First Time post on here - felt sick and a loser

Tustastic

How are you and yours, weymuff?

weymuffred

Tustastic wrote:

How are you and yours, weymuff?

To be brutally honest, not very good, fed up with life.

smokybabe

Fred, Hi there. If I remember correctly you have made some changes since your original SOA.
Why don't you post an updated version for the DFW's to have another look at for you? I know there are some things that you are reluctant to change but with all the hassle of the previous thread perhaps some useful suggestions have been missed. Please try not to be down Fred, you have come over as so strong up until now and besides your family needs you.
Re tax credits, my OH was poorly last year and off work for 12 months on IB. Our tax credits dropped from £195.00 pw to £76.00pw (no childcare element) and they decided we owed them £1,800.
They are absoloute heartless tw*ts IMHO - all our expenses stayed the same but as OH could not work they cut out the childcare even though he was in no state to look after them when I was working and so I had to go on to nights so as to try and keep our heads above water and look after the kids. Nightmare.

miggy

smokybabe wrote:

Why don't you post an updated version for the DFW's to have another look at for you?

I would second that - and include things like the difficulty getting past the outstanding utilities bills. Other people will have had the same - what did they do?
I have also seen other people say the CCCS haven't helped them. They went ahead and worked on their own solutions according to what works for them. There are also people around who found their debt went up before it went down, which sounds alarming but these things can take a while to turn round, so hang in there.
Have you approached the Dogs' Trust or PDSA for help with vets' bills?

msmicawber

Hi Fred,

I've just found this thread and have been trying to think of ideas to help you.

I think you mentioned at one point that CCCS didn't want to help and that you were considering bankruptcy. That may be the way for you to go, but it strikes me that unless you can reduce your outgoings you may not get the 'benefit' of going bankrupt and may end up in debt again afterwards. I heard someone on the radio from (I'm pretty sure) CCCS saying that IVAs aren't suitable for those whose income is completely derived from benefit, so that's why they maybe weren't able to help you. I think it's because there generally isn't sufficient disposable income to throw at your debts.

Some thoughts I had on your situation:

Housekeeping bill - as everyone, I think, has remarked, it's very high and you've been recommended to look at the Old Style board for tips, which is excellent. However, a lot of the savings come from savvy shopping and from cooking from scratch. I see that your wife has been gravely ill and that you suffer back problems, so cooking from scratch could be difficult for you. I wonder if your children could help there - chopping veg. and that sort of thing, which I know can be very difficult when you have back/mobility problems. They may well enjoy it, and it does no harm teaching young people to cook.

Clothes, etc. - again, you spend quite a lot. I wonder if you could marry your daughters' love of the internet with reducing your outgoing on clothes and shoes by getting them to sell their old clothes and buy as many as possible new on Ebay?

Another thought - have you sat down as a family and discussed the fact that things are tight at the moment? I would definitely recommend it. Most children want to help, and if they understand that things are difficult may well offer to help. Even if they're at the stroppy teenage stage, you can often use psychology, making them feel more adult by being included in discussions and having their ideas listened to.

I note that you can't do anything at the moment about your high gas/elec. bill because you're paying off a balance to the company. How much longer will you have to pay at the higher rate?

Phones/internet - I don't know if you've had a chance to look at Martin's articles about lowering the cost, but there's lots of good stuff on there. I'd recommend at least using access codes for calls. You can program these into your phone or leave a list by the phone and insist everyone uses them - I've found them a boon, especially with kids phoning their friends' mobiles.

I hope some of that is useful, and that things improve for you soon.

Bogof_Babe

Can't believe this thread is still going, and that your situation has not improved .

The entire population of this country are able to work things out so as to keep their heads above water, with the possible exceptions of people who ought to be getting maintenance for themselves or their offspring from a reluctant ex-partner, and even then there is the arguably efficient CSA.

Fred, I think the only answer that will satisfy you would be for someone to say "don't worry, here's how you can get your lifestyle all covered off on benefits".

Did you contact the PDSA re. the dog's operation?

I'm sorry but people who flatly refuse to help themselves do my head in.

miggy

Bogof_Babe wrote:

Can't believe this thread is still going, and that your situation has not improved ...........
I'm sorry but people who flatly refuse to help themselves do my head in.

Not sure this is fair... he has made some changes, is unable to make certain big savings (such as gas/electric) for reasons he's explained, and now he's been hit by a big unpredictable expense, which can happen to any of us.
Weymuffred, can you do a revised SOA please? I seem to remember you can't get Freeview because of your location but you were moving to a cheaper Sky package... have you been able to cut back on food/clothes at all? Perhaps a more detailed breakdown of these would reveal some changes you could make?
And I hope the dog's getting back to health again :-)

Also - anyone who wants to criticise the clothes spend - I don't know Weymuffred or the details of the medical circumstances affecting him and his family, but please bear in mind that some illnesses and disabilities do mean heavy wear and tear on clothes. I worked with disabled adults for some years and I've seen it.

pippo

Hi You'all,
You seem like such nice folks & I think I am having my LBM so is there any one out there who can guide me through it? I have been watching from the wings for a while and done some of the basic moves such as uswitch for power etc. and even bragged about it in a "cool, middle class way" as oh and neighbours would report.

You may guess from that that I have watched you all posting & replying for some time yet not had the nerve to admit that I am realy in debt & need to sort it out big style!!
:cool:

pippop

smokybabe

Hi pippo, welcome aboard. The best thing you can do is to start your own thread with an SOA (statement of affairs). If you have been lurking you will know that this is a list of all outgoings and incomings. :eek:
From there the good people on here can advise you how to cut back so as to help with the debts. They can also help with any other questions you have.
Good luck on your journey to being debt free. :beer:

Smoky. xxx

pippo

hi smokey & thanks

The state of affairs is the bit I have been working up to for a while -- OH had nervous breakdown & I looked to keep him going like he did for me as a student (many years ago) In Theory I can aford the cc repayments ... In practice it will take me until 2079!!
This sudden facing up to it is a bit disabilitating ( if there is sucha word) please bear withme & I will try to work out how to post my workings out tomorrow. Bl***y 'ell it feels be tter already

P
ippo