not knowing which way to turn

johnnyboyrebel

Bennifred wrote: »

I honestly think he wil be better off telling the police - I don't think he's got anything to lose now they think he's a pushover. Horrible to live your life in fear. It is actually a lesson in doing the right thing, standing up to bullies, etc.

I totally disagree but I did already say earlier this would be the general opinion so I guess it is entirely down to you and your son. Im sorry to hear about the shoe thing, its just disgusting.

julie03

my son has just told me they forced him to backwash a beer and they also made him put a tablet thing from a urinal in his mouth
he is really not in a good frame of mind at the minute, he is struggling with his a levels and he has just had a bad break up from a year long relationship and he hates everything about humanity

i really hate the [STRIKE]people[/STRIKE] thugs that did this to my child,:mad::mad::mad::mad::mad:

marmitepotato

Your son is going to hate this....but you need to call the Police.

DebtHater

julie03 wrote: »

my son has just told me they forced him to backwash a beer and they also made him put a tablet thing from a urinal in his mouth
he is really not in a good frame of mind at the minute, he is struggling with his a levels and he has just had a bad break up from a year long relationship and he hates everything about humanity

i really hate the [STRIKE]people[/STRIKE] thugs that did this to my child,:mad::mad::mad::mad::mad:

I do however think that this isnt just the thugs, why havent you been more proactive in encouraging him to deal with these people? When I was brought up I was taught to defend myself, even if it meant getting arrested myself. My dad always told me I would never get punished if I got in trouble for genuinely defending myself. Why hasn't your lad stuck up for himself? Licking peoples shoes, putting urinal cakes in his mouth..... if he doesnt learn to stick up for himself now, his life is going to get a whole lot worse.

Yes, the police should deal with it but I feel that maybe if your lad was to give the ring leader a good kicking, there wouldnt be an issue.

julie03

we have always told him never hit first but always defend yourself, i cant believe he did these things either, and we have told him today that he should never let himself be degraded in this way unless they have a knife or gun and he feels his life is in real danger.
the police came today and we have decided not to take it any further but apparently these kids are well known to them
he feels horrible about himself now and its easy to say defend yourself but he has never faced this kind of situation before, he has learnt a hard lesson.

Bennifred

Oh the poor boy! I'm not surprised he is feeling awful (you,too). I think the one good thing about this is that he felt able to tell you the details of what actually happened. I'd be inclined to encourage him to take up some form of self-defence training to help with his self-esteem. In the meantime,at least is the short term, it might be wise to either ensure he never has to be alone when he is out - collect/deliver if he isn't with friends the whole part of any journey - or make detailed plans on how he should handle any situations that may arise.

Good luck.

Taiko

Speak up, it's for the best, even if it seems difficult.

yvonne13_2

Julie03 I am sorry you and your family are going through this and now the nasty thugs have started on your son they could see him as an easy target. I do not abdicate the usage of violence but if this ever happened to my child my views would change very quickly.

Perhaps sending him to kick boxing from an early age would have given him the confidence to deal with the matter. Thank god it wasn't filmed as I have noticed alot of that rubbish recently.

starrystarry

I know this must be a really difficult position to be in Julie, but please try to make him understand why it's so important he names these people to the police. I hate to mention the Sophie Lancaster case but I couldn't help being reminded about it when I read your post. Please give the police a chance to do something about it.

*gem*

I have been in this situation with my 13 yr old son when some local travellers gave him a good beating and took his phone off him. We involved the police and named names. Surprisingly, we haven't had any comebacks from it at all. You should call the police and deal with it that way. Those youths need to learn that what they did is wrong and that won't happen if you let it go!