Depression

EthelBloggs

Also.. because you got your mp to step in before.. you've got evidence that you aren't just being an overprotective mum.. I think you've got a good chance

Karrie

EthelBloggs wrote:

Karrie.. APPEAL!!!

I had the same situation with my son.. I didn't appeal and he went to the catchment school rather than the one he wanted.. he's now in year 10 and he hasn't been to school at all this year because of being bullied. His education has been ruined because I didn't know how to appeal and thought he'd be ok once he settled in. I was wrong and now I'm trying to find him a new school but it's the worst time because of GSCEs etc and schools arent willing to take in a new pupil at his stage.

Appeal and also ask them to keep his name on the list cos sometimes people who did get in don't take the place or they move or whatever and there'll be a few spaces after half term.

Hope that helps a bit

It does - thank you. Your poor son. I know exactly how you feel. I don't want to be seen to be one of "those" mums but I do want to stick up for what my son deserves. I feel this will ruin his education and his personality. He even said to me "the next 6 years are going to be the worst of my life." As a mum, I don't want him thinking like that but that's how he feels. It's bad enough when he goes out where we live, he shouldn't have to put up with it in school as well.

Good luck in finding your son a new school where he will be happy. Will keep my fingers crossed for you.

Horasio

I don't want to sound horrible but how did the bullying escalate to such a level?

I would think about moving house if nothing got done, different area and different school.

Karrie

CCStar wrote:

I don't want to sound horrible but how did the bullying escalate to such a level?

I would think about moving house if nothing got done, different area and different school.

You don't sound horrible at all and I understand why you ask. It took me a long time and a lot of hard work to get this house. I can't afford to sell up and move. We've been here three years. The boys took an instant dislike to my son as soon as we moved in and all their mates joined is, as they do. They don't go to his current school and have a reputation for being bad in school. Their school got a very bad Ofsted report. I have watched from a distance without any of them or my son knowing. I have seen them just rush up to him and push him off his bike for no reason. When I moved here 3 years ago, and when it started, I asked the boys why they were doing it (my son was 8) and they shrugged their shoulders and said "dunno". It just got worse from there. I've told my son he can't go out and he quite rightly replied "Why? I haven't done anything wrong." It's just worse and worse for him. I've stayed out of it as much as I can but now I just don't want him going outside anymore. We live in a cul-de-sac so he doesn't go far. Anyway, they are the reason he doesn't want to go to the school he's been allocated to. He feels that they will make his life hell there as well as at home. I am dreading the summer when they are out. The bully boys live a couple of roads away from us but always appear around our road.

learning_to_drive

Karrie,

Thank you. I have said this to him but it's just not registering. I had to get our local MP to arrange to have some bushes chopped because a gang of kids used to hide in them with broken bottles in hand, waiting to jump my son. Whilst I tend to leave him to stand up for himself most of the time, it's just so frightening that he has to put up with this. Bullying on line have given me great advise but it just hasn't stopped. The bullies look at me like I am a piece of sh!it and their parents don't give a toss. I am rambling now sorry..................... I can't keep ignoring it now. I just don't know what to do. We are going to appeal but ........... oh it's the depression but I am such a pessimist. Sorry to go on

First of all sorry to hear he is having such problems, bullying is one thing that when I start to teach (uni sept confirmed, christ i better send that letter!) I really intend to stamp out when I become a teacher, when I become a head (some day!) its something I wouldnt tolerate, its a terrible thing.

I wouldnt send him until he gets into his chosen school, it will do him more harm going if he is being bullied, its a tough thing to do, keep him off until something gets done, but appeal and get the MP involved. But teach him at home?

Not sure if its possible, but my 2 penneth, please dont apologise for ranting on, we are all here to support one another, you will never get anyone saying "just snap out of it" or anything because its the worst thing you can say to a depressed person.

learning_to_drive

Before all of this, I was such a strong strong person, never had issues and was just a bit of a b*stard at work and stuff. People really liked that, I was a strong character and no one could ever really say anything to me as I had no weaknesses. That thinking was silly, when this all happened I made the mistake of maybe telling too many people, the same individuals now use this as a stick to beat me with, and for a person with a comeback for everything, I cant really say anything back.

They will make snide comments, you are off your head, you are mad etc. It makes me sad, I need to fightback and get into a job where I can stick two fingers up at those sneering !!!!!!!s who think its hilarious that Steve fell down trying to better himself, and keep using it against him.

The fightback really must begin its time for energy, stamina, focus and drive. The hours must be put in, goodbye to the coast, welcome to the grind. Work is something I measured myself on, I will be a success and ram those doubts back down the throats of the doubters. "our greatest glory is not rising, but rising everytime we fall"

I will not let the doubters and people who laugh at me beat me, I will come back 100 times stronger having gone through this. I wont have people laughing at me either behind my back or over msn about my issues that I've had. I will bounce back harder and faster and smash them with their comments. Success means different things to different people, I have my own set of principles that guide me and drive me to better things.

I guess People will never understand why I got so passionate about JS and my job, Im all or nothing, I worked so bloody hard, only for it to all fall down, 2 years sheer !!!!!!!! off stuff, and I got dropped at the first opportunity. I have a recurring dream to return to JS, I keep dreaming about it, I havent been in the store since I left, even though our kid works there, people ask about me all the time. I cant do it. I cant, I have no desire to, its like an ex girlfriend I dont want to see again. Speaking of which, she ruined me too, too many coincidences, I dwell, I always have, I hate people getting one up on me, I hate it.

This has been brought on by a lass who I rejected for my ex, she then rejected me, then did it again after saying she fort we had summat together, I keep pressing her for an explanation, a proper one, we just end up fighting, then she said that about my ex, she found someone better in hull, which says a lot.

People know ive been through my issues, I need to fightback, dont accept second best, I need to atone for what has happened and build my way back up.

Karrie

learning_to_drive wrote:

Karrie,



First of all sorry to hear he is having such problems, bullying is one thing that when I start to teach (uni sept confirmed, christ i better send that letter!) I really intend to stamp out when I become a teacher, when I become a head (some day!) its something I wouldnt tolerate, its a terrible thing.

I wouldnt send him until he gets into his chosen school, it will do him more harm going if he is being bullied, its a tough thing to do, keep him off until something gets done, but appeal and get the MP involved. But teach him at home?

Not sure if its possible, but my 2 penneth, please dont apologise for ranting on, we are all here to support one another, you will never get anyone saying "just snap out of it" or anything because its the worst thing you can say to a depressed person.

I dithered about writing on here about this but I just knew some people would understand where I was coming from. It's so heartening for people to reply. Good luck in your new job and when you get your heads post Please please do all you can to stamp bullying out. It makes childrens lives a complete misery. I was wondering wether I should just not send him until he gets the place he deserves. I would hate for him to get to a crucial stage of his education to only have to remove him (like Ethelbloggs is going through at moment). Before he went to bed tonight, he said "This has been a bad day. I am already nervous incase we lose the appeal." Of course, I reassured him but I know what he means. I know what he is scared off. His Dad doesn't live local so it's left for me to deal with the bullies and the bigger they get the more apprehensive I get. I am rambling now. I am wondering if I should mention that I suffer from depression (and have done for many years) on the appeals form or is that way over the top. My son doesn't know, and I don't want him to know. To be honest, I would do anything for my son not to suffer during his education. He wants to be a sports physio and he needs the right education for him to carrying out his dream. Gonna shut up now As I said good luck :T

learning_to_drive

I dithered about writing on here about this but I just knew some people would understand where I was coming from. It's so heartening for people to reply. Good luck in your new job and when you get your heads post Please please do all you can to stamp bullying out. It makes childrens lives a complete misery. I was wondering wether I should just not send him until he gets the place he deserves. I would hate for him to get to a crucial stage of his education to only have to remove him (like Ethelbloggs is going through at moment). Before he went to bed tonight, he said "This has been a bad day. I am already nervous incase we lose the appeal." Of course, I reassured him but I know what he means. I know what he is scared off. His Dad doesn't live local so it's left for me to deal with the bullies and the bigger they get the more apprehensive I get. I am rambling now. I am wondering if I should mention that I suffer from depression (and have done for many years) on the appeals form or is that way over the top. My son doesn't know, and I don't want him to know. To be honest, I would do anything for my son not to suffer during his education. He wants to be a sports physio and he needs the right education for him to carrying out his dream. Gonna shut up now As I said good luc

Please please please do not apologise, we are an excellent bunch, very friendly and you only have to look back at some of my posts to see why I frequent daily and support all I can, I went through hell with money and jobs recently after being a relative success early in my life and I think had it not been for this place maybe the unthinkable would have happened and suicide attempt may have been made, I dont know but it got bad.

If he doesn't get into the school, then I dont see how you can send him Not being harsh or anything, but its effectively sending him into battle daily, schools that do nothing about bullying are as bad, obviously there are politics involved but Ill be ruthless from day one!

Its a terrible thing, basically just terrible, in year 5 I was bullied, never physical, just my friends would stop talking to me randomly, it was strange and we just grew out of it, but I stood up for myself and went off to make new friends in the end up, they soon realised. Its hard when its physical.

Sometimes a gesture such as keeping him off is the only thing you can do, there are loads of resources available on the internet, and subject textbooks can be purchased, naturally its no replacement for actual teaching, but it keeps him stimulated for learning if he is actively working whilst he is off. I would ensure that he keeps to a school day, no eating during lessons, otherwise bad habits can develop and you may find it harder getting him to school when he gets his place (which he will).

I would mention depression, other parents do all kinds of tricks, put their kid as living with their grandparents (nearer school) so that their postcode was in the catchment area and other tricks are played. You are genuine and shouldn't be afraid to do what it takes to get him into the school of his choice.

I understand the worry of failing with the appeal, I honestly wish you all the best, but prepare yourselves for the worst outcome, and have a decisive plan in place should the outcome not be what you want. I dont think sending him to the school he has been placed at is a viable option from what you have said, so make plans for home teaching (again, unsure if possible but you get the idea!) and then get the paper involved and other things such as MP's!

Good luck

Karrie

learning_to_drive wrote:

Please please please do not apologise, we are an excellent bunch, very friendly and you only have to look back at some of my posts to see why I frequent daily and support all I can, I went through hell with money and jobs recently after being a relative success early in my life and I think had it not been for this place maybe the unthinkable would have happened and suicide attempt may have been made, I dont know but it got bad.

If he doesn't get into the school, then I dont see how you can send him Not being harsh or anything, but its effectively sending him into battle daily, schools that do nothing about bullying are as bad, obviously there are politics involved but Ill be ruthless from day one!

Its a terrible thing, basically just terrible, in year 5 I was bullied, never physical, just my friends would stop talking to me randomly, it was strange and we just grew out of it, but I stood up for myself and went off to make new friends in the end up, they soon realised. Its hard when its physical.

Sometimes a gesture such as keeping him off is the only thing you can do, there are loads of resources available on the internet, and subject textbooks can be purchased, naturally its no replacement for actual teaching, but it keeps him stimulated for learning if he is actively working whilst he is off. I would ensure that he keeps to a school day, no eating during lessons, otherwise bad habits can develop and you may find it harder getting him to school when he gets his place (which he will).

I would mention depression, other parents do all kinds of tricks, put their kid as living with their grandparents (nearer school) so that their postcode was in the catchment area and other tricks are played. You are genuine and shouldn't be afraid to do what it takes to get him into the school of his choice.

I understand the worry of failing with the appeal, I honestly wish you all the best, but prepare yourselves for the worst outcome, and have a decisive plan in place should the outcome not be what you want. I dont think sending him to the school he has been placed at is a viable option from what you have said, so make plans for home teaching (again, unsure if possible but you get the idea!) and then get the paper involved and other things such as MP's!

Good luck

Awww you've got me blubbing now. Will reply tomorrow. Thank you so much. Good night

learning_to_drive

Awww you've got me blubbing now. Will reply tomorrow. Thank you so much. Good night

Take care, good night.