What would you do? Pay or not pay ...

peardrops_2

JodyBPM wrote: »

On the face of it, from what you had previously posted in the thread, it seemed to me that the only decent thing for a parent to do would be to ring the other parent to apologise and discuss a repair/ replacement - and I stand by that.
QUOTE]

I don't think they deserve an apology from me. I only found out a week or so later and once I had found out their elder son had made my son's life a misery for several days. I had lost any compassion for them. If the elder son had kept his beak out then I would have handled it alot more differently.

I still stand by my views that they do NOT deserve an apology - my son's "crime" in being a part of an accidental breakage is far less than their son's crime of bullying, harrassment and intimidation.

JodyBPM

peardrops wrote: »

JodyBPM wrote: »

On the face of it, from what you had previously posted in the thread, it seemed to me that the only decent thing for a parent to do would be to ring the other parent to apologise and discuss a repair/ replacement - and I stand by that.
QUOTE]

I don't think they deserve an apology from me. I only found out a week or so later and once I had found out their elder son had made my son's life a misery for several days. I had lost any compassion for them. If the elder son had kept his beak out then I would have handled it alot more differently.

I still stand by my views that they do NOT deserve an apology - my son's "crime" in being a part of an accidental breakage is far less than their son's crime of bullying, harrassment and intimidation.

Sorry, I meant from what you had previously written before that post.

Actually even after the bullying, I would have probably gritted my teeth and rung up on pretence of an apology, but more just to get the air cleared and the bullying stopped rather than out of goodwill. In my experience, most people are actually fairly reasonable if you talk directly too them, much more so than if situations drag on...

peardrops_2

Me and you Jody are completely different characters then LOL! I couldn't grit my teeth and apologise to them - never in a month of Sundays not after seeing my boy break his heart.

balletshoes

peardrops wrote: »

Me and you Jody are completely different characters then LOL!
I couldn't grit my teeth and apologise to them - never in a month of Sundays not after seeing my boy break his heart.

so if you don't reply, or volunteer the £25 they've requested towards the cost of their son's new glasses, do you think this (and the attention the older boy is paying your son) will all go away? I'm not having a go, if you don't think you should pay, thats fair enough, just interested in if you think this will just all blow over if you don't acknowledge it at all. I guess I'm concerned that your son will get more attention from the brothers as he got the letter home, and they'll know that.

GlasweJen

£55.10 as a balance is the NHS voucher as this can't be claimed by the optician until the glasses have been collected (£55.10 matches a kid with either a pretty high prescription or a big astigmatism). The parents in question here are expecting the OP to pay more than their contribution to their kids glasses as effectively they will only ever pay the £40 out of their own pocket.

gizmo111

Haven't read all 5 pages so prob been covered before but why is school accepting invoices and getting involved in parents finances?

RedBern

peardrops wrote: »

The owner of the glasses laughed the incident off and stated that it "doesn't really matter as they are only NHS freebies anyway" also witnessed by others. They then returned to lessons and the owner of the glasses explained he couldn't do his work because his glasses had broken and could he go to the office to ask them to contact his parents.

He then went to the office and they contacted his parents - whether that was to ask for a spare set or just to tell them I don't know.

Now 3 months later I get a bill for a pair of designer glasses with a snotty note. When I spoke to the school today about it, they were surprised that it had taken them so long to get the student another pair as he has been without glasses for weeks now.

hmm - difficult one for you. I have a son who has worn glasses since he was 2 or 3 years old, and have always paid the cost of repair of replacement when necessary. As previous posters have said, they are his responsibility (like the time he left them in the toilet block in a French campsite and we drove 4 hours before he (and we:o) realised he didn't have them on. He was without them for 1 week before we drove back there on the way home - lesson learned though - he didn't do that again (although he did do other silly things!).

I think I'd go back to the school and say you're surprised to have had the invoice for the glasses after so long, you thought this matter had ended when you discussed the bullying previously, and you're sorry but won't be contributing to the replacement after all this time.

Good luck

euronorris

Sazzarella wrote: »

I've got stigmatisms, doesn't seem to matter where I go they are always this expensive unfortunately!

I'm not even that old, my last pair of NHS specs was about 8 years ago but that's great if they have improved since then. Not sure why people feel the need to get defensive about it!!

Er...so do I and it has never affected the cost of my glasses.

The only thing it affects is contact lenses (can't ever get 'perfect' sight with contacts and have to wear a specific type).

I'm confused as to why it cost you more?

itzmee

euronorris wrote: »

Er...so do I and it has never affected the cost of my glasses.

The only thing it affects is contact lenses (can't ever get 'perfect' sight with contacts and have to wear a specific type).

I'm confused as to why it cost you more?

I didn't even know that my son had a stigmatism until until he got contact lenses and his glasses have never cost me a penny.

puddy

balletshoes wrote: »

so if you don't reply, or volunteer the £25 they've requested towards the cost of their son's new glasses, do you think this (and the attention the older boy is paying your son) will all go away? I'm not having a go, if you don't think you should pay, thats fair enough, just interested in if you think this will just all blow over if you don't acknowledge it at all. I guess I'm concerned that your son will get more attention from the brothers as he got the letter home, and they'll know that.

but that sort of mentality is akin to 'money with menaces' ie if she dont pay up, her son gets it

thats not the way to stop bullying, its to have the school enforce discipline on any attempts by the older boy to attack OPs son