Nice people thread part 4 - sugar and spice and all things

michaels

Now culturally I completely understand where your DH is coming from. I have an instant dislike of anyone who thinks a certain job is below them. All jobs need doing and everyone who is doing their best in a job is of equal value in my opinion. I have worked cleaning toilets and labouring on building sites with a degree from Cambridge and in no way felt I was any better or worse than my colleagues. Similarly if I were unemployed I would not consider that I would not do a particular job just because it was 'beneath me'.

However if like LemonJ I was being abused for doing my job I would limit myself to treating the abuser professionally rather than trying to be as helpful as possible, especially if rather than being supported by senior management I was being undermined for political reasons.

lostinrates wrote: »

How much is enough?


DH recently had a similar comment from a trainee at work when ''asking'' trainee if they wanted the opportunity to do something pro bono. DH gave the trainee a list of jobs people do for less money that are more immeadiately of benefit to other people and gave the probono work to another trainee, before putting trainee one on the work they felt ''paid to do''. (which dh was also doing). Trainee had misunderstood what it means to be ''asked'' by someone they are appointed to, and the pro bono person was finished work by 6:30 pm and able to go..trainee had to work til dh called it a day...sometimes the caring choice is the right one!

lostinrates

tomterm8 wrote: »

Seems to me all three individuals were wrong. Your husband was in the wrong because he didn't understand his staff. People, including white people, come from all kinds of cultures. You can't assume that someone will know that "would you like to do X?" means "do X". It simply doesn't to me. My mother was a quaker, and I was brought up to believe people mean exactly what they say. (And I also get irritated if I'm asked if I want more food time after time, because "Yes" always means yes with me, and "No" always means no. ). If you want me to do X, just tell me to do X, and I may or may not do it (OK, I never said I was ideal corporate material).

The original trainee is also in the wrong because he didn't take all available opportunities to learn.

And the other trainee is in the wrong because he saw both his colleague and his boss working late into the night, and didn't volunteer to join them.

This is really interesting and TBh I would hands down agree with you if this was a first seat trainee, but it wasn't (it was a second seat). Also, I'd argue that ''getting cultural requirments quickly'' is an important skill. In the job, not just within the firm but also with client contact. There is no second cance with clients often: within the firm there is...and this was a first chance.


Its actually interesting how, even in a highly selective firm really dodgy recruitment choices happen.

editr: oh, and re the staying late because your colleagues are? None of them would ever leave, ever! as a trainee you work on what you are set, report back to the person you are doing the work for and say ''Anything else tonight?'' or ''What's next?'' or something. They don't always see each other working late anyway...they are usually in their offices (trainees sit with senior members of staff or partners, so might be working for someone else while in an office with an overseeing partner, or a partner doing something different within the dept.) They might be in the same offices depending on what the work is, but as often as not, they will be a lone in an office surrounded by some offices with people doing other things, and some dark empty ones. They are often not on the same side or floor of the building, and also often they are ''working with'' people in another office in another country! That lack of face to face contact is why I argue more of them could work from home once proven themselves trustworthy!

tomterm8

lostinrates wrote: »

This is really interesting and TBh I would hands down agree with you if this was a first seat trainee, but it wasn't (it was a second seat). Also, I'd argue that ''getting cultural requirments quickly'' is an important skill. In the job, not just within the firm but also with client contact. There is no second cance with clients often: within the firm there is...and this was a first chance.

Fair enough, I thought you were talking about a much more basic / junior trainee than that. I.e. someone who was very new to the company, right out of uni, working closely with your husband.

Would expect a trainee that senior to have more nouse than that.

lostinrates

tomterm8 wrote: »

Fair enough, I thought you were talking about a much more basic / junior trainee than that. I.e. someone who was very new to the company, right out of uni, working closely with your husband.

Would expect a trainee that senior to have more nouse than that.

Second seat...been there six months plus. Ofcourse between uni and the firm all trainees have a year of professional quals (sometimes two, with a conversion too) plus they do a vacation scheme usually where told that the environment isn't for everyone but if they want it then here's what to expect....

osme of them are very ''raw'' despite everything though, and I think its fair of you to point that out. They are amoung the best paid in the City and frankly, should expect to earn their wage. If it can be while doing something ''good'' its expected most of them will be pleased at the opportunity to give something back, because they ''get'' a chunk. for kids who are straight out of uni to be middle rate//old higher rate tax payers (I think, I'm not sure about that TBH) in first job is pretty amazing IMO.

lemonjelly

lostinrates wrote: »

you are being saintly.

To balance out the negative, we all think you are wonderful.

michaels wrote: »

I always just remember I am not paid enough to care...

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

The old Soviet saying, "As long as they pretend to pay me, I'll pretend to work".

Thanks to everyone for the kind words & thoughts.:)

You'll notice I didn't include you in that wheezy...;):D

lemonjelly

Wheezy wrote: »

Do we?

Tomorrow, Mrs Wheezy and I will be going to a preview of a new Mike Leigh play on South Bank.

This one : http://www.whatsonstage.com/news/theatre/london/E8831315564259/New+Mike+Leigh+Play+in+NT+Cottesloe+is+Titled+Grief.html


And many thanks to LydiaJ for ridding us of our dependency on Russian and Norwegian gas imports and making the link into the European leccy grid redundant. :T

I actually hovered over the thanks button for 10 minutes...

Nah, I luv ya really wheezy! Yorra good geezer.:D

How was the play?

lemonjelly

I have finally posted in the other place.
There's a fair bit in there, so I suspect you'll appreciate why I was being discreet.

I apologise profusely for the war & peace effort.:o

lostinrates

I'm so cold. We're popping out but I've been procrastinating as its so cold I want to stay in bed instead.

michaels

I know what you mean - out old boiler is still connected but I am concerned the flue might vent back in to the house so we are heating water using an immersion and have had to get an electric radiator out of the shed (which we possess from the extension at our old house) - so far one electric rad is enough to stop it getting too cold. 3 of us now have the cold.sore throat/fever thing

lostinrates wrote: »

I'm so cold. We're popping out but I've been procrastinating as its so cold I want to stay in bed instead.

lemonjelly

Where're you going lir?

I'll be harvesting my first proper non blossom end rotted tomatoes in the morning.

I hope tomorrow evening I am making tomato soup.

Carrots in tubs have done well. I am getting too scared to take them out the pots in case I find they're only 2" long or something...

Good beans harvest this year - been picking twice a week.

I definitely have very small peppers. I'll leave em in the greenhouse for now, but suspect they'll end up in the house for warmth...