My teenage son feels the need to lie about his xmas presents to his mate...

victory

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john.xs

just tell him to humour his mate and give your own some loads of you time on xmas day .all my kids have been lucky to get stuff over the years but the thing they treasure the most is the time spent with them playing games/colouring etc. on a positive note when he goes to his mates he will be able to have a go on his laptop and ipod. tell him theyll both be out of date by this time next year.oh and who in the right mind would want a manure shirt for their child!!!! he will be scared for life.

victory

h.........................................

Poppy9

This is a common problem. My DD has a friend who is always bragging about what she had for her birthday (posh mobile, Ipod, gold jewellery etc) and what she is having for Xmas. She also takes wads of money to school for lunch and is always trying to buy the girls ice-creams (£1 a time) because they say they only have enough money for lunch. The girls always refuse the ice-cream offer as they are fed up with her being flash. For Xmas she bought 10 of the girls a present and spent £5 on each gift. A lot of money for a 11 to be spending. My DD bought 5 girls a xmas gift from her own pocket money and spent on average £2 on each using Buy 2 get one free offers in Claire's.

My DD (who is an only child and we can afford to indulge if we wish) said she seems to be the only girl in school (she means her group of friends but hey we all exaggerate) who doesn't know what she is having for Xmas. Some are amazed that she hasn't asked for anything aside from the odd CD. To me though Xmas presents are about surprises, it's not really much fun if you know what you are having.

dealornodeal_3

victory wrote:

Hi all,
My son 13 has a friend same age, only child that is as far as we know is getting £500 laptop, £200 cash to spend in the sales, a Man United shirt signed by all the players, an i-pod plus more I guess.(I have spoken to his mum and yes it is true!)
My son said to me yesterday- 'mum, I feel like I should lie to my friend about my presents because I know I will not get all that he gets, he will be showing off and telling me over and over what he has got and I think if you let me I should lie to him to shut him up'
I have said to him that he can if he wants 'big up' his presents but not necessarily lie about what he got.
On the one hand I feel desperately sorry for my son as he knows he will not get near as much tomorrow as his mate and does not want to loose face etc but on the other hand I know deep in my heart I have done the best that I possibly can so whatever his mate gets is by the by.
So, let him lie or not?!!!

This is sad! Christmas is a time for giving presents. In my day it was the thought that counted, and now in some families parents are giving their kids £1k of goods, ie a laptop etc! Will the parents be more thought of? Answer no. The child will grow up, if not already bullying people wanting more and more.

How to answer the question to your son is " be grateful for what youve got"

dolly_day_dream

My 3 children had relatively inexpensive christmas presents because that was all the budget would allow. I am not sure if they ever lied about what they got but I don't think so cos fast forward a few years and they invite their friends to share our Christmas - our house is certainly less than perfect. I am no Anthea Turner but it is filled with love and laughter and no amount of money can buy that.

Got to go cos I have got to
Clear the lounge
Make up the spare bed
Wrap the presents
Make the final presents for the treasure hunt
Print off the clue for the treasure hunt
Wrap the treasure hunt - will lay it out tonight while they are out on the town.
Prepare the dinner for tomorrow - am part roasting the potatoes today
Make the vegetarian option
Make deserts
Sausage rolls
Mince pies
Dusting
Hoovering
Deliver local cards
hang the cards I have already received
etc etc

Have a very merry everyone cos I don't think I am going to make it back on here till about 2am tomorrow:D

pandas66

More money than sence some parents!

victory, I'd be proud of your lad knowing he gets too much and he has a Mum he talks to......

My boys are fortunate too this year, but I'm more fortunate to know its appreciated.

somethingaboutshopping

I think its important to remember that presents are just for one day! Important as Christmas is, and nice as it is to celebrate the Christmas Story by giving gifts just as the shepherds and wise men did, your son obviously has a Christmas every day in that he talks to you very openly about his friends and his life outside home........ I can tell you that you can't wrap up a good parental relationship and open it one day a year! Indeed the fact that he can talk to you about something money related without worrying that your initial reaction will be to run out and spend lots just to spoil him like his friend also shows that he trusts in you to do the right thing and give him correct advice.

Don't get me wrong, even i would love an Ipod, signed football shirt bla bla bla, really who wouldn't, but when its to excess then I think its perhaps a little sinister...... why does this kids parent feel they need to do all this? Also, on top of all his bragging etc, if this boy still comes to your house to play with your son, then its clearly the home environment that you have created that makes an impact, not all the things that are there to be played with.

You obviously rock, and your Christmas will be amazing. xxx

WELSH-DRAGON_2

I remember my friends boasting about their presents etc and on one particular Christmas day at the age of 14 when I opened a box containing a greenhouse from my parents worrying how uncool my friends would think my present was.

But looking back the greenhouse has lasted alot longer than my so called friends and has provided hours of enjoyment.

Now with a large family of my own, 4 children under 12, they appreciate the value of items. DD2 has now been waiting 10 months for a Nintendo DS and even today she would love one but is not expecting Father Christmas to automatically give her one.

Welshy x

alanobrien

victory wrote:

Hi all,
My son 13 has a friend same age, only child that is as far as we know is getting £500 laptop, £200 cash to spend in the sales, a Man United shirt signed by all the players, an i-pod plus more I guess.(I have spoken to his mum and yes it is true!)
My son said to me yesterday- 'mum, I feel like I should lie to my friend about my presents because I know I will not get all that he gets, he will be showing off and telling me over and over what he has got and I think if you let me I should lie to him to shut him up'
I have said to him that he can if he wants 'big up' his presents but not necessarily lie about what he got.
On the one hand I feel desperately sorry for my son as he knows he will not get near as much tomorrow as his mate and does not want to loose face etc but on the other hand I know deep in my heart I have done the best that I possibly can so whatever his mate gets is by the by.
So, let him lie or not?!!!

Sounds like he gets a lot of love and parental care which is something he will come to realise and value in the years ahead.

Not a nice thought but It could be his mate is not so lucky and his parents are buying him stuff rather than paying him attention.