How would you react?

matt9b

oh dear lol! Nice to know I'm not the only one with weird friends.. What a weird situation to be thrown into. Your friend was obviously trying to help but sounds like they need a brain-scan.

dehaani

Deleted_User wrote: »

Please can you imagine this scenario and tell me how you would feel.

Its mid morning and you, partner and kids are home, a friend is also visiting with her children.

What was the purpose of the friends visit?

puddy

but the point is, it isnt weird when its in the context of how these friends normally are. if you treat someone and are treated as one of the family and your business is their business, then things like this get blurred so she wouldnt see it as odd

i get the hump when one of my friends likes to see whats in the fridge and then says 'oh you know im nosey'

JimmyTheWig

Very, very odd behaviour.

I can think of three possible explanations...

1. Your friend has different social boundaries to most people

2. There was a confusion in communication between the friend and your husband where she thought he had asked her to do it. E.g.
Friend: What shall I do with this?
Husband: Put it on the table in the kitchen.
But, you know how sometimes people say a completely different word to what they mean. Maybe he was reading a newspaper article about calendars at the time. And it came out as
Husband: Put it on the calendar in the kitchen.

3. Your friend is a strong believer in vaccinations and doesn't believe that you are. Therefore she wanted to make sure that it is on your calendar so that you can't say you forgot, etc.


If it wasn't quite so unusual I'd go for 1, but as it is my money's on 3.

Spendless

It's not the friend from the other week is it? The one that didn't want her child playing with a certain toy at your house and wanted your kids to eat at a different time cos it was more convenient for her?

Primrose

No, that's unacceptable. I think you should bite the bullet and either tell, or write to your friend and tell her that while you're sure she may have been trying to be helpful, her action was exceeding the boundaries of your domestic privacy, and you hope that it won't happen again. Opening other peoples' mail is actually illegal. Would she have done it if it has clearly been a bank statement for example?

[Deleted User]

I don't think she would have opened a bank statement, well i'd like to think so, i think she opened it as it blatently said immuniations across the front and id like to think it because she was being helpful.

Spendless, no its not the same friend - although your making me sound like i keep wierd friends now!!!! Lol.:)

Dehaani - not that is matters but the point of the visit was for the kids to play and for us to have a cuppa and catch up.

dehaani

Deleted_User wrote: »

Dehaani - not that is matters but the point of the visit was for the kids to play and for us to have a cuppa and catch up.

Catch up with what? It matters if you said something like come round to my house and you can catch up with my mail.

Assuming that wasn't the arrangement; what were you catching up on?

make_me_wise

To be completely honest I would have asked what she was writing on my calendar at the time. When (if) she advised what she had done I would have asked her why she felt it was okay to open post not addressed to her in my home, read the contents of a private letter and then write the details down on a calendar without saying a word. Does the daft bint think she is your new PA or something?

I wouldn't have raised my voice or said it in a catty way. Would just have made it very obvious that she was out of order and that her behaviour was not acceptable in my home. What would she have done, argued that it was okay?!!!!

Its really odd behaviour and not something I would feel comfy with. Anything could have been in that letter about any one of you. Its not her business.

As you didn't approach her about it at the time, due obviously to confusion over her having permission, I would phone her and say 'Just noticed what you wrote on my calendar about xxxx jabs appointment. Why did you open our post and read it and make a note of it without saying a word to me. That behaviour in my home is not okay' Then go quiet and let her explain herself. No matter what she responds with, calmly say that you do not wish her to do it again and that your post is private. If she doesn't like it thats her problem isn't it.

I wouldn't spare her feelings too much she seems to have no problem with walking all over yours and doing as she pleases. Bizarre.

[Deleted User]

Dehaani, i'm only responding to inform you i'm blocking you, i'm not the first and won't be the last. Surely you have something better to be doing that stirring that spoon.