im in it big time,need help/advice.....

justruth

LOL Oh mate, we've all been here, that's why we all come to this website! The amounts and circumstances vary but at the end of the day we all got stuck and didn't know what to do! The best of it is we are all here for you, knowing EXACTLY how easy it is to get up a certain creek without a paddle, and as you talk to friends and family about the site, (you will, we all do) you will find that most of them are in just as deep but too scared to confront it.

It is a good idea though to have your paperwork in order ready for the CCCS call, they will send you out a pack to record things like SOA's and debts and everything. They are wonderful professionals who after hearing the full ins and outs of your personal financial situation will give you great advice on your next step. No one will judge you for taking positive action!

mickey66_2

hobo28 wrote:

Hi mate

I don't usually post anything here but read your story and really sympathise with you. I'm not an expert so I will leave the financial advice to others. Does your wife work?

You've taken the first big step which is acknowledging the problem which is great. if you haven't already done so, I would take a moment to figure out the root cause of the problem. Is it just over shopping on "stuff" or is there another reason? The reason I ask is that unless you find the root cause and address it, you'll end up coming around a full circle.

...isnt down to one particular thing,well apart from banks etc offering you credit all the time!,no its just down to 'living',nothing excessive,no flash holidays/cars/clothes etc,thats what makes it so hard to work out why im/we're in it up to our necks.

livinginhope

Hi mickey,just wanted to say hello and that I understand how you are feeling.Please don't go ahead with the remortgage,I think that should be the last thing you do,although I'm guessing from the amount you are paying,that the secured loan is a high rate,because the payments are very high.Work on the SOA and get your wife on board,we are always here.
LIH

chevalier

well done for posting - welcome. I will await your SOA so that we can pinpoint ways of cutting your costs.

However could either you or the Mrs get a second job? With the money from it paying off debt? Or could you get a better paying job than you have now?
best of luck
chev

mickey66_2

this SOE on here and give a list to the CCCS,what should i do about this:-my mother-in-law looks after the kids why we're at work etc,childminder if you like,and the thing is she had a part time job which she gave up to do this,we obviously pay her and both parties are happy, we're not getting shafted by normal childminding fees and she gets abit extra......do i declare this or not bit of a dilemma really,if we went legal wwe'd pay out more money.

sanfrancisco

mickey66 wrote:

this SOE on here and give a list to the CCCS,what should i do about this:-my mother-in-law looks after the kids why we're at work etc,childminder if you like,and the thing is she had a part time job which she gave up to do this,we obviously pay her and both parties are happy, we're not getting shafted by normal childminding fees and she gets abit extra......do i declare this or not bit of a dilemma really,if we went legal wwe'd pay out more money.

Is it alot of money?

The CCCS guidelines for food/bill/ clothes etc etc are quite generous, so you could "hide" the amount amongst other things.

ixwood

Good luck!!

CLAPTON

mickey66 wrote:

this SOE on here and give a list to the CCCS,what should i do about this:-my mother-in-law looks after the kids why we're at work etc,childminder if you like,and the thing is she had a part time job which she gave up to do this,we obviously pay her and both parties are happy, we're not getting shafted by normal childminding fees and she gets abit extra......do i declare this or not bit of a dilemma really,if we went legal wwe'd pay out more money.

just put down 'childminding ....£xxx
you dont have to say who its to, in exactly the same way you might say 'shopping £yyy'.. you dont have to say TESCO or whatever.

mickey66_2

spoke to CCCS today,very helpful,but my situation looks a bit grim.....basically i gave him all the info,and total debts were nearly £34k,they will suggest a budget which they will send through,but to become debt free will take roughly 10 years and cost me £280pm.

i feel totally destroyed at the moment,realising that i cant have a proper life for my family for at least 10years,but basically its my fault.

some of the budget ideas they suggest just wont work in my opinion,but i'll have to make them work.

feeling very down.

mickey66_2

Tustastic wrote:

Mick, I bet you're feeling down because at last you have put a figure to your debt and you can really understand the implications. But you had to do that to start sorting the problem out. Frankly my dear, the only way is up. Go and cuddle your family - they are much more important. Take care:)

Thanks.:o

i know ive gotta deal with it,but it just seems so unfair,just trying to live an 'honest' life has done this to me,seems the more err 'wrong' you are the better you get on.

sorry,i'll get over it,just feel low at the moment.