Looking for support and advice not judgement here

Gulliver2011

Hi

I have come to a real low point with money and can't live like this anymore. I am 39 (later this month) and since my first pay check and my (well off sister) saying just use your check book at the end of the month as by the time your check clears your money will be in I have had a shocking (and that is putting it mildly) apporach to money.

I am at the stage where I got paid last 12 days ago £1400 and without paying any utility bills and rent and only some car payments I now have hardly any money for the month. I am married with one step son and all our money seems to go on travel expenses and food. Can't see where else it goes.

I have always had the ability to generate extra money through either doing freelance work (am a web developer) or by doing overtime at work which has always got me out of the sh*t.

The bottom line is I am now bankrupt - was made bankrupt back in February - have lost every friend / family member that I have ever had and at the last count 4 houses.

And we have been served notice on this new one and now need to find somewhere else to rent.

It makes me feel sick to my stomach that I live like this and it HAS TO CHANGE. But I need practical help.

I tell people lies all the time about money - ie yes the payment has been done and that it must have got lost in the system. Am not proud of this I have also told worse lies that that but will not go into those here.

My wife currently does not work or get benefits of any kind.

To cap it all I have a first class honours degress in Business Studies - majoring in accoutancy. !!!!!!.

Well enough rambling can anyone help?

G

McKneff

May I suggest that you post up a statement of affairs. Then we can help you with your outgoings and incomings.

I dont know the circumstances of the loss of your family/friend but if it was just and only because you were made bankrupt, then
my friend they were not as good a friend as you thought and so not worth another thought.

Hopefully, no one is going to judge you, Im certainly not, and if anyone does, just ignore them,

How old is your step child, can your wife find work. I know, easier said than done these days.

And stop worrying, youve come to the best place for practical help, and I can almost guarantee you that you will feel better by nightfall, there are some brilliant people on here who can help you.

NeverAgain_2

Gulliver,

As well as doing a statement of affairs, could you answer a couple of queries?

You say you were bankrupt in February, which means no more creditors or repayments direct to them.

Most people find that after setting their budget with the official receiver, they can at least live, if not lavishly.

So I'm a bit confused as to why you are still in quite so much bother.

If I've misread your post, just put me straight, we'll get nowhere standing on too much ceremony.

Gulliver2011

Hi Thanks to you both for this and I am so glad that I posted.

The bottom line is we don't and have never budgeted and we have spent the last couple of moths paying money back to some friends that we have borrowed from in the past.

My Stepson is 12 and we have him Wed Thur Fri and every ohter weekend (pretty much). We live 30 miles from his school and so on these days my wife has a 60 mile round drive to collect him plus taking him to football practice on a Thrusday another 60 miles. I work over an hours train ride from home and some days get up at 5 to ride to the station and then get back at 8:30.

Our outgoings are currently

900 for Rent
120 for Council Tax
150 for Light and Heat
40 for 2 mobile phones
25 for broadband (need this for my freelance work and on pay as you go dongles)
200 for my travel to and from work
Car Rental 160 per week (nuts I know)
Food and Petrol housekeeping etc £200 per week.
250 loan to work (borrowed some money from them) this has now been paid back and i will get £1600 + overtime this month so probably about £2k + any freelance work - I mean who cant live on this.

Also I have borrowed 1600 from someone else at the turn of the year lied about when he was going to get it back he has now phoned my work and so I have had to promise that he will get it back out of my next wages paid directly from work - AGGGGGGGGGGhhh sorry felt like one of those moments.

The banrupcy people have agreed to all this but the bottom line is a - never stick to any of it and b dont earn enough to cover it

Gulliver2011

Although this is what I should be paying rent and utility bills are hardly ever paid at all - this can't go on.

Gulliver2011

And with the family and friends thing they are all well within their rights to no longer talk to me for the things that I have done to them.

McKneff

Gulliver2011 wrote: »

Hi Thanks to you both for this and I am so glad that I posted.

The bottom line is we don't and have never budgeted and we have spent the last couple of moths paying money back to some friends that we have borrowed from in the past.

My Stepson is 12 and we have him Wed Thur Fri and every ohter weekend (pretty much). We live 30 miles from his school and so on these days my wife has a 60 mile round drive to collect him plus taking him to football practice on a Thrusday another 60 miles. I work over an hours train ride from home and some days get up at 5 to ride to the station and then get back at 8:30.

Our outgoings are currently

900 for Rent
120 for Council Tax
150 for Light and Heat WAY OVER THE TOP - SHOP AROUND ANC CUT DOW
40 for 2 mobile phones
25 for broadband (need this for my freelance work and on pay as you go dongles)
200 for my travel to and from work
Car Rental 160 per week (nuts I know) LOOK AT PUBLIC TRANSPORT - TAKING BOTH AMOUNTS INTO ACCOUN
Food and Petrol housekeeping etc £200 per week. £800 A MONTH, THIS COULD BE MORE THAN HALVED IF YOUR OH ISNT WORKING, SHE HAS TIME TO MEAL PLANT
250 loan to work (borrowed some money from them) this has now been paid back and i will get £1600 + overtime this month so probably about £2k + any freelance work - I mean who cant live on this.

Also I have borrowed 1600 from someone else at the turn of the year lied about when he was going to get it back he has now phoned my work and so I have had to promise that he will get it back out of my next wages paid directly from work - CAN YOU DO THIS WHEN YOURE BANKRUPT, AGGGGGGGGGGhhh sorry felt like one of those moments.

The banrupcy people have agreed to all this but the bottom line is a - never stick to any of it and b dont earn enough to cover it

Just a couple of notes but you need to do a proper SOA if someone could post a link please.

Gulliver2011

Sorry being really thick - not sure what one of those is even

NeverAgain_2

http://www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalc.html

I think this is the one which has the 'format for MSE' option.


Edit: It is - the option is mentioned in the help section:

http://www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalchelp.html

debtinfo

ok No1 thing here, your not going to like it, but you should not be paying back your friends and family, they are creditors like all the other creditors in the bankruptcy and so can not be paid back. It also seems that this seems to be alot of the reason that you are having trouble paying for your every day outgoings.

£160 per week for car rental, is that a typo, is it really per week not per month, whos name is that in

Gulliver2011

Hope this is right

Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet

Household Information
Number of adults in household........... 2
Number of children in household......... 1
Number of cars owned.................... 0

Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 1650
Partners monthly income after tax....... 0
Benefits................................ 0
Other income............................ 500
Total monthly income.................... 2150

Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 0
Secured/HP loan repayments.............. 0
Rent.................................... 900
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 125
Electricity............................. 30
Gas..................................... 0
Oil..................................... 125
Water rates............................. 30
Telephone (land line)................... 0
Mobile phone............................ 40
TV Licence.............................. 15
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 0
Internet Services....................... 0
Groceries etc. ......................... 600
Clothing................................ 20
Petrol/diesel........................... 250
Road tax................................ 572
Car Insurance........................... 0
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 0
Car parking............................. 0
Other travel............................ 200
Childcare/nursery....................... 0
Other child related expenses............ 60
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 0
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 0
Buildings insurance..................... 0
Contents insurance...................... 0
Life assurance ......................... 0
Other insurance......................... 0
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 0
Haircuts................................ 10
Entertainment........................... 0
Holiday................................. 0
Emergency fund.......................... 0
Total monthly expenses.................. 2977


Assets
Cash.................................... 200
House value (Gross)..................... 0
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 0
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 200

No Secured nor Hire Purchase Debts

Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Friend Loan....................1600......0.........0
Friend Loan....................5400......0.........0
Friend Loan....................350.......0.........0
Rental Arrears.................3000......0.........0
Total unsecured debts..........10350.....0.........-


Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 2,150
Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 2,977
Available for debt repayments........... -827
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 0
Amount short for making debt repayments. -827

Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 200
Total HP & Secured debt................. -0
Total Unsecured debt.................... -10,350
Net Assets.............................. -10,150