First Time post on here - felt sick and a loser

beanielou

TTMCMschine wrote:

But if they go bankrupt & don't have the credit cards, then how will they be able to fund the lifestyle they feel they deserve while not actually paying for any of it themselves?

Martin has already put a note on this thread.
Please read it TTMCMschine.
Everybody, please be nice to all moneysavers.Thanks:T

plumduff-2

Blooming heck Fred... What a sorry story...

This is a man coping with his wifes ill health (cancer scare), two older children living with disabilities (the DLA is theirs not yours..).. two dependant younger children, debts and your own mental health... which is no doubt stressed to the limits..

Sometimes debt is more than the actual money owed, its the stress and anxiety it causes which is more of a downer - on top of this to have to stay strong for the family must be placing a huge burden on you...

As a debt adviser, I would be urging you to read up on bankruptcy (BR).. As you are on income support, this would cost you £325, and would write all the debts off... leaving you with one less issue to cope with..

Whilst the debts in total are relatively small in comarison with most who go BR, I feel this is an option you need to read up on due to the level of time and energy that is needed by you to deal with it.. surely this time and energy would be better used on caring for your family...

Whilst the posts on here about money saving are comendable, I feel with all the other issues Fred is dealing with, seeing whether lidl has chealer beans than Asda or whether he can make spag bol for 8 on 56p is really something he doesnt have the time and effort to do (soory for sounding flippant - MSE is brill for these tips - but im concerned for Freds mental health...) and if his mental health deteriorates, his family will be up the creek without a paddle..

So BR would help clear the debts off in full, whilst saving you having to scrimp and save as much as you are at the mo...

Please read through the info on these two sites, I really do feel they would provide much needed advice on the issue of BR... I know quite a bit about this myself... so if you needed to ask further questions, I would be happy to help, as far as I can..

http://www.nationaldebtline.co.uk/

http://www.insolvency.gov.uk/

scootw1

plumduff-2 wrote:

Blooming heck Fred... What a sorry story...

This is a man coping with his wifes ill health (cancer scare), two older children living with disabilities (the DLA is theirs not yours..).. two dependant younger children, debts and your own mental health... which is no doubt stressed to the limits..

Sometimes debt is more than the actual money owed, its the stress and anxiety it causes which is more of a downer - on top of this to have to stay strong for the family must be placing a huge burden on you...

As a debt adviser, I would be urging you to read up on bankruptcy (BR).. As you are on income support, this would cost you £325, and would write all the debts off... leaving you with one less issue to cope with..

Whilst the debts in total are relatively small in comarison with most who go BR, I feel this is an option you need to read up on due to the level of time and energy that is needed by you to deal with it.. surely this time and energy would be better used on caring for your family...

Whilst the posts on here about money saving are comendable, I feel with all the other issues Fred is dealing with, seeing whether lidl has chealer beans than Asda or whether he can make spag bol for 8 on 56p is really something he doesnt have the time and effort to do (soory for sounding flippant - MSE is brill for these tips - but im concerned for Freds mental health...) and if his mental health deteriorates, his family will be up the creek without a paddle..

So BR would help clear the debts off in full, whilst saving you having to scrimp and save as much as you are at the mo...

Please read through the info on these two sites, I really do feel they would provide much needed advice on the issue of BR... I know quite a bit about this myself... so if you needed to ask further questions, I would be happy to help, as far as I can..

http://www.nationaldebtline.co.uk/

http://www.insolvency.gov.uk/

Whilst you are right that bankruptcy will clear the debts I feel that the points being made here about "cooking spag bol" etc and finding ways of cutting back on expenditure are also very helpful to the OP and will help prevent the situation happening again.

plumduff-2

Definately... I have read and use the MSE posts myselfs and Im not in debt... As I said... I was merely making a point about Freds mental health, not having a pop at any of the regs or the hints and tips.. No intention to offend, you all do a wonderful job...

My worry is - if Freds mental health goes pear shaped, then who will his family have to lean on...? the two eldest children have disablities, the other two are young and his wife is ill... Fred seems to be trying to hold everything together and if he isnt paying these debts off monthly - due to going BR, then he may be able to live decently without having to make cutbacks as well..

barnaby-bear

plumduff-2 wrote:

Definately... I have read and use the MSE posts myselfs and Im not in debt... As I said... I was merely making a point about Freds mental health, not having a pop at any of the regs or the hints and tips.. No intention to offend, you all do a wonderful job...

My worry is - if Freds mental health goes pear shaped, then who will his family have to lean on...? the two eldest children have disablities, the other two are young and his wife is ill... Fred seems to be trying to hold everything together and if he isnt paying these debts off monthly - due to going BR, then he may be able to live decently without having to make cutbacks as well..

If he went bankrupt though he'd lose his credit rating and they overspend by £500+ a month *before* the debt payments and can't cut their expenditure to match income. I don't understand how bankrupcy will solve the fact that expenditure without debt servicing is still way higher than income. But given the various progress of this thread I can't think of a solution.

scootw1

barnaby-bear wrote:

If he went bankrupt though he'd lose his credit rating and they overspend by £500+ a month *before* the debt payments and can't cut their expenditure to match income. I don't understand how bankrupcy will solve the fact that expenditure without debt servicing is still way higher than income. But given the various progress of this thread I can't think of a solution.

There is only one way to do it and that is to reduce expenditure, which the OP has, admittedly, said he is trying to do, or increase income by selling stuff. It will take tough choices to get through this but they will be all the better for it afterwards.

poppy10_2

Why don't you have the dog put down? It would save on the continuing vet fees.

While you're at it, cancel the Sky (saving £70 per month) and get a freeview box for £25.

Despite repeated questioning, you have not stated
- Why you are paying council tax when you are in receipt of so many benefits
- What your huge "Household Expenses" of £900 per month is actually going on
- Which of your debts are credit cards and which are loans
- Whether you have looked in to changing phone/internet suppliers
- How you can afford to spend £200/week on pocket money and xmas/birthday presents, yet can't afford bus fare to see your dad in the hospice.

This forum is full of much nicer people than me, but you seem determined not to cooperate with them at all or do anything to help yourself out of your situation. It's no wonder that people like BOGOF_Babe get frustrated.

hypno06

I agree with Barnaby Bear, this is about two things:

1. Solving the problem regarding the debts.
2. Making sure the same problem doesn't happen again.

It is the same as for those who have consolidated only to spend again on the credit cards - unless and until we make changes to the way we view money and how we spend it, making less money go further etc, we will find ourselves back at square one with even less way out next time.

I think that people are doing their best to help here. Maybe there is no ideal solution, but everyone has some ability to make positive steps, even small ones.

Mental health is important and you will see very positive threads throughout this forum for support, urging counselling, talking here etc. We do care, but we also need to see that the person truly wants to make changes for themselves.

barnaby-bear

poppy10 wrote:

Why don't you have the dog put down? It would save on the continuing vet fees.

While you're at it, cancel the Sky (saving £70 per month) and get a freeview box for £25.

Despite repeated questioning, you have not stated
- Why you are paying council tax when you are in receipt of so many benefits

He's in a non-freeview area so can't get that HOWEVER he has the dish so can get FREESAT - he said he can't get that because his kids wouldn't like the range of channels.

He's put CTB as income and taken it off so council tax is a net 0.

barnaby-bear

poppy10 wrote:

Why don't you have the dog put down? It would save on the continuing vet fees.

He's been repeatedly told the Blue Cross and PDSA do free vet care for those on benefits. He has to pay because prefers the treatment options via a private vet - it's liek you have to pay for certain drugs not available on NHS.