Stormybay's Thread a bit of comfort in a hard world

minniemum_2

I haven't posted on here for a while but just wanted to say that I am thinking about you all at this difficult time of year. My firsts are all over now as it has been just over a year since my Husband and Mum died but I'm still finding things difficult. My daughters have all been brilliant and I did have a wonderful event in October, my eldest daughter and her husband had a baby girl, my first grandchild. There were of course a few tears that my husband Mark couldn't have been here to see her but I know he would have been really proud. We are all trying really hard to make Christmas a happy time but its just not the same now.

lil_me

Been a while since I have popped in, seems many are doing the same. Just wanted you all to know I was thinking of you all x

Stormybay

Hi All, thanks for all the kind thoughts, Cornish Lady, I'm thinking of you this Christmas, please take all the above thoughts with you, if there is anything I can do, please Shout. I think I will be on here quite a lot in the coming week.

xxxx

elantan

i'm so glad this thread has reappeared my thoughts are with you all this xmas

cornish_lady

Thank you Stormybay, I am hoping to take my laptop with me, but I am travelling by train so could be a bit tricky.

The closer it gets the more nervous I am getting, as I don't want to be a wet blanket and spoil their christmas.

As for New Year, I have always found that an emotional time anyway, so may just go to bed and ignore it!!

I was sent a message today by a distant cousin in Australia which makes a lot of sense if only I have the strength to do it.

"Have a Christmas with many memories of other ones before it but make some new special memories to get you through the Christmases of the future"

(Land_of)_Maz

cornish_lady wrote: »

"Have a Christmas with many memories of other ones before it but make some new special memories to get you through the Christmases of the future"

What a lovely sentiment.



I have read thru this this thread and wanted to send some hugs and thoughts to you all, if that's okay. We lost my dad in November last year and somehow this year seems worse than last, i think because Xmas was so close to his death, it passed in a blur for us all.

Best wishes and kind thoughts to everyone who is thinking of their losses at this time.

Maz
x

AnW'sMum

cornish_lady wrote: »

The closer it gets the more nervous I am getting, as I don't want to be a wet blanket and spoil their christmas.

You won't spoil their Christmas, you all being together whatever you decide to do will make it a good time (or as good as can be expected at present). The thing to remember is that there are no right or wrong ways of doing things and everyone copes in a different way. I have a friend who's Dad died the other year and he and the rest of the family decided to do something totally different. They packed a picnic up including champagne and went to Chatsworth house where they went for a walk and then laid the picnic out in the middle of he park and had a toast to his Dad. They had a great if emotional time and made a new memory to treasure.

Don't get hung up with what you think you should do, do what you want to do when you want to do it. It could be that you open presents on Christmas Eve or Boxing day instead.

cornish_lady

Have finally received the bereavement payment (£2000 towards funeral) but I think that is it, as the letter just says:

"We will pay Bereavement benefits into the account shown below from 04/12/2007 to 04/12/2007"

It wasn't paid on 04/12/2007 it only went in late yesterday (I checked the account at lunchtime and it wasn't there then) but it was this morning.

I wish they would explain these decisions and how they came to them!!

Never mind, I should be grateful I am getting that, I know not everyone does.

Had a rash of people being "too nice" today so they were rewarded with a flood but never mind, they will know better next time.:rolleyes:

nursemolly

hi, i don`t know if any of you remember me but i lost my partner in february this year after a very traumatic illness, and this thread and everyone who comes here was an absolute godsend
well, i am just wishing everyone who helped and supported me through a very difficult time a very merry christmas and hopefully we can all look forward to a much happier 2008.
things are still painful at times, but it does begin to lessen. but i will never ever forget him.
many thanks and big (((hugs))) to you all.
lots of love
molly
xxxxxxx

Lucy1982_2

We will be marking the 2nd anniversary of my Uncles death in Jan.

While my uncle was in hospital one of his daughters was suffering from breast cancer and told him that she couldn't loose him now that she needed him to help her through this. My Uncle looked at her and told her not to worry that he would see in the next year and make sure she was ok.

He kept his promise saw in 2006 and died peacefully on the 2nd Jan. He also kept his promise to my cousin who went into remission in Feb 2006. No matter how sad it is I truely believe that the people we love stay with us.

We had 2 family deaths that year and I still can't believe my Aunt died, but as I said to her grand daugther at the time, you do NOT just get over it, you will learn to live with it and remember the good times.

Sending you all big hugs at this time of year x