MSE News: Single mothers 'worst hit by cuts'

Oldernotwiser

gillypkk wrote: »

wow she sounds like a right charmer!!!!



the whole short term pain - long term gain is what im trying to focus on right now but even NMW jobs are hard to come by. the point of working is to make a better life for your family not make it worse. you are in effect palming off your children onto someone else to raise instead of doing your first and formost job of raising your kids yourself so you really ought to be able to say at the end of the day "this is why you work kids so that once a month we can go out for the day and do something special as a family and maybe if we save hard next year we can go away for a little holiday" rather than "sorry kids i cant afford to do something special with you coz your childminder costs way too much and if we go out i cant afford to buy food next week"

Surely children need to know that people work to put food on the table and a roof over the family's head rather than to pay for extras? Treats are good but paying for essentials is more important.

gillypkk

FBaby wrote: »

So why did you move somewhere where there is supposedly no childcare available at all?

It has nothing to do with being fortunate or priviledge. I was in the same position once, had to decide whether to work my bum off and believe me, I had many nights crying my eyes out from exhaustion and frustration at not being able to enjoy any of my money because all of it just went to pay the bills, but I made that choice and now it has paid off.

I am not judging on who you are or your history, I am judging on what you are writing, about how you can't work because there is no childcare where you are and you can't relocate because you can't afford it. I don't consider these good reasons for not working. If your past is such that indeed there are issues making it impossible for you to work, then I might see the situation differently. I have total sympathy for those with disabled children who trully can't find childcare, benefits are there for a very good reason and I would never support this to be scrapped, but I don't believe that benefits are justified just because of lack of childcare in one area or lack of funds to move somewhere where there is.

because i was running away from an abusive husband back to my family if you must know!!!!!!

my parents lend me one of their cars so that i can expand my search area but when a job does come up i cannot secure childcare in the time frame and i cannot afford to pay for the childcare to keep the space open for my youngest child (eldest starts school this year which will make it easier)

i keep being told by the job centre to stop looking for work as it will be so much easier once both my kids are in school but im not happy to wait that long. i want to work. i need to work.

nomoreboomandbust

gadgetmind wrote: »

How on earth would I know? I have no idea which of my employees are/aren't married and which do/don't have children. Some tell me in the general course of chit-chat, some don't. I certainly don't ask as it's none of my business.

I'll leap on *anyone* with excessive "sick" days per annum regardless. Most people I employ are in the 0-2 days per annum bracket. Anything above 5 attracts attention. Anything in double digits, unless it's a one-off serious illness, and it's time for a serious chat about their future as they're clearly not coming into work with a spring in their step (or indeed at all!) and maybe it's best for everyone if they move on. And yes, I do extend these standards to myself.

The levels of absenteeism in the public sector disgust me. How can an employee do this? How can their manager allow it?

Because they can bloody well get away with it that's why :mad: Their manager is probably taking even more sickies than them, its very endemic, noone bats an eyelid, don't most of these people have an "allowance" of 10 days per annum to take as sickness.

For someone who is an employer, you seem a tad naive or maybe you are too busy to read the anti public sector rants in other threads

Marisco

TBH, I don't think it's worth moving, and all the expense it entails, if all you will get is a NMW job. If it's a reasonably well paid "career" job, with a chance of advancement, then yes, it would be a good idea to move.

FBaby

Marisco wrote: »

TBH, I don't think it's worth moving, and all the expense it entails, if all you will get is a NMW job. If it's a reasonably well paid "career" job, with a chance of advancement, then yes, it would be a good idea to move.

So that means that those who might possibly get a career and progress should do everything to try to get a job and get off benefits, but for those who will only get NMW, it's ok to remain on benefits for the rest of their lives because they will always be better off not working...

Most people working started once upon a time on NMW job, let it be after high school, college, university, having brought up children, or looking after a poorly parent. Yes, you are probably in a better position to go up the ladder the better the education, but it is certainly not a guarantee, and it is not because you haven't that you haven't a chance. My colleague, who's got the same job than I and earns the same didn't even go to college. My partner who earns a bit more than me also didn't. Both got where they are through cheer dedication and hard work. Unless you are unfortunate to be thick, you do have as much a chance as most to better themselves and earn enough to not only pay your way, but maybe even enjoy a few luxuries.

FBaby

gillypkk wrote: »

because i was running away from an abusive husband back to my family if you must know!!!!!!

my parents lend me one of their cars so that i can expand my search area but when a job does come up i cannot secure childcare in the time frame and i cannot afford to pay for the childcare to keep the space open for my youngest child (eldest starts school this year which will make it easier)

i keep being told by the job centre to stop looking for work as it will be so much easier once both my kids are in school but im not happy to wait that long. i want to work. i need to work.

So you went through a tough time and needed support then, and that's what benefits are for, but it's now been 2 years.... You know that once you are offered a job, you will need to put a deposit towards childcare, have you started saving for this? Have you already approached some childcare providers in the towns where you might be able to get a job to see where they have availability and whether they could take your children at short notice?

Maybe you really looking and have just had bad luck, or maybe you are not really trying hard enough, who knows. Maybe what you consider hard enough isn't what I would consider hard enough. I do totally believe you though when you say that the job centre is doing nothing to encourage you working before your children are at school as I have heard that from friends, and I think this is really worrying. It is much easier to get an employer to be flexible and provide hours that suit around childcare to their current employees who are showing dedication to the job than to someone new who hasn't had the chance to show how committed they are. Also, the longer you are out of a job, the harder it is to get one, and employers don't really care for the reason, all they care about is skills, knowledge and dedication.

gillypkk

FBaby wrote: »

So you went through a tough time and needed support then, and that's what benefits are for, but it's now been 2 years.... You know that once you are offered a job, you will need to put a deposit towards childcare, have you started saving for this? Have you already approached some childcare providers in the towns where you might be able to get a job to see where they have availability and whether they could take your children at short notice?

Maybe you really looking and have just had bad luck, or maybe you are not really trying hard enough, who knows. Maybe what you consider hard enough isn't what I would consider hard enough. I do totally believe you though when you say that the job centre is doing nothing to encourage you working before your children are at school as I have heard that from friends, and I think this is really worrying. It is much easier to get an employer to be flexible and provide hours that suit around childcare to their current employees who are showing dedication to the job than to someone new who hasn't had the chance to show how committed they are. Also, the longer you are out of a job, the harder it is to get one, and employers don't really care for the reason, all they care about is skills, knowledge and dedication.

yes i have several options for childcare lined up. i will have to use more than one childcare provider each day though if i have to go to further out as the nursery and childminders wont be open when i have to leave and will be closed when i return at night. i am trying to save but being soley on benefits leaves little to no money left each week espeically with my youngest childs food allergies which means his food is about twice as expensive as "normal" food and i also have to try to teach the nursery nurses what he can and cant eat and help them source the food they will need to give him. alot of childcarers wont touch him coz of his allergies.

FBaby

Good luck then, if you genuinely want to work, you will get there. It might not feel like it's not worth it to start with, but it does open avenues to opportunities and one day, it does pay off.