You are a fool if you have a joint bank account.

nickyhutch

I think there is something in what you say, although we do have a joint account. There's !!!! all in it though - it's a reward account to get the £5 a month just for transferring £1000. We have accounts each, but just because we did when we got together and haven't altered them. We both have complete access to all our accounts but in reality I manage all our money, just because it's easier for one person to do it. OH would be stuffed if I snuffed it or bu99ered off.

margaretclare

Oh thanks. I am a fool then, as is DH.

Some years ago I suspect he would have agreed with you. However, one day I came home from CAB where I'd just seen a harrowing example of what can happen if there isn't a joint account in place. A lady had been widowed - the generation in which it was common for the man to take care of anything while she was given housekeeping money. The man's estate was going through probate and in the meantime, she had only her state pension i.e. 60% of what he'd got, and final demands from all the utilities were dropping through her letter-box. She'd never paid a bill in her married life, had no idea about insurances, any of the financial basics. She was distraught, as if widowhood isn't bad enough in itself.

I persuaded DH to open a joint account purely and simply for normal household bills: council tax, utilities, insurances etc. We've had this in place for some years now. As an older couple, it is worth its weight in gold to us to know that everything gets paid on the first of the month and this applies even if one of us was in hospital, if we're on holiday, and will still apply when one of us departs this mortal coil. We each get paid pensions into our own separate accounts and we both tip into the joint account.

giantmutantbroccoli

That is very valuable advice. Also, never get naked in front of your partner with the lights on, they could have hidden cameras around the room and be running a pay-per-view live webcam without your knowledge. The only solution is to be fully clothed at all times. Make sure you wear extra clothes under your clothes in case they hide the webcam in your topmost layer. If you don't, you've only got yourself to blame so don't come crying to the forums becaue we'll be all, like "LOL, we told you so!!" and you'll be all like "But my partner turned out to be a sleazebag, help me MSE!" and we'll be all "LOL, no, it's your own stupid fault for not wearing clothes!" and you'll be all "I hate you all!" and we'll be all "Whatever" and you'll pretend not to care but we'll all know you're crying on the inside.

clearingout

I have to say, troll or no troll, I am largely in agreement. I resisted mixing my finances with my now ex husband until we had children. He walked out on me, froze our joint account without telling me leaving it almost £2k in overdraft. I am not suggesting I had no idea about it, because I did, but it left me in a mess sorting out bills etc. when I was already in a terrible emotional state. I would suggest that own bank accounts are esssential but there is nothing wrong with joint accounts if you are in a trusting enough relationship, you don't use it for savings (unless two signatures are required for withdrawl purposes) and keep it out of overdraft.

tomatoe_2

margaretclare wrote: »

She'd never paid a bill in her married life, had no idea about insurances, any of the financial basics. She was distraught, as if widowhood isn't bad enough in itself.

Oh dear, she is exactly what I meant by laziness, ignorance or financial naievety

Back in the old days things were very different and a couple had very rigid defined roles. In modern day Britain its all changed and its common to have 2 or 3 serious long term relationships over the course of a lifetime rather than the safer long marriage which you may well be in. Thats 2 or 3 chances for an ex to cause mayhem if you have an account in joint names.

With so much financial advice available on the net such as this site, money matters are not shrouded in mystery anymore so its up to everyone to arm themselves with knowledge prior to a nasty break up.

I have AA cover for my car, I doubt it will break down, it hasn't since I've owned it (4 yrs) but you can't live on hope alone.
One day it probably will. :rotfl:

Joseph_Bloggs_2

tomatoe wrote: »

What I have posted is correct and helpful to anyone about to begin life as part of a couple.

On the other hand, when ending life as a couple (ending life not a relationship) a joint account is a blessing for the survivor.

marywooyeah

I wouldn't say that people were "fools" for having a joint bank account but I have always been adamant that in my own relationships money should be kept separate as my last 2 boyfriends sponged off me a lot. My husband has a tendency to lose track of how much he has spent and what on so we have separate bank accounts - he can blow his own salary but he ain't having mine!

Mrs_P_Pincher

Troll or no, having had a joint account with a partner it turned out I could not trust, I would never have a joint account again, without having my own account as well.

That's what Mr P and I do - we have a joint account and pay in the same amount every month by standing order to pay bills, shopping and a bit extra, which is our joint savings.

Then we both have our own accounts, so I can buy books and CDs without him complaining and he can buy the stuff he wants.

Works for us and, if we were to fall out and things were getting nasty, the amount of the other's money that either of us can get at is strictly limited.

Mrs P P

*Louise*

It's my hubby who would be scuppered if we split.

He has let me loose with all the finances and our savings are all in 3 accounts in my name. There is an envelope with all acc no's / passwords etc in case anything happens to me. I quite like that he trusts me so much.....but then if we ever split I am just not the sort of person who would b*gger off with all the money. Isn't he lucky :rotfl::rotfl:

Saturnalia

I'm torn on this, I can see both sides. On the one hand I like the idea that marriage is a team and everything in it is earned, held and spent jointly. On the other, so many marriages break down, often bitterly, nowadays that stories of one partner being left not only heartbroken but near bankrupt too seem to be a daily occurence.

But not even at that extreme, different people have different spending and saving habits so maybe separate finances is the best tactic for your team, if you and your spouse work well together with everything but money matters, and separate accounts stops it becoming a problem between you... who is anyone else to judge?