Nearly 30, in debt, lost and nervous! I need to change.

Lost_and_nervous

girlatplay wrote: »

Hey Lost! How are things? Hope you and DD are well.

Gap x

Hi Gap,

hope you and little miss are good. DD is doing well thank you, as for me thats to follow. xx

Lost_and_nervous

I havent been on for a few days purely because I have been productive. Ok not really in the area which I have wanted to focus on however I have enjoyed myself in the garden. We got some nice-ish weather and I was so fed up of how the garden was looking, so I cracked on out there and me and DD have enjoyed being in the fresh air and getting all muddy. As a result of this I will be looking into growing my own vegetables and fruit but I know it will be hard work so at the moment I am just going to research. It was good for me too as I am now feeling much more motivated and have used the quiet time when DD was having her naps to think about what I actually want out of life and what I need to achieve. Things that I have known yet I start doing something then loose interest, get lost and nervous or just dont find the motivation. Something I have been so bad for in the past and I really really really cant carry on for DD's sake.

This is why I am now opening post, doing jobs everyday, instead of doing a 'To Do list' I do a 'Done' list. I tell myself positive things and I am trying not to worry too much about things to the point where I get myself into a stew.

I received a letter from the loan company and they have agreed to reduce my monthly payments. But they nhave not told me to what about, I told them I could afford £40 so they have adjusted the interest, I presume to that amount. Fingers crossed.

I have also heard from 1 credit card and they have agreed a lower amount, £1.56 over the amount I offered (£10) but I am happy to find that amount.

Still waiting on the other 2, One has said that they have passed it to a debt collectors and told me one name but I have received letters from 3 different debt collectors so I think I will pay them the offered amount and report them to the financial ombudsman.

I need to be very honest, I have 3 payday loans which I took out a couple of months ago and I cant pay them. I have seeked advice from others on here but I am very scared and worried about them. I cant pay them back and deffering them is costing me more. I know I have been silly and I will learn from my mistakes. What have I done?

On positive note, I have found so many things to ebay its getting ridiculous, it will take me ages to list, but I as I am tidying I am taking photos, writing quick description then putting them away to ffree up some room. Then I will sit down with a glass of wine one evening and have a good old list.

Avon - I am going to try again! But not to house, its too difficult for me, I dont like it. So will take in to work and do it that way.

I have got a little silly though where saving energy is concerned, I dont turn lights on until I can bearly see around the house, I am trying not to use the hot water continuously and and turn everything off as soon as I can.

OH is still himself but has been more helpful. Fingers crossed it continues.

I am going to really get my beauty business out there, I have been far too lazy and far too nervous which is silly. I need to make it a success.

You have all been so good to stick with me and being so caring. Thank you all. xx

girlatplay

Oh wow lost! That all sounds great :T I'm glad you are opening post right away. That is something I find to be good now. Even if I don't like it I can deal with it right away and that is it over rather than ignoring it and it gets worse.

Re: the payday loans, you will have had some good advice from the people on here who know what they are talking about. I can't stop you from being scared about them but I can tell you this will be over one day and you can look back at the lesson learned with a view to never going back there. You will eventually pat yourself on the back for finding the strength to pull through it all.

I don't turn lights on until I can barely see either. Not because I want to energy save but by the time it gets dark I am on the couch in front of the tv and too lazy to move!

Yes, take Avon to work. See if some of your colleagues can take the books home and get their friends and family to order stuff.

Get your beauty business up and running. Start small and work up, it will be easier if you do that. Get yourself out there, I love the confident Lost that we have just seen in your last post! :j

Take care

Gap xxx

Eager_Elephant

Hi lost and nervous

I think to be able to deal with your payday loans like you are your other debts you are going to have to change your bank account otherwise if you don't pay to defer they will try to take the whole amount out and this could leave you short.
Cancelling your card will not work as they can still collect via a cancelled card. If it is more of a cheque one where they hold on to your cheques then you could contact your bank and say you have lost your cheque book and they will cancel the cheques.


The other alternative is if ebay sells well maybe you could pay one off every month until they are gone. (obviously if they are small enough)

If you do change bank accounts make sure it is with a bank that you have no connections with.

EE

Eager_Elephant

Sorry forgot to say - Well done for being positive - it really helps the mind set to see the positive in everything.

EE

ebayqueen_2

Hi Lost

Have been away on holiday and only catching up with posts today. You are certainly making progress, keep going:T

Sorry to hear you are feeling stressed re: payday loans. Just think that these will be the last you will ever take out. List as much stuff as you can and get some money in.

Thinking and praying for you

E:A

Lost_and_nervous

girlatplay wrote: »

Oh wow lost! That all sounds great :T I'm glad you are opening post right away. That is something I find to be good now. Even if I don't like it I can deal with it right away and that is it over rather than ignoring it and it gets worse.

Re: the payday loans, you will have had some good advice from the people on here who know what they are talking about. I can't stop you from being scared about them but I can tell you this will be over one day and you can look back at the lesson learned with a view to never going back there. You will eventually pat yourself on the back for finding the strength to pull through it all.

I don't turn lights on until I can barely see either. Not because I want to energy save but by the time it gets dark I am on the couch in front of the tv and too lazy to move!

Yes, take Avon to work. See if some of your colleagues can take the books home and get their friends and family to order stuff.

Get your beauty business up and running. Start small and work up, it will be easier if you do that. Get yourself out there, I love the confident Lost that we have just seen in your last post! :j

Take care

Gap xxx

Thank you , you were right it is better to deal with it. I have certainly learnt from it all and I thank everyone on here who is helping. It took courage to post and own up to this silly mistake. Thats so funny that you dont turn the lights on either, I know what you mean about once your on the sofa its hard to move! Thank you for seeing the confident Lost, I am really trying! Hope you and little miss are ok! xx

Lost_and_nervous

Eager_Elephant wrote: »

Hi lost and nervous

I think to be able to deal with your payday loans like you are your other debts you are going to have to change your bank account otherwise if you don't pay to defer they will try to take the whole amount out and this could leave you short.
Cancelling your card will not work as they can still collect via a cancelled card. If it is more of a cheque one where they hold on to your cheques then you could contact your bank and say you have lost your cheque book and they will cancel the cheques.


The other alternative is if ebay sells well maybe you could pay one off every month until they are gone. (obviously if they are small enough)

If you do change bank accounts make sure it is with a bank that you have no connections with.

EE

Thank you for your help, its great to hear from you. The payday loans are the online ones, I have been so stupid. One of them is 300 plus interest, 200 plus interest and then 500 plus interest :mad::eek::mad: silly silly me.

Thank you for being kind to me xx

Lost_and_nervous

Eager_Elephant wrote: »

Sorry forgot to say - Well done for being positive - it really helps the mind set to see the positive in everything.

EE

I am trying really trying! xx

Lost_and_nervous

ebayqueen wrote: »

Hi Lost

Have been away on holiday and only catching up with posts today. You are certainly making progress, keep going:T

Sorry to hear you are feeling stressed re: payday loans. Just think that these will be the last you will ever take out. List as much stuff as you can and get some money in.

Thinking and praying for you

E:A

Welcome home, hope you had a wonderful holiday. Thank you for seeing it, I dont always think I am making progress. I really get down in myself cause I cant see no difference.

They certainly are the last ones I will ever take out. I have found so much stuff to list. Its out of this world really.

Thank you for being so kind. xx