Trying for baby number 5??

madelaine

I think most people would rather buy than rent a property, because it is something you will eventualy own, and not be paying rent for the rest of your life, We have purchased a propery to rent out, to act as our pension.

Lolth

But there are those who aren't in big families who don't receive such 'help'.
My husband is from a small family...his family did nothing to help him!
The premise that kids from bigger families are set at a disadvantage is false.
Kids are disadvantaged by poor parenting. Even the poorest parent (money wise) can give their children a rich life.

pigpen

smk77 wrote: »

education...so you've said.

However, it's becoming increasingly difficult for first time buyers (did you read my link?) to get on the property ladder without assistance. We're living in a world where professionals such as teachers are unable to get onto the property ladder despite hard work and achievement.

no, I didn't read it.. it crashed my browser but I doubt it will say anything I've not seen 100 times previous.

madelaine wrote: »

I think most people would rather buy than rent a property, because it is something you will eventualy own, and not be paying rent for the rest of your life, We have purchased a propery to rent out, to act as our pension.

Then that is their right.. good on them.

Many are not eventually owned though.. they are a burdensome debt which becomes too much and the house is repossessed.. if they cannot afford to save for a home they cannot afford the mortgage in the first place and are living beyond their means.. by saving the deposit they show to themselves they can manage and can afford to pay for a house.

And yes you can rent and save a deposit.. I managed!.. 5 years ago so not that far in the distant past before anyone thinks I am 97

I wanted to buy a house big enough for my family and not rely on the council to provide my children with an adequately sized home... that was my incentive to save every penny I possibly could.. and in less than a year I saved £13,000 .. which was slightly over half our income.

eta.. Actually... all that aside... I paid over £500 for my daughters prom.. unlike her 'well off' friends who had £50 ebay dresses or weren't allowed to go at all... Many parents of large families feel they have to over compensate in areas like this (I didn't feel that I felt my daughter worked hard at her exams and deserved this) to counter the stereotypes that children from large families are disadvantaged.

pigpen

Lolth wrote: »

But there are those who aren't in big families who don't receive such 'help'.
My husband is from a small family...his family did nothing to help him!
The premise that kids from bigger families are set at a disadvantage is false.
Kids are disadvantaged by poor parenting. Even the poorest parent (money wise) can give their children a rich life.

There is more to life than money!!!

Money makes the road smoother but it doesn't make it happier.. more often than not it makes is less happy.

smk77

pigpen wrote: »

You will have to agree to disagree with me on this one. And just because I do disagree with you does not give the right to decide my perfectly adequate views are nonsense. You are as entitled to your opinion as I mine and I respect yours so please have the same courtesy

You suggested that my view would make a child (i.e. my children) selfish, expecting everything handed on a plate and with a idiotic view...yes, courtesy please.

pigpen

smk77 wrote: »

You suggested that my view would make a child (i.e. my children) selfish, expecting everything handed on a plate and with a idiotic view...yes, courtesy please.

I do believe there is that possibility (with my sisters forming a perfect couple of examples) and I said nothing about your view being idiotic or even you personally.. you attacked my view in a personal manner.

anyhoo.. bed is calling.. not good this early pregnancy lark .. makes me way too tired.

Lolth

pigpen wrote: »

There is more to life than money!!!

Money makes the road smoother but it doesn't make it happier.. more often than not it makes is less happy.

I know ...in a roundabout way I was agreeing with you and what you had been saying :rotfl:

xoxo_2

smk77 wrote: »

Will you be able to afford to send them all to Uni? Will you be able to afford to help them on the housing ladder? Will you be able to contribute to their weddings? Not being able to help out with these may put children from big families at a disadvantage.

The number of children doesn't really come in to it though, does it.

I'm 1 of 2, my parents couldn't afford to send either of us to uni, help us get a house or contribute to our weddings (none of the situations has come up, but thats how it would be).

One of my aunties has 4 children, they all got all of the above.

Another family member has 7, who again all got all of the above.

Another family member has 1 and couldn't afford any of it. Infact the 'child' was made to leave school at the end of year 11 and get a job to support himself rather than be allowed to continue in education.

Another auntie has 2, and one of her children got all of the above, the youngest got nothing.

The family size has naff all to do with anything. As long as the child has love, food, clothing and a roof over their head that's all that should matter.

smk77

pigpen wrote: »

I do believe there is that possibility (with my sisters forming a perfect couple of examples) and I said nothing about your view being idiotic or even you personally.. you attacked my view in a personal manner.

anyhoo.. bed is calling.. not good this early pregnancy lark .. makes me way too tired.

maybe you need to re-read what you wrote? I didn't say that said anything about my view being idiotic..you said:

working for something they can then have pride in and a sense of achievement. They are less selfish (unless you are DD3) and have a realistic view of the world rather than some idiotic view that mummy and daddy will bail them out whenever they have gone over budget.

i.e. the child's view. So, you were basically saying that as I was prepared to help out my son he would be all those unpleasant things. I found that quite personal.

bestpud

I think it's relevant to question the financial implications tbh, and the OP has been very rude to those who have offered an opinion she does not like. I think a message board for large families may be a better option for the type of opinion she is seeking.

I find it odd tax credits don't seem to be considered a benefit by some on here. Seems to me the government are right to reduce certain benefits for large families but they are not going far enough.

So, FWIW OP (I know it's worth nothing as you only want one answer), I think you should wait until your financial situation is more stable. I know your OH is working again but you need to consider what you will do if back in the same situation again, with less help from the state this time.

If you can afford a large family then go for it, I say.