Private Schools

clw1

Like Blue Monkey I was going to suggest that you also look round both local state and local private schools as maybe a different state school + tutor might be the best option.

Also have you also thought about where your son might do A levels ? If you do go private and all his friends are staying to do A levels can you afford for him to do 6 years ??

Good luck making the decision.

Gloomendoom

VJsmum wrote: »

WOW - lots of differing opinions and food for thought - thanks all.

Well, i am taking him along to meet a private tutor tonight - much to his disgust ("it's like admitting i'm thick" - not a phrase we have ever said about him or to him) but i've said we are going to try it for a few weeks.

My nephew has private tutoring. He wants to be a doctor.

Private tutoring isn't just for thicko's.

CH27

clw1 wrote: »

Like Blue Monkey I was going to suggest that you also look round both local state and local private schools as maybe a different state school + tutor might be the best option.

Also have you also thought about where your son might do A levels ? If you do go private and all his friends are staying to do A levels can you afford for him to do 6 years ??

Good luck making the decision.

Very good point.

LEJC

Ive not read the whole thread so appologies if I am repeating what others may have said...

First of all my son is in private education and yes it is a sacrafice ..but one we feel has been worthwhile..

Lots of schools will insist on an entrance exam but a lot of schools dont just take the best...they do take a spectrum of children...at the school my son attends there are four sets of children to a year group..so yes there are high achievers in the top set but there are also children who are lower academically...so dont let entrance exams put you off...typically our top set has 25 pupils and there are between 20-25 in set 2 and 3 and 20 in set 4 ...so the less ablility sets have the best teaching ratios

The one thing I would however slightly dissagree with is just putting your son there in a year by year basis...whilst its not easy to to predict what money you will have over the next 5 years for his education I really feel that its xsomething you should enter into for the whole time rather than hopefully one or two years...that way he will get the most out of the school....

If your son has a talent there may be small scholarships to cover this..although those incentives are good they dont usually reduce the fees by much more than 20%...you may also find that some offer financial bursuries..which can be very wothwhile ...so dont dismiss a private education without looking and questioning all the options..

Best of luck with your decision

lostinrates

clw1 wrote: »

Also have you also thought about where your son might do A levels ? If you do go private and all his friends are staying to do A levels can you afford for him to do 6 years ??

personally, I think this is less ''important''. At my school about half left. Lots of new students came, both from state, other indis or from overseas. I left after some indecision. Its a good natural break point and prep for uni, I'm glad I left then: for me it was a good decision.

Increasingly with universities having quotas from state v independent sector making the decision to re-enter the state system at 16 isn't a bad, nor an unpopular idea I think.

VJsmum

blue_monkey wrote: »

I think that whatever you do your son is going to get the the feeling that you are moving him because you are disappointed in him - his comment today proved that.

We have made it quite clear that we aren't disappointed, we are proud of him cos he finds it harder but still does his best.

Sorry. I think that you should explain that you just want the best for him and what does HE want.

We have

He is still very young, he might just not be very academic and no amount of money is going to change that, you just have to focus on the hings he can do that are good.

We know and we do, we are just trying to help make things less stressful for him.

Listen to him though and ask him about the schools before you go, his opinion is the most important. He already must think you are disappointed in him and that is not going to help him at all.

We wll but don't even want to mention it to him before we know that it is a possibility for him. I don't believe he thinks we are disappointed in him, but i will bear it in mind, thanks

I would suggest that you tell him that you want to try and help him move up a class/set so that he does not have to be in class with the disruptive kids, that he will never get the chance to learn if he does not get out of that class.

Did that this afternoon

If HE wants to do it, then he will, however YOU might have to accept that he is not as clever as you want him to be.

I keep stressing that it isn't about making him into something he isn't - i know there are other things in life to learn, it is about giving him more choices later. I realise many won't believe me but we are not pushy parents - in fact made a decision not to send our daughter to grammar school (with her complete agreement) because none of us felt it was the right environmnent for her, even tho she could have easily managed the work ("we are the best, we only take the best we only produce the best - blah blah blah, oxbridge, blah blah blah" - no thanks)

While you are going to find this hard, he is going to find it even harder if you constantly remind him of your disappointment.

I repeat, I am not disappointed, I want to make his life easier with something he is currently finding traumatic.

It seems to me that you do want to send him because you have already made the appointments,

Nope, i am exploring options.

but remember, if he does not want it he will rebel against it (I used to live around a big private school and the kids there were some of the worst behaved in the area in regards to drinking and being caught with drugs - maybe they just have more money to buy it).

I am sure that is true in some cases, but the same could be said of any school - he currently walks past the smoking kids on his way to school and my daughter often talks about 15 year olds coming in with hangovers and one who is pregnant.:eek:

Thanks again for all the comments (I am starting to sound like a broken record:D)

FWIW - he went to the tutor today and quite liked the way the maths was approached, so we shall see.

jcr16

i don't think there is anything wrong in thinking about the future education onf your children and seeing if there is anythign better out there.

Were currently considering changing the childrens school. not becuase there current school isn't great. it is , it is fantastic. but the next step up school's were just not impressed with. But we have found an amazing school where they are be there form a young age and stay there until they leave at 18 or 19.Everything about the school gives us everything we want from a school to give our childrne the best education possible. the one problem, getting into it is very very hard.

but like any parent you do want the best for your children. and my children are happy at the mo, my dd loves her circle of friends, they even invent games like winx club ( fairies of somesort,lol) but long term educationally you want them to have the best and be pushed to bring out the best, but you also want them to have happiness. trying to make sure you have the right balance is hard.

i'm sure hun tho you will make the right choices . xx

LEJC

As the parent of a child in private education we have yet to been quoted anywhere near £3k for a school trip...as suggested by blue monkey!

VJsmum

LEJC wrote: »

As the parent of a child in private education we have yet to been quoted anywhere near £3k for a school trip...as suggested by blue monkey!

Actually our state school runs a trip to China which is around £1400 and will end up nearing £2000 by the time you have paid for everything. My last word (cos I can't keep saying thanks! ) is that we have now decided to investigate a couple of state schools just outside our area (our area is undergoing a massive shake up of schools whereby all the sixth forms are going to one big sixth form centre - as a result there are going to be massive staff culls at all the high schools so we want to look elsewhere) - you never know there might just be an opening there. Keeping options open.

happy35

i havent read the whole thread but i considered private schools for my son, but my final decision was to send my son to his local state school

I made the decision as my son wanted to go to school with his friends and it is a very good school, he is intelligent and is an A grade student but he is not particularly interested in school if you know what I mean he just picks things up easily.

A few friends sent their children to private school as they thought they would do better but to be honest I still thought their grades hadnt particularly improved, they were happy though although I would have classed it as a waste of money

my preferred choice for my son would be to remain in a school with his friends supplemented with a private tutor as nothing in my opinion will compare wiht one to one tuition