Eldery Neighbour keeps knocking on our door - help please.

rozmister

jess1974 wrote: »

Don't answer the door without checking who it is first, i do this so i don't have to put up with annoying salesmen, if it is the old lady just pretend your not in.....

Because that's definitely the neighbourly way to deal with a probably confused harmless old lady?! Geez.

Someone who is disorientated and struggling to understand reality due to a health problem/old age is VERY different to a salesman pestering you so they get their comission. It makes me genuinely sad to see somebody compare the two & suggest behaving like that and it makes me despair for what local communities will be like when I have a family and then grow old.

With regards to the old woman I would try and flag down the younger lady if you see her alone or exiting the house and speak to her like suggested. She will probably knows this old lady wanders anyway but knowing she comes round means they might be able to stop her doing it.

themull1

If it kept happening to me, i would put a lock on my gate at night and don't answer the door, she might get bored and stop doing it. Or put a sign on your door saying 'Audrey doesn't live here'

meritaten

some of the responses on here make me despair of people. Would you be so uncaring if it was YOUR mum wandering around in a confused state? Or, God Forbid, in a few years it could even be YOU!
To suggest ignoring this person, locking the gate, or putting a sign up saying Audrey doesnt live here are all selfish uncaring things to do. At least the OP has shown that she does care but doesnt know how to help. I hope she ignores these horrible posters and does the neighbourly thing and Help this poor old lady.

brians_daughter

If you know where she lives please call ss and let them know of your concerns.

My Gran was like this - i saw her every single day but even i was not aware fo how 'bad' she really was. She was well known locally and luckily people often helped.

One night she went out (November 6th) and locked herself out. Unfortunately no one saw, or cared enough to escort her home and she died in hospital of phnumonia (sp) brought about by hyperthermia as she'd been locked out all night. we believe,as do the medics that it was her memory loss/confusion that caused this.

Its 1 call, and even if its all you ever do at least you know you alerted the 'right' people. Best case is theres nothing seriously wrong with her and ss have made a visit that didnt need making, worst case..well, i think you just heard it.

jackyann

I'd just like to add - in case it isn't obvious - that there are a lot of types, and causes of, dementia. This means there can be "good days" & "bad days".
If you can spare the time, keep a notepad near the door (or make a note in your diary) of these episodes. So if SS / GP / CPN make an assessment on a "good day" you have other evidence, should it be needed.
Sometimes, some kinds of dementia include hallucinations (eg: seeing "Audrey" or hearing "Jill")
I am glad she is knocking on the door of someone caring (although I'm sure you wish otherwise!)

olibrofiz

Poor you, but poor lady. I think if it were me I'd do as meritaten suggested and have some shoes handy by the door to escort her home. I'd also put a padlock on my gate.

The lady a few doors down from my mum had alzheimers and her husband used to have to lock all the doors in the house cos she'd just wander off. Sometimes she'd still manage to get out and I'd be driving by and see her standing on the side of the road waving at the traffic. I used to stop and walk her home.

My mum's getting a bit dodgy with her memory, I'd like to think that someone would help her if I wasn't there at the time.