miscarriage, the baby had died but my body hadn't realised) apparently miscarriages with your first pregnancy are incredibly common because it's such a shock to the system and your body doesn't know what to do. the next time you get pregnant, it will know more what it's doing and you'll have a happy, healthy pregnancy.

Please please please please take good care of yourself and your partner, if the EPU offers counselling then put your name down, mine did and it was worth its weight in gold x x

TeamLowe

The doctors will suggest you wait one cycle after your miscarriage before you try again but that's purely for dating purposes. try when you feel ready, and there's plenty of ladies who conceive their forever babies straight after, it's supposedly makes you more fertile x x

Please don't use tampons for the bleeding as your cervix is open so you'll be prone to infection, when you visit the EPU they'll probably give you precautionary antibiotics. Personally i'd wait until the bleeding has stopped to have intercourse again for the same reason. No baths either, only showers
(sorry, just trying to remember the advice i was given, an infection could lead to Pelvic Inflammatory Disease which can severely impact your fertility) x x

Holche

TeamLowe - thank you for your kind words and advice. I have phoned the local EPU and they said to see how I feel in a few days and that the bleeding should have stopped by then. They did say that there was nothing they could do as they wouldn't scan me at such an early stage. If I was worried I should visit my doctor.

mrsj28

Hi ladies :hello:

Big big ((hugs)) for all those with CD1/AF Where are our August BFPs? :huh:

COMP - you are an amazing friend. Big ((hugs)) it's been such a difficult time for you. Hope you will be looking at your baby at an ultrasound very soon.

Holche - sending ((hugs)) - TeamLowe's advice sounds brilliant

Atton - hope you can find a way to have your wedding and enjoy a positive fresh start with your OH. Lots of great advice from others about how to make a wedding cheap - your wedding day is important, but your marriage is much much more important!

TeaLover - hope the follicle tracking is all going ok. Fingers crossed Clomid will do the trick this cycle

AFM - I had my ultrasound last week to check my ovaries (they had to do it internally which was a bit of a surprise!). The sonographer wasn't very helpful and didn't tell me much or show me the screen, but she did say there are more follicles than normal so it's PCOS I have to see the GP next week to get the 'proper' results. It's what I was expecting really, but it's still not great news. I had a lovely chat with my mum about it all - she didn't even know we were ttc, so I think it was a bit of a shock for her, and she is being very supportive and saying all the right things! She has even offered to pay for us to have a private consultation with a FS which is amazingly generous of her. I'll wait and see what the GP says first.

Cramps here and skin looking terrible so I think AF is on the way - LilyMay I can totally relate to what you said about not being so disappointed now that I know we will probably need some help. If AF does come soon then at least I will have had a very normal length cycle!! (CD30 today).

QQ, thanks as always for doing the lists!

Have a good day ladies!

tea_lover

holche - so sorry you're going through this. Fingers crossed it all turns out ok.
mrsj28 - hugs for PCOS. But it's definitely one of the more 'treatable' things so hopefully won't cause you any problems.
comp - big hugs for you. You've done amazingly well to support your friend, just things of all the good things karma will be sending your way now! Think your story must have stayed with me as had a dream on sat that I was pg but it wasn't OH's:eek:. Was sobbing my eyes out as I knew I had to tell him and I didn't know what to do. Woke up in a right state and then wouldn't let go of him all night lol.
codemonkey - hope the cramps don't turn into AF.
flee - good luck with your dr's appt. Do you have one yet?
lemonmelon - hope the high turned into a peak (or however it works!)
birdie85 - I'm missing the Olympics already! What do we watch now?
elsie - hugs for AF arriving x.

Soooo tired today. Watched the closing ceremony (not great but felt like I needed to stick with it for some reason). Was just dragging myself off to bed when we decided a spontaneous BD was a good idea. Which it was.... but am even more tired now lol. Still, was great to have a bit of passion as it's definitely been feeling a bit "let's get it over with" lately.

TeamLowe

belly is much better today ladies thank you, thanks to drinking nearly a whole medium sized bottle of gaviscon! lol
yesterday was laaavely, roast was lush, hilton was gorgeous, really want to stay there again, don't think premier inns will be good enough in future! lol

we had a chat Saturday night about being 'in it to win it' but i think it worked as we BDed twice yesterday but again that's guna probably be the hotel lol
out of curiousity, anyone know what happens to sperm counts if it's in quick sucession, well hours apart? surely there's diminishing returns, is it like 3 mil first time, 2 mil second etc? x x

fraz_babe

Hi ladies can i join your thread please?

Me and my OH have been not trying but not preventing for a few months but we have decided to ttc since july. I had my af on 3rd august and it properly finished 9th august.

I brought a clearblue fertility monitor and sticks but i am lost how to use it - i have been trying mess with it how to set my cycle but i dont know how it wont go past one or just resets!

I have been trying the cheap internet ovulation tests but im not sure how to use them as never used them before so i dunno whats positive or negative lol! I was wondering does anyone know if they're very accurate?

Also i have read having sex too much ca sometimes lower your chances because of the sperm. Does anyone believe this? I'm not sure. We have had sex the past 3 nights and i was hoping every night up until im due (not regular so im not sure when i am due) as i dont want miss my chance. Or are we best doing it every few days?

Sorry for all the questions i am not really up on the ovulation stuff etc as i fell pregnant straight away with my son not planned and i had a unplanned pregnancy last august i got my bfp baby was wanted though but sadly had a mc in september. Really want another xx

sorry for the long post

xx

TeamLowe

hi fraz babe, hope you're not with us long but enjoy your time whilst you are sorry to hear of your loss x x
can't help with the monitor i'm afraid, but the sperms and regular BDing...
the only issue with every day is if your partner is known to have a low sperm count, so every couple of days will help him to build it up, but if his count is fine then there's no issues and considering you've conceived twice before i wouldn't worry too much
the medical opinion is always to have intercourse at least every 2-3 days throughout your cycle so that there is always live sperm for when the egg decides to show her mischeivous face
so if you and DH can keep up with every day then that's great, otherwise, every 2-3 days should see you up the duff in no time :rotfl:x x

mrsj28

hi fraz babe :wave: welcome to the thread!

And welcome to all other newbies I have missed in the last week or so!