New here, at the end of my tether

chevalier

If your ex partner has run up bills but does not pay them, it may be that you can write to the creditors and tell them that he is no longer financially joined to you, and that they should pursue the debt with him, or may be half of the debt?

I am sure we can help a bit, as can payplan/cccs
best of luck
chev

joeblack066

Hi guys!
Ex partner ran up debts but are all in my name, so stuck with them. Am sitting going through all debts now, will post a SOA later. Wish me luck............
BTW, am keeping my spirits up by listening to Christmas songs, especially Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas, original version.........."Next year all our troubles will be miles away"...........feels like the anthem of my life over the years. TTFN Debs x:xmastree:

bluezone

Debs,

Well done for posting. My ex was just as good at creating debt in my name! All the people on here are fab for advice. Keep motivated and YOU WILL get through this and 'have yourself a very merry christmas'.

Bluezone x

SSB

Hi
What a difficult situation you are in, it is incredible that you still have some fight left in you. However, it might be good for you to find a Domestic Violence support group locally. This is not just a question of debt, is it? It is also you becoming more assertive and proactive. Your daughter is still rather young, which means that this situation can carry on for years to come. Although distressing, your daughter is old enough to know the difference between bad mouthing and truth.
Good luck to you, hope all goes well.

joeblack066

Just a bit more explanation;

I bought my house in Dec '04 with my best friend, 2 single Mums getting back on the housing ladder. 9 moths later, she wanted out, and the lender agreed to let me keep the property, which was ok cos my partner moved in . The rest I explained previously.
The anomoly is that when the mortgage was agreed, the lender messed the figures up, and gave us £123k when it should have been £144k. Instead of doing the whole offer again, they put £21k on an unsecured. This means that the rental income does cover the mortgage, just not the unsecured, which I have finally just realised!
This is my SOA, sorry its long but it's like my life..........complicated!
I keep reminding myself of the good stuff.........4 great kids (3 grown up and doing great!) new baby granddaughter, (10 days old!), and I have a roof over my head and food in the fridge!
Think that this is my REAL lightbulb moment, its been flickering on and off for ages!

Current

Water 21.40
Council Tax 100.00 (Current Year)
Rent 450.00
Gas & Elec 121.00
Sky 15.00
Mobile Contract 35.00
Food & Household 156.00
Fuel 100.00
Phone 15.00
Orange Internet 15.00
TV Licence 22.00
Car Tax 15.00
MOT 10.00
Car Ins 35.00
Breakfast Club 17.06 (to enable me to work)
Car HP 250.00
Mortgage (Inc unsec) 850.00
Clothes for daughter 10.00

Total 2237.46

Income Wages 1235.30
Rental Income 758.00

Total 1993.30

Deficit of £244.16 without debts being cleared.

If I take out the Unsecured to Lender and the Car HP it becomes

Total 1837.46

Leaving a monthly balance of £155.84

Debt

Water 107.26
Buchanan Clark & Wells 93.19 Final Bill Previous Address
Westcot Credit 769.79 Ex Partner’s Phone Bill
Council Tax 269.28 From a previous Address (arrangement made)
Council Tax 135.65 From another Previous Address
Severn Trent 139.50 From a previous address
Alliance and Leicester 939.25 Outstanding on an Unsecured Loan
NatWest 441.37 Overdraft caused by Ex partner
Powergen 1205.34 From previous address run up when ex partner walked from job)
Scotcall 133.90 Ebay A/c in my name caused by ex partner)
TBI 873.31 Unsecured Loan Outstanding debt
DG HSBC 1171.26 Unsecured Loan Outstanding debt
Unsecured Loan 21000.00 explained above
Mortage Payment 1700.00 (Inc Unsecured )

Total 28,979.10
Car (HP) 5680.00
Overall Total 34,659.00

Mortgage Amount £123,000

Absolute Total £157,659

Approximate Value of Property £155,000
Property only 6 months into a 10 year lease to a charity

mrslawrence2003

joeblack066 wrote:

Hi. I have been lurking awhile, which seems to be how everyone starts on here, but I am really feeling it now.

I am a single parent, but my 16 yr old has left school. and is working part time, and my 9 yr olds Child Tax Credit and Child Benefit gets claimed by her dad, even tho she spends more time with me. There were domestic violence issues so I can't/ daren't change things.

I earn enough to pay my normal bills, but have outstanding debts plus a car finance that I can't manage. I was doing fine for a while, even bought a house, but then my partner moved in, moved his family in, walked from his job and I spent 3 months supporting 10 people off one wage! I finally kicked him out when he lied about having a job to go to. I rented out my house (the mortgage was too high for me alone) moved to a smaller rented proerty, but I am saddled with debts from when I was supporting us all, debts HE ran up on a mobile (in my name) and this car finance that was supposed to be paid between us that of course I am now left with.

I also am still paying debts from my previous marriage (my 9 yr olds dad) as he doesn't work so its down to me and I seem to be getting deeper into a mess every day. I am not sleeping, I am worried all the time. I have been working 2 jobs (50-60 hrs a week) to get some cash together, but I have a health condition that is made worse by this so I have cut dwon again

I know I need to post an SOA, and I will as soon as I get time.

Am thinking about Pay Plan, just needing some initial advice I suppose.

Thanks in advance....Debs.

welcome debs - you have come to the right place for help, advice and support. sounds as if things have been pretty tough for you, but i can promise that they wont always be tough and things will get better.

first things first, please post your soa - so we can have a look and see if there's things you can cut back on.

secondly, have you thought about entering into a DMP or IVA (both would allow you to keep your house i think) or taking the step of going bankrupt?

there's a lot to consider, but pls don't let it overwhelm you. we are all here to help you and support you and guide you through the maze and help you with your first steps on the road to a debtfree life.

joeblack066

Have posted my SOA, would really appreciate your advice guys!

lynzpower

Ok Ive had a look and I cant see a great deal of cutbacks Im afriad.

Water 21.40
Council Tax 100.00 (Current Year) ( is this with single persons discount?)
Rent 450.00 ( for the house you live in? )
Gas & Elec 121.00 ( this is high. Looks at est.org.uk)
Sky 15.00 ( get rid of this and save the money)
Mobile Contract 35.00 ( down grade this, you should be able to get a contract for 15, or go PAYG)
Food & Household 156.00 ( slighlty high, you COULD get this down a bit)
Fuel 100.00 ( for the car?)
Phone 15.00 ( landline is thiS?)
Orange Internet 15.00 ( i thought organce internet was free with the orange contract?)
TV Licence 22.00 ( no its 11 a month)
Car Tax 15.00
MOT 10.00
Car Ins 35.00 ( is this the absolute cheapest, use quidco for cvash back on swapping)
Breakfast Club 17.06 (to enable me to work)
Car HP 250.00
Mortgage (Inc unsec) 850.00 ( how much of it is th eloan)
Clothes for daughter 10.00

Total 2237.46

Income Wages 1235.30
Rental Income 758.00

You are overspending currently at 244 a month. Work out with my savings how much you re still overspending if you take on board the cutbacks?

you simply must get the child allowance & family tax credits paid to you. Either that, or sell the flat. Could you sell it to the housing association??

Storm

Hi Debs,

I echo Lynzpower in that you need to get the CB & CTC coming to you - this is partly to pay for things like childcare, so would at least cover the breakfast club.

Have you been making any payments on these debts? The priority ones are the mortgage, council tax and utilities (though I'm guessing not the ensecured bit of the mortgage)

Although you're only 6 months into the lease with the housing association it may be worth at least talking to them - they may offer to buy it off you (saving estate agents fees). Talking to the CAB/PayPlan/CCCS is probably a good start too.

Is your ex paying any maintenance? It may be worth talking to the Child Support Agency too.

Good luck, Storm x

joeblack066

lynzpower wrote:

Ok Ive had a look and I cant see a great deal of cutbacks Im afriad.

Water 21.40
Council Tax 100.00 (Current Year) ( is this with single persons discount?)
This includes some arrears from this year
Rent 450.00 ( for the house you live in? ) Yes
Gas & Elec 121.00 ( this is high. Looks at est.org.uk) This included a bill
Sky 15.00 ( get rid of this and save the money) Am in a year contract
Mobile Contract 35.00 ( down grade this, you should be able to get a contract for 15, or go PAYG) Am in an 18 mth contract
Food & Household 156.00 ( slighlty high, you COULD get this down a bit) less than £36p/w for 3 of us including pack up?Fuel 100.00 ( for the car?) Yes
Phone 15.00 ( landline is thiS?) Yes
Orange Internet 15.00 ( i thought organce internet was free with the orange contract?) Am not contracted to orange for mobile
TV Licence 22.00 ( no its 11 a month) Is £22 per month for 1st 6 months
Car Tax 15.00
MOT 10.00
Car Ins 35.00 ( is this the absolute cheapest, use quidco for cvash back on swapping) Will swap when due but not due till Jan
Breakfast Club 17.06 (to enable me to work)
Car HP 250.00
Mortgage (Inc unsec) 850.00 ( how much of it is th eloan) £150
Clothes for daughter 10.00

Total 2237.46

Income Wages 1235.30
Rental Income 758.00

You are overspending currently at 244 a month. Work out with my savings how much you re still overspending if you take on board the cutbacks?

you simply must get the child allowance & family tax credits paid to you.

This is a huge emotional stumbling block for me, and one I feel I cannot do. There were domestic violence issues against me and my 3 sons, but never my daughter I must add. I have been away from him for nearly 5 years but only calmed things down 2 years ago. I know he would start again and it scares me too much.
Either that, or sell the flat. Could you sell it to the housing association??

Have wondered whether to at least approach them about that. I did wantto hang on to it if I could, but now I am not so sure. I suppose the next thing would be to get it valued?

Thanks for your help,

Debs.