Looking for support and advice not judgement here

vax2002

To be honest, a lot of other people are falling down these same cracks, most folk with exception of those employed by the Government, teachers, Nurses ect are very lucky if they can get to the end of the month and put food down on the table, the days where you worked and had money left are well and truly over.
Its time to give up the illusion of working works, settle the notion that all you are ever going to have is a sore back and debts, downsize everything and cut back all luxury, buy and old banger car, rent a cheap house and join the rest of us sat in the smelly stuff.

Gulliver2011

debtinfo wrote: »

ok No1 thing here, your not going to like it, but you should not be paying back your friends and family, they are creditors like all the other creditors in the bankruptcy and so can not be paid back. It also seems that this seems to be alot of the reason that you are having trouble paying for your every day outgoings.

£160 per week for car rental, is that a typo, is it really per week not per month, whos name is that in

Wish it was a typo - due to never having any money to buy a car we seem to be trapped into paying a rental for a car and it works out at £132 a week although I calculated this on a *52 / 12 way therefore works out at 157 a week - which is just nuts. But we need a car to take step son to and from school.

The one I am most worried about is the friend loan that now has taken it upon himself to ring work and send distressing text messages.

NeverAgain_2

You are being wiped out each month by your rent, which is way, way too high for your income.

As a rule of thumb, a quarter of your monthly income spent on rent gives you more than a fighting chance of meeting the other regular expenses.

In your case, aim for about £500 a month.

That may not be easy to achieve, but you do say you are moving, so you have the opportunity to at least look closely at it.

debtinfo

Gulliver2011 wrote: »

Wish it was a typo - due to never having any money to buy a car we seem to be trapped into paying a rental for a car and it works out at £132 a week although I calculated this on a *52 / 12 way therefore works out at 157 a week - which is just nuts. But we need a car to take step son to and from school.

The one I am most worried about is the friend loan that now has taken it upon himself to ring work and send distressing text messages.

Was it taken out prior to bankruptcy, If so he has no right to do so and is breaking the law, your employer has no right to pay him directly and is breaking the law simple as that

Gulliver2011

debtinfo wrote: »

Was it taken out prior to bankruptcy, If so he has no right to do so and is breaking the law, your employer has no right to pay him directly and is breaking the law simple as that

Yes it was a good few months before the bankrupcy but how do I stop him turning nasty and harassing me at work for this.

debtinfo

you tell him the debt is included in the bankruptcy and that if he harasses you, you will report him to the authorities, You also need to tell your OR about any debts to family and friends and stop paying all of them, everyone has to be treated equally, then the law is on your side

immoral_angeluk

Without wishing to sound harsh there are three things which immediately spring out.

You are living well beyond your means.
You are not prioritising your payments.
You wife needs to find a job.

You rent and utilities MUST be your first priority bills after food etc. As others have said you are not allowed to pay any creditors including friends/family that you owed on the date of the bankruptcy.
You car costs are shockingly high, could you clarify why your rent a car and don't just buy a cheap runaround? You would be better off leasing at the very least. You really need to sit down and review your expenses and lifestyle. You simply can't maintain your current circumstances so this needs to change.
Did I also read right that your £1600 debt is being taken in WHOLE out of your next month's wages??
Without being too abrupt, if your wife is fit and able she needs to find a job, as do any other members of the household who are old enough and able.

Ineedaname

Groceries seem very high. Allowance for two adults and a part time child (50% of the time living with you) would probably be nearer £400 per month.

That, and lower rent should bring you within manageable amounts.

Gulliver2011

immoral_angeluk wrote: »

Without wishing to sound harsh there are three things which immediately spring out.

You are living well beyond your means.
You are not prioritising your payments.
You wife needs to find a job.

You rent and utilities MUST be your first priority bills after food etc. As others have said you are not allowed to pay any creditors including friends/family that you owed on the date of the bankruptcy.
You car costs are shockingly high, could you clarify why your rent a car and don't just buy a cheap runaround? You would be better off leasing at the very least. You really need to sit down and review your expenses and lifestyle. You simply can't maintain your current circumstances so this needs to change.
Did I also read right that your £1600 debt is being taken in WHOLE out of your next month's wages??
Without being too abrupt, if your wife is fit and able she needs to find a job, as do any other members of the household who are old enough and able.

Its only because I paniced when he rang work on Firday that I said I would see if we could do this. Without stating the obvious I know it has to change which is why I have posted on here. With my financial situation I cannot see a way I could lease a car and the worry with a 'banger' is that if I pay say £300 for a car it will just break down and give me reliability problems - this all just sounds like excuses I know.

Also my wife used to be a middle manager bringing in £25k but has not been able to find a replacement job as yet - if she did I would also need to restructure my hours if possible or go self employed to cover child care resposibilities.

inspirespirit

You have 4 major issues. Your rent. Your car, your grocery bill and your wife's nil contribution.

If you are thinking of moving, try to move closer to your own work/sons school.
Grocery bill. There are 2 and a half of you (taking into account stepson is only there half the week). Make sure you take packed lunches to work and do the Sainsburys feed a family of four for fifty quid. As there are less of you, you should be able to get your grocery bill down to 50 pounds per week.

Your wife isn't bringing any money into the home. If she cannot find work she should be claimining JSA. If she cannot work because of illness or disability there are other benefits she could claim. She should be bringing something in.