Son going on 18-30s holiday. I'm terrified !!!

poet123

It is not surprising you are terrified given your history, and you are just being a normal mum. Ask him to text on arrival and at regular intervals (probably a pain for him, but knowing about your dad he should be mature enough to realise why) Then keep busy....

Make sure both he and you have copies of passport and insurance docs, and that he knows if he has any issues he can phone home regardless of cost. Then keep busy!!

meritaten

Thousands of 18 - 30s go on these holidays and return safely! hungover, sunburned and poorer! they are far more likely to get into trouble at home when going for a night out! OOPs - perhaps I shouldnt have said that??????????? but would you be as worried if he went on a night out at the local pub?

lessonlearned

I understand your fears, I felt exactly the same when mine first went abroad aged 18 with 9 mates.

Agree with the passport details etc, also try to get contact numbers where possible.

I gave my son two pieces of advice

1. Don't hunt in packs, 10 lads walking down a street together in a group can be very intimidating to other people. It can also be seen as provocative and confrontational. For street purposes keep the groups smaller, say 50 yards or so apart.

2. This is about sex so look away now if you are easily shocked. I knew my son was still virginal and I explained to him that if he so wanted then there would be loads of opportuntities for encounters where he was going (Benidorm). I told him that I wasn't going to preach or tell him how to run his sex life but asked him to think first.

My exact words were: "You don't have to be contemplating marriage with the girl or even believe yourself to be in love, however, there is nothing worse than waking up to a complete stranger thinking "How on earth did I get here" and not remembering a thing." It's not a nice way to conduct your love life. (Not to mention the safety aspect).

Obviously the same rule applies here in the UK, nightclubs etc but I just felt that given the type of holiday - boys, booze etc he could so easily have found himself in just that very situation.

Needless to say he came home safe and sound and didn't bother with any girls whilst he was there.:D

Chunky-monkey_4

poet123 wrote: »

It is not surprising you are terrified given your history, and you are just being a normal mum. Ask him to text on arrival and at regular intervals (probably a pain for him, but knowing about your dad he should be mature enough to realise why) Then keep busy....

Make sure both he and you have copies of passport and insurance docs, and that he knows if he has any issues he can phone home regardless of cost. Then keep busy!!

Thanks. He has promised to keep in touch once a day by text, I'm happy with that. I try not to make a big issue about the way I think and feel, it wouldn't be fair for him to carry that burden, worrying about what I may be thinking. He went through the same bad thing as I did and to be honest I think he has come through it a well grounded mature young man. However he knows I can be a little neurotic sometimes but bless him, never says anything.

Great advise on the copies of documents. I will do that for sure. Thanks again.

Chunky-monkey_4

meritaten wrote: »

Thousands of 18 - 30s go on these holidays and return safely! hungover, sunburned and poorer! they are far more likely to get into trouble at home when going for a night out! OOPs - perhaps I shouldnt have said that??????????? but would you be as worried if he went on a night out at the local pub?

Yeah I do worry even when he's out local. Bad I know !!!:eek:

notechno

Texting's great, but then you worry when you don't get one as promised!

I understand you completely .... my son's 13 and has been in Scotland with his grown-up sister and grandparents for 2 wks .... and I've still been worried sick! God only knows what I'll be like in another 5 yrs

pogofish

Well, I'm afraid that every guy and girl of my generation who went on Club 18-30s did all sorts of wild, self destructive, idiotic things that would utterly terrify their poor parents if they ever got to know about it, got into all sorts of scrapes and behaved like total slappers - As did the reps who were nominally "in charge" of them. Quite a few even went back to repeat the experience!

And every one of them loved it, learned from it and survived to a reasonably sensible and well-rounded adulthood.

So you are just going to have to bee a great parent by accepting that this is some kind of right of passage that will hopefully do him good in the long run!

LilacPixie

ack he will be fine. Where is he off too? My advice as a seasoned, aka old, 18-30/2wenteys participant is take it easy on the first night, avoid the shots as you enter the bar they are lethal and enjoy yourself safely

soccermom

Spendless wrote: »

Is that the teenage equivalent of letting your child go to the shops by themselves for the 1st time and you just happen to have driven there too cos you'd forgotten to tell them to get something? :whistle:

I'm guessing you did that

Chunky-monkey_4

pogofish wrote: »

Well, I'm afraid that every guy and girl of my generation who went on Club 18-30s did all sorts of wild, self destructive, idiotic things that would utterly terrify their poor parents if they ever got to know about it, got into all sorts of scrapes and behaved like total slappers - As did the reps who were nominally "in charge" of them. Quite a few even went back to repeat the experience!

And every one of them loved it, learned from it and survived to a reasonably sensible and well-rounded adulthood.

So you are just going to have to bee a great parent by accepting that this is some kind of right of passage that will hopefully do him good in the long run!

And I was one of them :eek: and totally agree with everything you say.