Child Care is costing us the equivelent of a mortgage!

Air_Cooled_75

Skintchick, you put it all brilliantly. You are so right about society not seeing the true value of parenting, it's tough job! I gave up work when we had our baby last year, DH earns more than I did but I could never put my baby in a nursery, the only one I ever went to was for a few hours at the community centre (I am 38 though, and I am aware that times have changed) We will be pretty skint for a few years but it's a small price to pay. I also so the report about children with 'behaviour issues' from not going to nursery but I haven't yet checked who carried it out or what demographic it looked at. By all accounts pretty much everyone in this country over a certain age should've had problems at 5 years old

DevilsAdvocate1

clearingout wrote: »

Sorry, but I have to disagree with this. My middle child has a major speech delay and it is NOT a result of my 'bad parenting', nor is it down to him having spent 'all the time in nursery' as I have only ever worked part- time and have been at home for the last 2 years full time, nor is it down to him still sucking a dummy or using a bottle at 4 years old (he never had either!). I was told by a SALT that this is an increasing problem, particularly amongst boys, but that there is generally no obvious cause. Certainly, my eldest child was very quick to develop speech and I have always received compliments on his very extensive vocabulary - and he spent far more time in childcare (although only ever part time) than the child who has the problem. Is is so very wrong to generalise in this way.

Obviously, I was not talking about you or any individual in particular, as I do not know you.

What got me started on this particular train of thought was an article that I read last week. The article was talking about how much less children of today know when they start school. It said that some had problems talking and others do not even know their name (I find this very, very hard to believe). Anyway, the upshot of the article was that it must be due to SAHMs not stimulating the children and it discussed what interventions could be put in place to stop the rise in children starting school with speech problems.

Anyway, a few pages further on was a different article discussing how more children than ever before go to nursery. And this got me thinking. If more children are going to nursery and more children are starting school with speech problems then why are SAHPs being blamed? If it was due to SAHPs then surely the opposite should be occurring, as more children are in nursery.

As I said in my original post, this is just my opinion. Hopefully, you can see where I was coming from. I think this is an area where there should be some research. If there is a correlation between nursery and speech problems then it should be looked into so that practices can be changed. If there is a connection, perhaps lower staff to children ratios would help. Or a smaller number of children in a room so there is less background noise.

Anyway, just my opinion and no more a generalisation than blaming SAHPs.

snookey

Why dont you try to get together with other parents in your area and see if you can share childcare. Maybe share the cost of a nanny.

**Patty**

DevilsAdvocate1 wrote: »

What got me started on this particular train of thought was an article that I read last week. The article was talking about how much less children of today know when they start school. It said that some had problems talking and others do not even know their name (I find this very, very hard to believe). Anyway, the upshot of the article was that it must be due to SAHMs not stimulating the children and it discussed what interventions could be put in place to stop the rise in children starting school with speech problems.

Any chance of a link/ google-able info? Wouldn't mind reading it myself.


Also, let's not forget that compared to 10-15 years ago.....children do start school much earlier in the UK.

I remeber reading a report somewhere a few years ago that stated in some Nordic countries children start school full-time at the age of 7......strangely enough there was no developmental detriment. The basis of the report was that since their minds are more mature at 7 than at say 3, their ability to absorb education at an advanced rate is also enhanced.

DevilsAdvocate1

**Patty** wrote: »

Any chance of a link/ google-able info? Wouldn't mind reading it myself.


Also, let's not forget that compared to 10-15 years ago.....children do start school much earlier in the UK.

I remeber reading a report somewhere a few years ago that stated in some Nordic countries children start school full-time at the age of 7......strangely enough there was no developmental deteriment. The basis of the report was that since their minds are more mature at 7 than at say 3, their ability to absorb education at an advanced rate is also enhanced.

It was a newspaper, but I was in a coffee shop at the time, so not sure which paper. Will do some googling tomorrow to see if I can find something online. Off to bed now.

mildred1978

Our childcare is costing us over £40k per year.

(I've taken voluntary redundancy in order to bring up our child myself.)

property.advert

It isn't just about looking after the child but educating them. Few stand ins or grandparents can do much of that in reality.

Childcare is very costly, prohibitively so for many but none of these costs were unknown or just came out of the blue did they ? If you can google and find this website, you could have found any number of websites which would tell you just how much you might receive in help and armed with that information, rather than a crate of alcopops, you could have made an informed decision on whether you could actually afford to have a child.

neverdespairgirl

**Patty** wrote: »

Also, let's not forget that compared to 10-15 years ago.....children do start school much earlier in the UK.

Really? I was born right at the end of the 70s, and started primary school at the age of 4 and 3 months, and left at the age of 10 and 3 months.

My son started year 1 at the age of 5 and 2 months, and has just finished that first year.

neverdespairgirl

property.advert wrote: »

It isn't just about looking after the child but educating them. Few stand ins or grandparents can do much of that in reality.

why not? My mother and father, or our nanny, are just as educational as I am.

vroombroom

£40k per year? I hope they have diamond encrusted gold spoons for their brekkie at that price:eek:

Once I've qualified in 18 months, I'll be going back full time as I will earn more than OH. We've agreed to see how shifts will work etc and OH can work part time:D doesnt bother me - we're equal but he has been very supportive of me and my going back to uni. Once I'm back at work we'll be able to look at getting a mortgage as well

can I ask how people paid for childcare before tax credits and vouchers and stuff?